And you said that WHY?

[fireheart]

No offence to the British, but how stupid can you be?

Tonight's episode of border security aired as follows..l

-black man (this is important) has been back and forthing to Australia for the last eight years. In those eight years, he has been stopped and searched seven times. (Working out to one stop a year roughly) the race card is pulled, twice, he then gets pissy and demands a supervisor. He also gets pissy because he was born in west Africa and apparently according to SOMEBODY, west Africans cause "trouble". Apparently because his wife is Australian, he's British and he speaks English, he should be able to zip through. His rant was merely ignored by the customs officers. His wife just tittered and admitted she was embarrassed...

-two other passengers are both doing the chatty thing in their respective areas (customs and immigration) until oops...turns out the man in immigration lied on his document saying that he hasn't served time when he actually has. His crime was drug trafficking, albeit not internationally. He wasn't sucky, just seemed more ashamed about both the crime and his failure to read instructions. Sadly his visa appeared to be cancelled on character grounds.


On the other end of the scale, the man in customs appears to be slightly inebriated and accidentally lets slip that he has also done time albeit "years ago". His main crime was drunk and disorderly. He did go around and around for a while, his explanation was that after a certain period of time, his record would've been expunged. He on the other hand was released.

[Beckpatton]

I was suprised to see the drunk and disorderly guy get through ok, as he kept dodging the questions.. Took forever to get a straight answer from him, made me think he had more to hide.

[Sandiercy]

You have been on this site for how long and have to ask "how stupid can you be?"

Typical SC "logic" states that if it sounds right in your head, it is right.

[fireheart]

I was suprised to see the drunk and disorderly guy get through ok, as he kept dodging the questions.. Took forever to get a straight answer from him, made me think he had more to hide.

I suspect that the reason why was that technically his conviction HAD been "expunged" and thus, he didn't have a conviction on his record anymore. So technically, him ticking on his passenger card that he didn't have a criminal conviction was true. He just brought it up at the wrong time.

I can't wait to see next week's episode now....

[muppet101]

The highlight of this weekend is a three hour block of back to back shows of this- even though I'm British i bloody love it.

[LillFilly]

Can I find this show online?

[Jay 2K Winger]

I'll admit, I originally heard of this show because a (then-indy) pro wrestler called Chris Hero was featured in a segment. (Hero now works for WWE's NXT brand as Kassius Ohno.)

[fireheart]

The highlight of this weekend is a three hour block of back to back shows of this- even though I'm British i bloody love it.

We get a 1-hour block of Border Security: Australia's Front Line, plus another show, which was formerly The Force (cop show) and now it's Airways...

Can I find this show online?

If you youtube Border Security Australia, you'll be able to find old episodes.

I'll admit, I originally heard of this show because a (then-indy) pro wrestler called Chris Hero was featured in a segment. (Hero now works for WWE's NXT brand as Kassius Ohno.)

Which segment?

[muppet101]

It's also known as Nothing To Declare for some reason over here, not Border Security.

[crazylegs]

I suspect that the reason why was that technically his conviction HAD been "expunged" and thus, he didn't have a conviction on his record anymore. So technically, him ticking on his passenger card that he didn't have a criminal conviction was true.

What a silly boy. His record is maintained however under the Rehabilitation of Offenders Act he doesn't need to declare it if asked in the UK (although obviously some professions always have to declare...). Any conviction ever remains forever on PNC, including those from when someone was convicted under the age of 18.

[Seshat]

One of the things you'll notice is that our border security people are fanatical about imported plent and animal matter.

There's a whole bunch of plant/animal diseases we don't have, and Quarantine wants to keep it that way! For this reason, when I used to travel, I would keep any foodstuffs or plant/animal matter souveniers in my carry-on, and declare it.

90% of the time you're fine - and as long as you declare it, they're cool with you bringing it that far even if they do confiscate it. (In my experience, they always tell you why, too.)

