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It's been happening for a while now. I started to suspect that I was fading from view about a year or so ago when I noticed a sudden increase in shoppers at the mall walking straight towards me, with purpose and conviction, never wavering or shifting their route, until they were practically right on top of me, and then going, "Whoops!" and sidestepping. It became obvious that I was virtually invisible unless one was right next to me; anything more than five feet was out of range.
The problem seemed intermittent, but the fact that it wasn't limited to people with cell phones wedged in their ears made me wonder whether something else was going on. These people weren't entirely distracted; they might be glancing into windows at a walker's pace, so I should have triggered their proximity alarm at some point, however, the fact that a five foot eight hairy man dragging forty pounds of bags through the mall is standing right next to them doesn't register until they're practically on top of me, at which point they give a little yelp, mumble their pardons, and scurry away. Nor is the mall crowded - they're not being funneled towards me by the pressure of other people weighing in on them. They simply and confidently march in my direction, sometimes looking right at me, until I startle them by existing.
It happened five times at the mall today, and never by a distracted person. The guy in the Hoverround was the most startled - I had no idea those things could go that fast. But the middle-aged lady who said "Oh excuse me!" to me, turned, and walked straight into a sweater display was, at the least, most interesting. I left the Sears half expecting to hear an almighty crash and a string of swear words.
Worst of all, it's starting to happen when I'm driving. There seem to be a lot of people who want the lane I'm in and aren't in the slightest bothered by the fact that I'm in it.
So, that's it. I've become invisible. I'm thinking of whistling everywhere I go. Wearing tap shoes might help, too. Or maybe I could just go without bathing.
The problem seemed intermittent, but the fact that it wasn't limited to people with cell phones wedged in their ears made me wonder whether something else was going on. These people weren't entirely distracted; they might be glancing into windows at a walker's pace, so I should have triggered their proximity alarm at some point, however, the fact that a five foot eight hairy man dragging forty pounds of bags through the mall is standing right next to them doesn't register until they're practically on top of me, at which point they give a little yelp, mumble their pardons, and scurry away. Nor is the mall crowded - they're not being funneled towards me by the pressure of other people weighing in on them. They simply and confidently march in my direction, sometimes looking right at me, until I startle them by existing.
It happened five times at the mall today, and never by a distracted person. The guy in the Hoverround was the most startled - I had no idea those things could go that fast. But the middle-aged lady who said "Oh excuse me!" to me, turned, and walked straight into a sweater display was, at the least, most interesting. I left the Sears half expecting to hear an almighty crash and a string of swear words.
Worst of all, it's starting to happen when I'm driving. There seem to be a lot of people who want the lane I'm in and aren't in the slightest bothered by the fact that I'm in it.
So, that's it. I've become invisible. I'm thinking of whistling everywhere I go. Wearing tap shoes might help, too. Or maybe I could just go without bathing.
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