Funny sales/service chat transcript

[Wookie Bender XL]

Hello all, I'm new here and wanted to say how much I love the site. I work at an online motorsports parts and accessory store where I get paid to chat with people as a sales and back-up service rep. Every day I get people who greet me as "allen" even though it says quite clearly in the chat window that my name is Alan with a capital A, one l and a conspicuously absent e. I usually caopy and paste the good ones and email 'em to my wife, but this one really needs to be shared:

Alan - Sales Rep.: Before a Livechat operator can assist you, you will need to enter a complete & valid email address.
john johnson: hello
john johnson: jj2009us@______.com
Alan - Sales Rep.: Thank you, John.
Alan - Sales Rep.: How can I help you?
john johnson: i have ticket no
john johnson: LTK71020
Alan - Sales Rep.: Ok I see you need help.
Alan - Sales Rep.: How can I help you, sir?
john johnson: ok
john johnson: 1989 honda cb 400f cb 1
john johnson: i need fuel tank key made and back seat key made
Alan - Sales Rep.: Ah, I'm very sorry but a dealer will have to do that . Honda is very protective of their key codes for obvious reasons.
Alan - Sales Rep.: I wish I could help you.
john johnson: do u have locksmith for that
Alan - Sales Rep.: No, a dealer will have to do that, a locksmith would not have the key codes either.
Alan - Sales Rep.: Sorry sir.
john johnson: oh i see
john johnson: so i want to change it
Alan - Sales Rep.: I'm sorry?
john johnson: the fuel tank
john johnson: i want to change the fuel tank
john johnson: get a new one
john johnson: and the seat too
Alan - Sales Rep.: OK, we can help you with that, but the lock issue will have to be handled by a dealer.
Alan - Sales Rep.: Would you like me to find those parts?
john johnson: yes
john johnson: need new gas tank and need new seat too
Alan - Sales Rep.: Here's a link to the fuel tank schematic/parts list.
Alan - Sales Rep.: And here's the seat.
john johnson: ok
Alan - Sales Rep.: Is there anything else I can assist you with today?
john johnson: how much is it
Alan - Sales Rep.: That's all on the price list, just find the part number on the drawing and scroll down to the corresponding part on the list below for pricing and ordering.
john johnson: if i buy the seat wit the key too
Alan - Sales Rep.: You'll need your color code to be sure you order the correct seat.
Alan - Sales Rep.: and tank
Alan - Sales Rep.: What color is your machine?
john johnson: if i buy fuel tank it wit the key too
john johnson: red
Alan - Sales Rep.: No, as you can see on the drawings, the keys are sold seperately.
john johnson: and new key come wit both of them
john johnson: if i but both of them item
john johnson: if i buy
Alan - Sales Rep.: Honda lists this bike as only coming in Blue that year.
Alan - Sales Rep.: You'll have to speak with a Honda dealer to get the correct color code.
john johnson: if the key sold seperately
john johnson: it blue
john johnson: my back
Alan - Sales Rep.: You said it was red earlier.
john johnson: i paint my bike
Alan - Sales Rep.: Oh.
Alan - Sales Rep.: I see.
Alan - Sales Rep.: Yes, the keys are sold seperately.
john johnson: where i get the key how much is it
Alan - Sales Rep.: Number 22 is the filler with key.
Alan - Sales Rep.: On the tank schematic.
john johnson: yes
Alan - Sales Rep.: #5 on the seat schematic.
john johnson: yes
Alan - Sales Rep.: If you order those parts you will get a lock and a key.
Alan - Sales Rep.: The key will be cut already.
john johnson: ok
Alan - Sales Rep.: You can have a new key cut and the locks re-calibrated at a dealer.
john johnson: you mean seat and fuel tank key too
Alan - Sales Rep.: yes.
Alan - Sales Rep.: Please take a look at the schematics.
john johnson: how much is it
Alan - Sales Rep.: All the prices are on the schematics I sent you links too.
Alan - Sales Rep.: Just click on the underlined text.
john johnson: what number
john johnson: on seat
Alan - Sales Rep.: Please take a look at the schematic.
john johnson: 104245-001
john johnson: is that the one
john johnson: the key
Alan - Sales Rep.: yes, with the lock
john johnson: and key right
Alan - Sales Rep.: Yes, that's right
Alan - Sales Rep.: Sorry.
john johnson: it cost 53.96
Alan - Sales Rep.: Yes.
john johnson: ok
john johnson: and fuel tank
Alan - Sales Rep.: Please look on the schematic, it's number 22
john johnson: ok
john johnson: cap fuel filler wit key
Alan - Sales Rep.: Yes, that's right
john johnson: 130.00
Alan - Sales Rep.: Yes, that's correct.
john johnson: is that correct
john johnson: ok wit new key
Alan - Sales Rep.: Yes.
john johnson: what total all together
Alan - Sales Rep.: Please start the order for a total, sir.
Alan - Sales Rep.: You will get an itemized total before any payment information is required.
john johnson: ok
john johnson: what your phone number there
Alan - Sales Rep.: (555) 555-3177
john johnson: okay do they have a fax number there
Alan - Sales Rep.: Not for an order, sir, sorry
john johnson: ok
john johnson: do you do accept money order
Alan - Sales Rep.: No sir, just credit or debit card with credit card logo.
Alan - Sales Rep.: Sorry about that.
john johnson: oh okay how about a check
Alan - Sales Rep.: No sir, just credit or debit card with credit card logo.
john johnson: do u accept it
Alan - Sales Rep.: accept what?
john johnson: check
Alan - Sales Rep.: No sir, just credit or debit card with credit card logo.
john johnson: ok
Alan - Sales Rep.: Sorry about that.
john johnson: no problem
john johnson: visa only
Alan - Sales Rep.: We do accept visa, yes.
john johnson: ok
john johnson: so i have to go to the dealer get the key made up
Alan - Sales Rep.: Yes, that's correct.
john johnson: in honda dealer
Alan - Sales Rep.: Yes.
john johnson: oh okay thank u
Alan - Sales Rep.: You're welcome
Alan - Sales Rep.: Have a great weekend
john johnson: for sharing my time
Alan - Sales Rep.: No problem, sir.
Alan - Sales Rep.: Take care.

