That bumper? It's mine not yours

[Mytical]

Dear Tailgater,
You know that bumper that you have been riding? The one that your vehicle is close enough to kiss? It's mine not yours, just in case there is some confusion. I know the vehicle in front of you is nice and shiny red, and might be distracting, but really that bumper? Mine. Not yours. Ok?

While I'm at it, that red sign in front of me? Means stop. No it doesn't mean "Stop when there are vehicles, but it's ok to ignore if there is not" it means STOP. Which is hard to do with you basically pushing me along. Yeah, I came to a complete stop. Deal with it. There is another lane, use it if I am driving too slow by going the speed limit..on a deserted road..in the middle of the fratching night.

Lastly, gunning your engine nets the opposite result you are aiming for. Each time you gun your engine, I wait just that much longer before going. I've got all the time in the world, cause I leave early. Care to wait me out? I assure you, I have way more patience then you.

Thank you,
Somebody who actually obeys street laws, regardless if there is somebody around or not.

[Captain Trips]

Sounds like someone with this new, weird mindset: "It's only wrong if you get caught." (Never did understand that - wrong is wrong, whether you get away with it or not.)

[Mouse]

Dear Tailgater,
You know that bumper that you have been riding? It's mine not yours

I want this as a bumper sticker XD

[Treasure]

perhaps "My car is a lesbian, don't ride her ass!"

[RecoveringKinkoid]

I want one that says "clearly you don't know how insurance works."

[blas]

I like the one that says "If you're gonna ride my ass, at least pull my hair."

Or....

"If you get any closer, I'll fart!"

[Treasure]

"tailgate and roll for damage" (for my gamer friends)

"the closer you get, the slower i go"

2 more that i've seen and love!

[Daemonmonkey]

I like this one

"If you can read this, Go and get som glasses because youre F***ng too close!"

[Frantic Freddie]

I want one that says "clearly you don't know how insurance works."

That one I like

[Mytical]

Hmm, maybe we should make a bumper sticker business? We have some nice ones already.

[Jay 2K Winger]

Hmm, maybe we should make a bumper sticker business? We have some nice ones already.

I agree. From the "Clearly you don't know how insurance works" to "The closer you get, the slower I go" to "Rev that engine louder, I can't hear how small your dick is."

[Mycroft]

Saw one this weekend: "Tailgaters cause brake checks."

[wolfie]

How about "Your horn and high beams are not connected to my accelerator"

[Salted Grump]

'If you can read this, I can slam on my brakes and sue you.'

[dalesys]

Insurance by Smith & Wesson. Legal services by Kalashnikov.