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How do I keep attracting these people? HOW?

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  • #16
    FIrstly - HOLY CARP! You get some real winners. That guy who grabbed you i'd have grabbed his hand and squeezed across the knuckles, like a painful handshake. I do NOT like being shoved around against my will.

    Secondly - I like your Captain Haddock. To actually say that out loud XD

    Thirdly - Note to self, mace here is the one in spray form. I instantly think of a flailing ball of painful doom (Morning Star) when someone says Mace, so your comment about "room in the jacket for mace" was soo much funnier XD
    "On a scale of 1 to banana, whats your favourite colour of the alphabet?"
    Regards, Lord Baron Darth von Vaderham, esq. Middle brother to mharbourgirl & Squeaksmyalias

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    • #17
      The second time you saw the nasty woman complaining about you humming you should of followed her around store humming Jaws theme song

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      • #18
        Quoth Tolly View Post
        EO: *hits the button to alert his security service* Sir, I'm calling the police.
        FDC: *suddenly lets go* Oh fuck.
        Me: I am SO pressing charges.
        FDC: *bolts, presumably unaware of the several obviously-placed security cameras*
        EO: What the hell was all that about?
        Me: I have NO bloody idea.
        Please tell me you took the time to actually make a complaint to the police. That customer's criminal's actions would absolutely terrify some people. He needs to be stopped.


        Thank god the movie was good or I may well have wept.
        Yeah, I enjoyed it too. I loved the little hints to the other Tintin books they scattered through the movie.

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        • #19
          Quoth Tolly View Post
          Shopping for the makings for a light dinner for myself and the parents. (Yeah, I'm staying with them til the medical situation settles, I cook and clean to make rent.) I'm wearing a motorcycle jacket with the Phantasy Star Online logo hand-painted onto it over a green t-shirt and beige pants. The employees wear red t-shirts and black pants.

          Me: *picking out vegetables* *humming*
          Picky Customer: You shouldn't hum when you're working, you know. It's rude.
          Me: *blink* Buh-wha?
          PC: Customers don't like it when employees hum! I don't even know what the tune is!
          Me: It's the Ambition of the Illuminus theme, now go away.
          PC: I'm going to get the manager!
          Me: Whatever.
          PC: *disappears for a few minutes, then corners me in the meat section with a manager who happens to be a friend of mine* Here! Here she is!
          Manager: ...She doesn't work here.
          PC: Yes she does!
          M: No, she doesn't. She is, however, a regular customer. How are you this week?
          Me: Great, thanks. How about you?
          M: Pretty well.
          PC: DON'T IGNORE ME!
          M: Madam, this woman obviously doesn't work here. It's terribly busy, please stop wasting my time.
          PC: *storms off in a huff* I'll never shop here again!
          M: Sheez.
          Me: Amen.
          .
          Sheesh that lady was rude. Slightly OT but do you play either the phantasy star universe/online series? I portable more myself.

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          • #20
            Wow! Tolly the Universal Employee! You work everywhere! Everything you wear is a work uniform!

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            • #21
              You should hire yourself out. I would have paid money to see you tell some of my old customers to "Piss Off!"

              Oh and how about this sonic screwdriver?

              QmX will have a "not so expensive" version later this year.
              "First time I ever seen a chainsaw go down anybody's britches,"

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              • #22
                Quoth ApolloSZ
                Thirdly - Note to self, mace here is the one in spray form. I instantly think of a flailing ball of painful doom (Morning Star) when someone says Mace, so your comment about "room in the jacket for mace" was soo much funnier XD
                I actually carry mace. Or more precisely pepper spray. But anytime I play a period appropriate game I ogle the maces (I'm more an archer or Mage). And I always think of the mace the Witch King fight Eowyn with in Return of the King. *is totally a geek*
                Driver Picks the Music, Shotgun Shuts His Cakehole.
                Supernatural 9-13-05 to forever

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                • #23
                  My favorite part is the idiot saying she didn't know what tune you were humming. That should make a difference??

                  There's gotta be a lot of stupid around these days.
                  When you start at zero, everything's progress.

