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My favorite guest complaints

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  • #16
    Quoth wolfie View Post
    Just curious, but are pepperoni, meat lover's, hawaiian, and most other pizzas "all ages", but you need to show government-issued photo ID that proves you're 21 or older if you want to get a margherita?

    OK, everyone - before you start with the boos, remember that CS doesn't have a provision for showing proof of age.
    But I left my ID in the car!
    "They gave me a badge with my name on it. In case I forget who I am." Dr Who - Closing Time

    "I reject your reality and substitute my own." Adam Savage-Mythbusters

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    • #17
      Quoth Amina516 View Post
      People... Cant live with them, cant hurt them legally.
      Not legally, no....

      Quoth notalwaysright View Post
      1&2: Okay, we'll just have to rip the resort down and start over. You personally get to approve the final size. THEN will you be happy?
      No.

      Quoth notalwaysright View Post
      3&4: So we'll buy the convenience store and make it part of the resort, and also lobby the city/wherever to raise the speed limit. What speed would you like?
      None. Or barring that, 120.

      Quoth notalwaysright View Post
      5: We'll make signs which say, "look around, you are at the beach."
      Not specific enough.

      Quoth notalwaysright View Post
      6: Certainly! We will build a menu-room for books with every single possible dish we could make.
      Too much reading. We're on vacation, damn it!

      Quoth Lovecats View Post
      But I left my ID in the car!
      I deal with that one often. And variations thereof. Sadly for these people, leaving their ID in their car, hotel, other purse, on the cruise ship, with their husband, in their other pants, in last night's costume, or with their guard kangaroo still doesn't change in any way Florida's law concerning alcohol purchases and proper identification.

      I'd shed a tear for them if I actually gave a shit.

      "The Customer Is Always Right...But The Bartender Decides Who Is       Still A Customer."

      Comment

      • #18
        Quoth Kit-Ginevra View Post
        Have you tried the Good King Wenceslas pizza?








        It's deep pan,crisp and even Thank you very much,I'll be here all week,enjoy the veal...
        OMG, that's one that my Dad - who used to love puns- would have giveen his eye teeth to have thought of

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        • #19
          Quoth Jester View Post
          or with their guard kangaroo
          If anybody else said this, I would think maybe they were taking a bit of poetic license, but since it's Jester, I'm thinking there has to be a story here.
          At the conclusion of an Irish wedding, the priest said "Everybody please hug the person who has made your life worth living. The bartender was nearly crushed to death.

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          • #20
            Quoth jennie View Post
            OMG, that's one that my Dad - who used to love puns- would have giveen his eye teeth to have thought of
            I don't get it. I just don't get it. I must be unfamiliar with something here....but I have no idea what.

            Quoth mathnerd View Post
            If anybody else said this, I would think maybe they were taking a bit of poetic license, but since it's Jester, I'm thinking there has to be a story here.
            Yes, because I never say anything outrageous or ridiculous.

            No, in this case, it was purely poetic license, hyperbole, and silliness to make a point. I have never seen a kangaroo on this island, and get the feeling that the only way I ever would would be either in a cartoon or on a menu.

            "The Customer Is Always Right...But The Bartender Decides Who Is             Still A Customer."

            Comment

            • #21
              Quoth MoonCat View Post
              #5 reminds me of an episode of Fawlty Towers where a guest was complaining about beach access. Basil ripped open the shades and pointed out the window. "THAT'S TOR QUAY!!!!!"
              That's the sea. Between the land and the sky.

              Comment

              • #22
                Quoth Jester View Post
                Yes, because I never say anything outrageous or ridiculous.

                No, in this case, it was purely poetic license, hyperbole, and silliness to make a point. I have never seen a kangaroo on this island, and get the feeling that the only way I ever would would be either in a cartoon or on a menu.
                It's not that you never say anything outrageous, but that it's Key West. I'm disappointed there's not a story...
                At the conclusion of an Irish wedding, the priest said "Everybody please hug the person who has made your life worth living. The bartender was nearly crushed to death.

