So, I was sure I'd have an excellent Cussing out Co-Irkers story for ya'll today, and I kinda still do, but the original COCW was one upped in a way that proves the Universe has the sickest sense of humor anyone has seen.
Our story starts when I walked in the gate this morning, there was no sign of my designated vehicle.
It wasn't where I left it last night, and a quick run around of the usual hiding spots (service bays, side storage lot and the "dead storage" out behind employee parking where the abandoned stuff goes) turns up nothing.
So, with a pit in my stomach, dreading the answer, I walk up to towing manager and ask him where my ride went.
"It's not out back?"
I was afraid he'd say that...
"Nope, and it's not in service, on the side, or in storage, so, uh, did something happen to it?"
Towing Manager runs off to ask Service Manager if they know anything about it's current whereabouts.
Why yes, they do.
They sent two of their less-talented boys out early this morning to pick up a car from the local rental car place and bring it in for a quick tune-up and oil change. Since the car in question still drives on it's own and doesn't need towed, they didn't see a problem with two guys not trained in towing using my truck to ferry over there, since I wasn't due in for another hour. (There's a designated "gopher" vehicle for this kinda stuff, but it was out too, hence I got carjacked)
So they drove over to the rental place, got in the rental car, and drove back.
See where the mistake was made?
Yeah, you read that right.
THEY BOTH GOT IN THE CAR, THEY BOTH DROVE BACK
NEITHER ONE THOUGHT TO DRIVE THE TRUCK BACK!!!!

The service manager is now going to kill them, then towing manager is going to kill them, and then I am going to kill them. There won't be enough left of them to bury in a lunchbox by the time we're done.... promise you that.
So, while Dumb and Dumber are sent back over to return the rental car (oil change is done) and bring back my vehicle, under penalty of a fourth death, I'm sulking off in the corner of the office, nursing some very impure thoughts about my fellow man. That's when I become aware that our dispatcher/receptionist is having a spirited one-sided argument with someone one the phone, but I only catch the last part:
"Yes, it will cost extra to change the tire unless you do it yourself. ..... Well, you can think whatever you want, Sir, it's still $480 to pick your car up plus $45 for a tire service. Sir.... Sir I.... whatever.... " *clickslam* (she hung up on him mid-rant it would appear)
"Another satisfied customer?"
"Ugh, this guy... he's gonna be real fun when he comes in...he got a DUI last night and is blaming us for it"
"Huh?"
She tosses me the tow sheet from the "to be released" pile
"Read and be amazed"
Hmmm, looks like this call came in last night when Yup was on. At 11pm, location was Soandso Apartments.... hmmm...... woah, that's a lot of check boxes ticked off....
- winch fee
- cleanup fee
- standby fee (up to first full hour)
- impound fee
Yeah, that's nearly five hundred clams in charges, and, under the "notes" section we have:
"Hung up on landscaping, damage to property, called PD, DUI Impound per Officer X"
So now it's starting to make some sense. This guy apparently drove onto the landscaping at that apartment, and into a ditch, got stuck/immobilized from all that resulting damage, called us for a winch-out, and when Yup got on scene, he put 2 and 2 together and, as he is legally obligated to do when damage occurs to persons or property other than that of the vehicle owner, he called the cops, who administered a DUI test of some kind that the driver failed and the car was impounded.
And now, in addition to owing the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania a hefty chunk of change, he owes us about six times what he thought he would when he called us and assumed we'd be complicit in his felony....
There's also a note in the "Vehicle damages" section that this car has an enormous scrape down the passengers side, and the right rear tire is flat. You really have to go hard aground to do that. Looking out the window across the impound yard, I can see that gouge from about 40 yards away... not good, and I can also see the RR tire is, missing... the WHEEL is there, but there isn't a shred of vulcanized rubber left on it. Yup put a cinder block under it so it would sit level when he unloaded it... wow. And that's what he was chimping out at dispatcher for, that's only his total so far, if he needs a tire change to get him rolling (assuming he has a spare) $45 is going to be tacked on.
That was the point at which he told the dispatcher that we were crooks (irony!) and that "our (sic) name means nothing to him anymore because we're dishonest!" (because hiding a DUI isn't, dontcha know?) which is where she pulled his plug like your rich Grandpa's life support.
Ah, here comes Towing Manager, probably back from killing those two dead guys from the service department who ran off with my truck....
"What are you still doing here?"
"Waiting for my truck to get back"
"They haven't left for it yet?!"
"I guess not, it's not here..."
Towing Manager does the honest-to-goodness Picard faceplam, and heads out to kill the two dopes from service again.
He's back a second later,
"They brought it back and parked it out front in the street"
"Out front- front? Why? They know I'm waiting back here, where the tow trucks are parked...."
"You really need to ask why? With those two, Really?"
"No, no I don't, I've owned livestock smarter than them, and it's not over yet"
"Huh?"
"While you were gone, we got a call from this guy *hands him tow sheet*, heads-up, he thinks we should've let him get away with a DUI"
Towing manager scans the paperwork
"Great, this is ALL I need today"
"Yeah, and it's not drivable either, right rear is a railroad car wheel, gonna need a tire change and the dispatcher already told him he's paying extra for it."
Manager glances out the window at the car in question and says a not-so-nice-word.
"Keep me posted, I wanna know if he's half the dick he sounded like on the phone with dispatcher"
"Get outta here.... before I start firing EVERYONE"
"Luv ya too"
So, I got out to stir up some trouble amongst the populace for a few hours and return to the shop sometime after lunch and notice a marked insurance company car parked behind the one-legged DUImobile.
Touching base with everyone in the office, it seems the owner of the car has sent the insurance adjustor over to write up a report on how bad the damage is and get back to him.
Because he wasn't the one driving it last night.
His mechanic was.
Yeah, he gave the car to his mechanic friend to do some kind of work on it, mechanic friend proceeded to get drunk, crash, and yadda yadda yadda..... that's where I came in. Oh, and when he fessed up to his friend that the car was damaged, he tried to pin the damage ON US from the tow....
when the owner called us, this was the first time he'd even HEARD about the DUI, since mechanic was booked and released with a court date, he tried to play it cool and claim that he just got the car towed for illegal parking or some such, and we were the ones who tore off the tire and gouged up the side. (and remember, we're the ones who are crooked in all of this!)
Somehow, it gets better, and you're going to swear I'm making this up... but.... the "mechanic friend" who did this?
Anyone remember this guy? - http://www.customerssuck.com/board/s...d.php?t=107350
IT
WAS
HIM!!!!!



