Say (no) Cheese...(LONG)

[sms001]

I really want to ask them where on this planet they order pizza that doesn't come with cheese.

Right? It always confused me too - I'd often ask if they wanted EXTRA cheese as a second ingredient; cue dumbfounded stare.

[zigcat]

Right? It always confused me too - I'd often ask if they wanted EXTRA cheese as a second ingredient; cue dumbfounded stare.

We do that as well whenever someone asks for what normally comes standard on our pizza: Regular crust, sauce and mozzarella.

[Evannah]

You gave just as good as he gave you, and for that, I applaud you. I hate that we're supposed to be nice and apologise and bend over backwards to a customer who is screaming and yelling names at us.

[PuckLizardRN]

Wow...just wow. I can't think of one pizza that does not come automatically with cheese.

[Ophbalance]

I know of exactly ONE place that has a regular pizza without cheese. And it's a variant of a Pesto pizza with broccoli and spices and whatnot. However, it's not a chain, and it's in North East PA. It's a nice little place, even has a brick oven for doing specialty pies in. But that's more the exception that proves the norm . If any of you folks happen to swing by Centralia to see the never ending fire (well, ok, there's not really anything to SEE) or Pottsville to hit up the Yeungling brewery I can give directions! You cannot spit without hitting a church/bar/italian joint in that neck of the woods.

[EricKei]

There's a smaller-size, albeit international, pizza chain where I used to work that has a pizza that comes with pesto, fresh basil (as in actual leaves! *gasp*) and feta cheese on it by default -- no mozzarella, but it did have cheese all the same. For the reason I mentioned in another post, pizzas in the US come with cheese unless you request otherwise.

As an aside, that was the place that taught me to appreciate feta I hadn't wanted to try it before that, as I always saw it as this odd crumbly stuff that came in buckets of brine >_< One day, my curiosity got the better of me and we made a crew pie with beef, oregano, mozz, and feta on a white sauce base. end result: I found out that I like feta, and that it's even better toasted on top of the other ingredients Now not only a covert, but an addict. I pick it up whenever the grocery has it on special.

[Argus]

I know of exactly ONE place that has a regular pizza without cheese.

And I know of one in Indianapolis with a vegan pizza on the menu: spinach, artichoke hearts, onions, broccoli, green olives, diced tomatoes, portabella mushrooms, and no cheese. (One of the cooks is a vegan.)

[otakuneko]

So when this guy goes to a burger joint and orders a burger, does he get upset when it comes with lettuce and tomato on it?

[SailorMan]

That's like being shocked your hamburger came with a bun

On my first Merchant Marine ship, I was on the 'shocked' end, for something similar.

Most of the cooks on the ship were born in a country where the typical cuisine served in American homes weren't ever a part of the menu. Such things as spaghetti, which is what I ordered.

"Just spaghetti?" asked the steward, in a surprised voice. I wasn't particularly hungry -- didn't want Italian bread or a veggie, so I replied "Yep." The other officers at the table gave each other looks, but said nothing.

The steward brought me a plate with just the spaghetti noodles. I asked him where the sauce was. Angrily, he told me: "Next time, if you want sauce, you tell me you want sauce!" And then he stormed away.

The officers just laughed at me.

[MoonCat]

Ophbalance - So, Centralia's still burning? Man, there should be a way to harness the heat!

Re: a "plain" burger - what kind of idiot even orders something that is listed as a cheeseburger, and then demands that it come without cheese? How on earth can anyone be so stupid that they think there's something different about a "cheeseburger with no cheese" vs. a HAMBURGER (usually no cheese to begin with)?

Honestly, I really believe that some people live such pathetic lives that they get their jollies by making unreasonable demands everywhere they go. It's their way of proving to themselves that they "matter"

[NecessaryCatharsis]

I used to work at a fast food joint which sold both hamburgers and cheeseburgers. The differences - 25 cents and a piece of cheese. I had one lady insist, vehemently, that she wanted a cheeseburger without cheese. I finally gave in and punched it in. When the grill guy got he yelled up `What the HELL!` I just shrug, `you can read, and make sure it comes in a cheeseburger wrapper`. I guess he told the manager because she came up and asked me, I told her to go argue with the lady, I was over it. The manager finally gave up trying to convince the lady and gave her the hamburger, in a cheeseburger wrapper, that she had overpaid for. Sometimes you just have to go by `the customer is always right`, if they want to overpay who are we to stand in their way?

[TopEndDave]

SC: You got a bunch of incompetent hippies working down there? I've been ordering from you for 20 years.

And in those previous 20 years he has never mentioned NO CHEESE. Otherwise would know him as the NO CHEESE guy.

It would be nice to have all orders from now on go:
"Thanks to Mr SC at number we now have to verify all ingredients of your pizza. Do you want crust? Do you want sauce? Do you want cheese?" and so on etc. That way your customer could call Mr SC and tell him that pizzas come with cheese unless you say NO CHEESE.

I used to work at a fast food joint which sold both hamburgers and cheeseburgers.

I watched a friend of mine try to take an order from a customer at Hungry Jacks (Burger King) where the customer used the term cheeseburger instead of whopper randomly. My friend got that confused that the manager had to step in. The customer wanted a large whopper meal with a chocolate thick shake. Kept saying cheeseburger and got angry when my friend couldn't get the order right.

[XCashier]

Ophbalance - So, Centralia's still burning? Man, there should be a way to harness the heat!

According to the Wikipedia article, "it could burn for over 250 more years." As for harnessing the heat, you also have to deal with lethal gasses and sudden ground collapses...don't think too many energy companies are going to want to work with that.

[Racket_Man]

I used to work at a fast food joint which sold both hamburgers and cheeseburgers. The differences - 25 cents and a piece of cheese. I had one lady insist, vehemently, that she wanted a cheeseburger without cheese. I finally gave in and punched it in. When the grill guy got he yelled up `What the HELL!` I just shrug, `you can read, and make sure it comes in a cheeseburger wrapper`. I guess he told the manager because she came up and asked me, I told her to go argue with the lady, I was over it. The manager finally gave up trying to convince the lady and gave her the hamburger, in a cheeseburger wrapper, that she had overpaid for. Sometimes you just have to go by `the customer is always right`, if they want to overpay who are we to stand in their way?

Defineately NOT an urban legend. I had the exact same thing happen 35 years ago when I worked at a Burger King. Much explaining to no avail. cooked up a hamburger and wrapped it in a cheeseburger paper and the customer was happy.

[AccountingDrone]

I can personally vouch for this one from when I lived down NOLA way -- Take stale french bread (at least 24 hours old), cut it into 1" cubes, soak it in an egg wash (beaten eggs and milk), then bake until crispy. Voila: Pain perdu. Literally, "lost bread" - a variation on French toast that goes really well with powdered sugar.

As for sausage...I'm not sure I wanna know exactly what goes in them, tho boudin -- where one of the main ingredients (aside from meat) is rice -- is damn tasty, and a good way to stretch ingredients.

French toast or some other name for using up leftover and stale bread goes all the way back to the middle ages. We love making fun stuff with leftovers - had bulgogi pork with rice tonight, so tomorrow we make rice pudding. Or maybe carolina rice cakes [leftover rice, flour, milk, egg, cinnamon, sugar. Make into a stiff dough and pat into patties, fry up and serve with brandied hard sauce or I suppose golden syrup or maple syrup]