It's only if you try to slip something past Quarantine that they get pissed off - and when Quarantine is pissed off, it's B.A.D. bad!
We don't want any more cane toads. Or rabbits. Or foxes. Or.....

[fireheart]

One of the things you'll notice is that our border security people are fanatical about imported plent and animal matter.

There's a whole bunch of plant/animal diseases we don't have, and Quarantine wants to keep it that way! For this reason, when I used to travel, I would keep any foodstuffs or plant/animal matter souveniers in my carry-on, and declare it.

90% of the time you're fine - and as long as you declare it, they're cool with you bringing it that far even if they do confiscate it. (In my experience, they always tell you why, too.)

It's only if you try to slip something past Quarantine that they get pissed off - and when Quarantine is pissed off, it's B.A.D. bad!
We don't want any more cane toads. Or rabbits. Or foxes. Or.....

Also generally with quarantine, if needed, they can irradiate it.

Although that said, Quarantine is a completely different department.

Quarantine is run by the Australian Quarantine Inspection Service, which is a subgroup of the Department of Fisheries.
Customs is run by the Australian Customs and Border Protection Service. They work closely together though. (this is why you might see the Border Security folk wearing blue shirts and the Quarantine folks wearing white or maroon)

I've heard of some stories involving athames being pulled from luggage and then the owners having to explain why they're travelling with a knife (and yes, I can understand that it's not for cutting anyone and it's only used on a spiritual plane). Unlike the sister show in the UK however (known as Customs), we don't get a lot of stories about people smuggling cigarettes.

I now get 2 days a week of pwnage.

Sunday night: Border Security/Airways.

Wednesday night: Motorway Patrol (basically "I'm not drink driving, that stop sign came out of nowhere" for 30 minutes)/The Force (cop show along the lines of "COPS" but generally more narrative in nature)

[Gizmo]

Which segment?

He was trying to sneak in on a tourist visa to do an actual professional appearance. They allowed him in but warned him not to do the performance.

[fireheart]

He was trying to sneak in on a tourist visa to do an actual professional appearance. They allowed him in but warned him not to do the performance.

Oooh I think I remember that one. Or maybe I'm thinking of another one.

There were two I think....one may have been that, the other one from memory was some guy trying to do the same thing, but his employer had given him the wrong paperwork. They let him in and told his employer to do the paperwork by a certain date. The guy got deported because the correct paperwork hadn't been filled in on time.

ETA: I forgot to add something as well to the gentleman who was in immigration. He'd come over on a working holiday visa (this was one of the more redeeming qualities as he'd actually applied for the correct visa, unlike some people who apply for the tourist-only visa and look for work while on the visa-a BIG no-no). One of the requirements of said visa is that you need to be under the age of 30. When you're deported for any reason, you are subject to a 3-year exclusion period*. By the time that period ends, he won't be able to apply for another working holiday visa as he'll be too old. Admittedly he took it fairly well.

*=I'm not 100% up to speed on this, but New Zealanders have a special clearance visa that allows them to come into Australia for varying reasons-usually centred around spending time with their family in Australia or similar. One of the requirements is that you must not have been spent 12 months or more in jail and the offences stack up over time. One guy I remember was denied the right to enter Australia on said visa but was allowed to apply for a normal visa as the offences consisted of mostly assault and battery charges, he'd since been in therapy and was trying to do right by everyone. Unlike the guy above, I don't think he was subject to the exclusion period.

[TheCheerfulTreeRat]

90% of the time you're fine - and as long as you declare it, they're cool with you bringing it that far even if they do confiscate it. (In my experience, they always tell you why, too.)

Absolutely! I declared a jar of bedbugs, when I was asked (somewhat incredulously) if I was serious I hoiked out the jar for the, by now, large group of inspectors. They wouldn't let them in as they were but rounded up all the alcohol vials they could find to ensure the tissue in the jar was well and truly soaked, then let me in.