Mama Mia, that's a SPICY load of karma....
Our story starts when I walked in the gate this morning, there was no sign of my designated vehicle.
It wasn't where I left it last night, and a quick run around of the usual hiding spots (service bays, side storage lot and the "dead storage" out behind employee parking where the abandoned stuff goes) turns up nothing.
So, with a pit in my stomach, dreading the answer, I walk up to towing manager and ask him where my ride went.
"It's not out back?"
I was afraid he'd say that...

"Nope, and it's not in service, on the side, or in storage, so, uh, did something happen to it?"
Towing Manager runs off to ask Service Manager if they know anything about it's current whereabouts.
Why yes, they do.
They sent two of their less-talented boys out early this morning to pick up a car from the local rental car place and bring it in for a quick tune-up and oil change. Since the car in question still drives on it's own and doesn't need towed, they didn't see a problem with two guys not trained in towing using my truck to ferry over there, since I wasn't due in for another hour. (There's a designated "gopher" vehicle for this kinda stuff, but it was out too, hence I got carjacked)
So they drove over to the rental place, got in the rental car, and drove back.
See where the mistake was made?
Yeah, you read that right.
THEY BOTH GOT IN THE CAR, THEY BOTH DROVE BACK
NEITHER ONE THOUGHT TO DRIVE THE TRUCK BACK!!!!