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                  • #24
                    Quoth Tolly View Post
                    Encounter the Final: Local Cinema, Boxing Day

                    My friend and I are waiting in line to see Tintin, I'm dressed as Tintin and he's dressed like Captain Haddock. I've literally JUST finished telling him about the whole debacle.

                    Captain Haddock: ...Thundering Typhoons!
                    Me: Pretty much.
                    CH: How have you not started shooting at people?
                    Me: Because carrying a bow is too unwieldy.
                    CH: HAH!
                    Customer Doomed To Fail: *tugs my sleeve* Hey, which way to Gold Class?
                    Me: ...*blink* (No, no, not again.) I have no idea.
                    CH: ...*spock eyebrow*
                    CDF: What kind of customer service is this?
                    Me: The kind where I. Don't. Work. Here!
                    CDF: Then why are you dressed like Tintin?
                    Me: Because I want to marry Captain Haddock, obviously.
                    CDF: Wait, what?
                    Me: Please go ask someone else now.
                    CDF: But I'm asking you!
                    Me: *whimper*
                    CH: *shouting* Billions and billions of blistering blue barnacles!
                    CDF: *backs away* Riiiiiiiight...
                    CH: If you can't beat them, confuse them into submission.
                    Me: Whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy...

                    Thank god the movie was good or I may well have wept.
                    You mention Gold Class: are you from Australia by any chance?
                    The best professors are mad scientists! -Zoom

                    Now queen of USSR-Land...

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                    • #25
                      Reading all of this almost makes me want to go dressed up as a store employee somewhere and start messing with people. That won't happen though. Red shirt and khaki's.. Look out Target.. I like to help others though, so I would probably guide them in the right direction. Sometimes I'd overhear a conversation somewhere where people were looking for an item, and I would politely introduce myself by saying that I hope I wasn't interrupting, but then give them advice. I remember being at a Target a few years back and heard an older couple looking for an optical mouse. I was nearby and told them that "optical" and "laser" are almost the same thing, and such. Made me feel good.

                      I'm not a Dr. Who fan but have seen the sonic screwdriver on NewEgg's daily deals here and there, for those that are interested. Nothing like that $4000 one though.
                      Last edited by emax4; 01-05-2012, 02:28 AM. Reason: Edited first set of words for clarity. first came off as potential flagging material

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                      • #26
                        Tolly...were you a major SC in another life or something? That's the only thing I can think of that would be attracting all these "you MUST work here" types to you...holy cats!!

                        I've had people ask me before if I work at (whatever place we're in) but when I say no they almost always just laugh self-consciously and apologize. And if I can help them (easily), I do, since they're being nice. But these asshats you're encountering are beyond the pale...just wow.
                        "I was only LOOKING, I didn't mean to enter my card's CVV and actually ORDER! REFUND ME RIGHT NOW!!"

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                        • #27
                          Quoth emax4 View Post
                          I'm not a Dr. Who fan but have seen the sonic screwdriver on NewEgg's daily deals here and there, for those that are interested. Nothing like that $4000 one though.
                          When dealing with SCs, I think a sonic disrupter would be more useful.
                          "I don't have to be petty. The Universe does that for me."

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                          • #28
                            Damn!!!!!! someone has finally outdone Lupo in the "I am shopping" stupidity/weirdness/asshattery encounters
                            I'm lost without a paddle and headed up SH*T creek.
                            -- Life Sucks Then You Die.


                            "I'll believe corp. are people when Texas executes one."

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                            • #29
                              Quoth Racket_Man View Post
                              Damn!!!!!! someone has finally outdone Lupo in the "I am shopping" stupidity/weirdness/asshattery encounters
                              It's possible to outdo Lupo?
                              The best professors are mad scientists! -Zoom

                              Now queen of USSR-Land...

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                              • #30
                                Quoth Tolly View Post
                                FDC: FINE! I'll get the owner! *bodily drags me over to the counter* GET THE OWNER!
                                Next time some assclown does that to you? You need to show them that having undamaged balls is a privilege and not a right.

                                Kick. them. HARD.

                                That was @#$%ing assault regardless of whether or not you worked there.
                                Last edited by Mongo Skruddgemire; 01-10-2012, 04:10 AM. Reason: replaced "Jerk" with something that more befits my writing style.
                                I never lost my faith in humanity. Can't lose what you never had right?

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