Dance With the Devil

[Princess-Snake]

I like to sing when I work. Some people think I'm really good at it, some people think that I ought to make a career at it, and others have a headache and ask that I sing quietly. The type of song I sing depends on my mood. Today my ex-boyfriend from several years back called me (again) and asked me to reconsider getting back with him (again.) Like I really want to get back to that cheating scumbag who kept telling me I'd regret it if I broke up with him. But I digress...

So naturally, I'm in a vengeful mood so I sing vengeful songs. No one was in my line when I started singing dance with the devil by Breaking Benjamin. I was singing these lyrics in particular:
"Say good-bye
As we dance with the devil tonight
Don't you dare look into his eyes
As we dance with the devil tonight"
when suddenly out of nowhere this lady comes up and yells at me. She told me that my soul was going to Hell for singing about Satan, (yes, she did say that) that I'm a sinner, I'm a Satanist, may I burn in Hell, and my God have mercy on my soul. A customer behind her says I sing great, and won't I sing another song? Then I sang:
"And it's so easy when you're evil
This is the life you see
The devil tips his hat to me
I do it all because I'm evil
And I do it all for free
Your tears are all the pay I'll ever need."
She walked out in a huffy in the middle of the chorus, then being the sinner I am, I sang louder so she could hear me.

That same day, I'm still in a foul mood so I sing The Cell Block Tango by the six merry murders of the Cook County Jail from the movie Chicago. I'm singing about the wife who killed her husband with a knife (oops, I mean he ran into her knife ten times) when this guy walks up and says that I must have something against men if I'm so heartless for singing an anti-guy song. He then calls me a prissy, snobby, little rich b*tch and he wouldn't be surprised if I didn't have a boyfriend or if I killed off my boyfriends. After his ranting, he walked towards the exit calling me a feminist b*tch and promptly walks right into the door sending him sprawling to the ground with his groceries strewn all over the floor. What can I say? "He had it coming!"

[Bloodsoul]

Wow... good think you weren't singing anything by the Dresden Dolls, eh? ^_^ Granted, that's a bit of a habit of mine, also, 'cept I sing terribly thus I just whisper the words. I don't even want to know what they'd do to me if I started singing "Banana Phone" all night.

[Posture Moll]

I don't even want to know what they'd do to me if I started singing "Banana Phone" all night.

I think Coin-Operated Boy would raise a few eyebrows as well!

[BookstoreEscapee]

One good thing about walking through a noisy warehouse to get to my office is no one can hear me sing...

Most rich b*tches don't work in the grocery store...looks like he met the real b*tch, anyway...Karma!

[dispatch]

awwwwwww, ya didn't even get to the good part! (I love voltaire)

[Misanthropical]

Thanks, Princess-Snake! I had never heard of Breaking Benjamin before, so I did a search and I love that song!

[Lil Bunny]

Ok luckily I had set my drink down before reading this. I so had the mental image of the guy walking into the door with the song playing in the background. Well done!!!!

*struts off humming "He had it coming"*

[fma_fanatic]

When I start humming "If I Only Had a Brain", those around me know it's probably not a good idea to bug me.

btw, love the av, Princess-Snake. Shame that Nick cancelled Danny Phantom *cries*

[Shironu-Akaineko]

One of my personal favorites to sing out loud at work is "The ultimate Showdown of Ultimate Destiny"

Other favorites are
"Do the Mario!"
"Canadian Idiot"
"Axel F"
"Bitches"

And anything else that would embarass the hell out of a normal girl in my town but I would sing wholeheartedly.

[TWOLF]

I like to change words
If I had a hammer
I'ld beat customer's in the morning
I'ld beat them in the evening
All over this land
It's a hammer of clubbing
It's a hammer of Joy
I'ld beat the parents who give their kids cell phones
All over this town

And never sing Why don't we get drunk and scr-w at work, apparntly people just don't want to picture that

[TWOLF]

btw no I don't sing that out loud or think it, it just helps me feel better after a 45 min call of being yelled at./

[Crazeyal]

Spring is here, a-suh-puh-ring is here.
Life is skittles and life is beer.
I think the loveliest time of the year is the spring.
I do, don't you? 'Course you do.
But there's one thing that makes spring complete for me,
And makes every Sunday a treat for me.

All the world seems in tune
On a spring afternoon,
When we're poisoning pigeons in the park.
Every Sunday you'll see
My sweetheart and me,
As we poison the pigeons in the park.

When they see us coming, the birdies all try an' hide,
But they still go for peanuts when coated with cyanide.
The sun's shining bright,
Everything seems all right,
When we're poisoning pigeons in the park.

We've gained notoriety,
And caused much anxiety
In the Audubon Society
With our games.
They call it impiety
And lack of propriety,
And quite a variety
Of unpleasant names.
But it's not against any religion
To want to dispose of a pigeon.

So if Sunday you're free,
Why don't you come with me,
And we'll poison the pigeons in the park.
And maybe we'll do
In a squirrel* or two,
While we're poisoning pigeons in the park.

We'll murder them all amid laughter and merriment,
Except for the few we take home to experiment.
My pulse will be quickenin'
With each drop of strych'nine
We feed to a pigeon.
(It just takes a smidgin!)
To poison a pigeon in the park.

[adarhysenthe]

Heh, I've heard the exact same things as you, Princess Snake. Though I sing along with the overhead radio. If I could choose the music I would totally put in Chicago, Voltaire and all those others just to make me happy.

You are now my hero. I wish I could work with you! We could do harmony!

[Gawdzillers]

So she told you to burn in Hell, and for God to have mercy on your soul?
Pick one, lady.

[Amethyst Hunter]

Would be even better if it was "Poisoning Customers In The Store"...!

BWAAHAHAHAHA!! Tom Lehrer!!

Too bad you couldn't have told that nosy old woman who said you were going to Hell "Oh yeah? And what's Jesus got to say about people like YOU with the ginormous plank in your eye who go around nitpicking other people, you sanctimonious dried-up old bag?!"