The service manager is now going to kill them, then towing manager is going to kill them, and then I am going to kill them. There won't be enough left of them to bury in a lunchbox by the time we're done.... promise you that.
So, while Dumb and Dumber are sent back over to return the rental car (oil change is done) and bring back my vehicle, under penalty of a fourth death, I'm sulking off in the corner of the office, nursing some very impure thoughts about my fellow man. That's when I become aware that our dispatcher/receptionist is having a spirited one-sided argument with someone one the phone, but I only catch the last part:
"Yes, it will cost extra to change the tire unless you do it yourself. ..... Well, you can think whatever you want, Sir, it's still $480 to pick your car up plus $45 for a tire service. Sir.... Sir I.... whatever.... " *clickslam* (she hung up on him mid-rant it would appear)
"Another satisfied customer?"
"Ugh, this guy... he's gonna be real fun when he comes in...he got a DUI last night and is blaming us for it"
"Huh?"
She tosses me the tow sheet from the "to be released" pile
"Read and be amazed"
Hmmm, looks like this call came in last night when Yup was on. At 11pm, location was Soandso Apartments.... hmmm...... woah, that's a lot of check boxes ticked off....
- winch fee
- cleanup fee
- standby fee (up to first full hour)
- impound fee
Yeah, that's nearly five hundred clams in charges, and, under the "notes" section we have:
"Hung up on landscaping, damage to property, called PD, DUI Impound per Officer X"
So now it's starting to make some sense. This guy apparently drove onto the landscaping at that apartment, and into a ditch, got stuck/immobilized from all that resulting damage, called us for a winch-out, and when Yup got on scene, he put 2 and 2 together and, as he is legally obligated to do when damage occurs to persons or property other than that of the vehicle owner, he called the cops, who administered a DUI test of some kind that the driver failed and the car was impounded.
And now, in addition to owing the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania a hefty chunk of change, he owes us about six times what he thought he would when he called us and assumed we'd be complicit in his felony....
There's also a note in the "Vehicle damages" section that this car has an enormous scrape down the passengers side, and the right rear tire is flat. You really have to go hard aground to do that. Looking out the window across the impound yard, I can see that gouge from about 40 yards away... not good, and I can also see the RR tire is, missing... the WHEEL is there, but there isn't a shred of vulcanized rubber left on it. Yup put a cinder block under it so it would sit level when he unloaded it... wow. And that's what he was chimping out at dispatcher for, that's only his total so far, if he needs a tire change to get him rolling (assuming he has a spare) $45 is going to be tacked on.
That was the point at which he told the dispatcher that we were crooks (irony!) and that "our (sic) name means nothing to him anymore because we're dishonest!" (because hiding a DUI isn't, dontcha know?) which is where she pulled his plug like your rich Grandpa's life support.
Ah, here comes Towing Manager, probably back from killing those two dead guys from the service department who ran off with my truck....
"What are you still doing here?"
"Waiting for my truck to get back"
"They haven't left for it yet?!"
"I guess not, it's not here..."
Towing Manager does the honest-to-goodness Picard faceplam, and heads out to kill the two dopes from service again.
He's back a second later,
"They brought it back and parked it out front in the street"
"Out front- front? Why? They know I'm waiting back here, where the tow trucks are parked...."
"You really need to ask why? With those two, Really?"
"No, no I don't, I've owned livestock smarter than them, and it's not over yet"
"Huh?"
"While you were gone, we got a call from this guy *hands him tow sheet*, heads-up, he thinks we should've let him get away with a DUI"
Towing manager scans the paperwork
"Great, this is ALL I need today"
"Yeah, and it's not drivable either, right rear is a railroad car wheel, gonna need a tire change and the dispatcher already told him he's paying extra for it."
Manager glances out the window at the car in question and says a not-so-nice-word.
"Keep me posted, I wanna know if he's half the dick he sounded like on the phone with dispatcher"
"Get outta here.... before I start firing EVERYONE"
"Luv ya too"

So, I got out to stir up some trouble amongst the populace for a few hours and return to the shop sometime after lunch and notice a marked insurance company car parked behind the one-legged DUImobile.
Touching base with everyone in the office, it seems the owner of the car has sent the insurance adjustor over to write up a report on how bad the damage is and get back to him.
Because he wasn't the one driving it last night.
His mechanic was.

Yeah, he gave the car to his mechanic friend to do some kind of work on it, mechanic friend proceeded to get drunk, crash, and yadda yadda yadda..... that's where I came in. Oh, and when he fessed up to his friend that the car was damaged, he tried to pin the damage ON US from the tow....

Somehow, it gets better, and you're going to swear I'm making this up... but.... the "mechanic friend" who did this?
Anyone remember this guy? - http://www.customerssuck.com/board/s...d.php?t=107350
IT
WAS
HIM!!!!!



Mama Mia, that's a SPICY load of karma....

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