                Comment

                • #23
                  Quoth Kit-Ginevra View Post
                  Have you tried the Good King Wenceslas pizza?

                  It's deep pan,crisp and even.
                  Quoth Jester View Post
                  I don't get it. I just don't get it. I must be unfamiliar with something here....but I have no idea what.
                  It is play on the words from the song.

                  Good King Wenceslas looked out on the feast of Stephen,
                  when the snow lay round about, deep and crisp and even.
                  Brightly shown the moon that night, though the frost was cruel,
                  when a poor man came in sight,gathering winter fuel.
                  I didn't get it either and had to Google it. I think it is a weak joke.
                  "I don't have to be petty. The Universe does that for me."

                  Comment

                  • #24
                    Quoth mathnerd View Post
                    It's not that you never say anything outrageous, but that it's Key West. I'm disappointed there's not a story...
                    I am sure he could come up with something
                    EVE Online: 99% of the time you sit around waiting for something to happen, but that 1% of action is what hooks people like crack, you don't get interviewed by the BBC for a WoW raid.

                    Comment

                    • #25
                      What?! How did these people even manage to get to the resort?! I... I... just don't understand! A freaking fly is smarter than these people!
                      How have I not killed anyone yet?

                      Comment

                      • #26
                        Quoth mathnerd View Post
                        It's not that you never say anything outrageous, but that it's Key West. I'm disappointed there's not a story...
                        Okay, to be fair, it IS Key West, or as many call it, Key Weird, so I can see that anything might be expected, as just about anything could happen here. Sorry to disappoint you, though.

                        Quoth AccountingDrone View Post
                        I am sure he could come up with something
                        For a guard kangaroo? I could fake something, sure. Even make it sound believable, more so to anyone who's been to this crazy little island. But, honestly, that's just not me.

                        That being said, I DO have a guard chicken in my truck, guarding the truck from all enemies, foreign and domestic. And that includes rogue kangaroos. And on this point, I am being absolutely honest, no poetic license needed.

                        "The Customer Is Always Right...But The Bartender Decides Who Is                         Still A Customer."

                        Comment

                        • #27
                          Quoth wolfie View Post
                          Just curious, but are pepperoni, meat lover's, hawaiian, and most other pizzas "all ages", but you need to show government-issued photo ID that proves you're 21 or older if you want to get a margherita?
                          *groan* Maybe if the tomatoes were left in alcohol for a while...

                          Quoth Jester View Post
                          guard kangaroo
                          What?!?!?! (Also I didn't realise that kangaroos had escaped from Aussieland )

                          Also re the Good King joke: I had to sing the song in my head before I got it. Anyone else did this?
                          The best professors are mad scientists! -Zoom

                          Now queen of USSR-Land...

                          Comment

                          • #28
                            I recently left my payroll clerk position to work full time again at the hotel and was promoted to Assistant Manager. As Assistant Manager, I now read the guest comments on our company website as well as Trip Advisor and I have seen all of these or variants of the complaints. Part of my job is to respond to the complaints.

                            Hopefully I made the right decision to become Assistant Manager. Not only am I responding to every guest issue, I am dealing with the drama of my co-workers which is a different animal.

                            Comment

                            • #29
                              Quoth hotelnpa View Post
                              Part of my job is to respond to the complaints.
                              Don't forget, you are high enough up the food chain you can delegate.

                              Our AGM likes to send my CWs the more obnoxious complaints (somehow, I've avoided being assigned responses all but once). He says it's to see how we respond, but I'm fairly sure it's really 'cause he just doesn't want to deal with them.
                              Knowledge is knowing that a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.

                              Comment

                              • #30
                                Quoth Jester View Post
                                I have never seen a kangaroo on this island, and get the feeling that the only way I ever would would be either in a cartoon or on a menu.
                                Well... they are both comedic and delicious!

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