[sportsmom]

Just wow. That's all I can say about that guy.


*Just so you know, however, any locksmith worth their salt can make a key from scratch for a lock, key codes be damned. Hubby is a locksmith, he does it all the time.

[Wookie Bender XL]

*Just so you know, however, any locksmith worth their salt can make a key from scratch for a lock, key codes be damned. Hubby is a locksmith, he does it all the time.

Hmmm... thanks! I'll remember that for the next time

[air914]

Wow - i'm glad you could follow that conversation b/c between the bad grammer and bad spelling, I was a little lost...... oh and incomplete sentences don't help much either....

[protege]

I wonder if that guy inhaled the paint fumes when he repainted his bike...or currently inhales the *exhaust* fumes when he rides it. Just reading his side of things gave me a headache.

[LostMyMind]

*Just so you know, however, any locksmith worth their salt can make a key from scratch for a lock, key codes be damned. Hubby is a locksmith, he does it all the time.

reminds me of my Dad's major oops last week. He has a combination floor safe that bolted down. He lost his "combination" numbers. He said it took the locksmith 3 hours to drill through and open that safe.

But back on your comment, wouldn't it be easier to "change" the lock to a new key?

[sportsmom]

reminds me of my Dad's major oops last week. He has a combination floor safe that bolted down. He lost his "combination" numbers. He said it took the locksmith 3 hours to drill through and open that safe.

But back on your comment, wouldn't it be easier to "change" the lock to a new key?

I guess it depends on the lock, some cannot be rekeyed.

But, damn, three hours?!? What kind of safe is it?

[LostMyMind]

the locksmith couldn't find the maker either. But that's what I said too. The locksmith went through 3 drill bits to get through it too.

I hear tales of 5/10 mins to break a safe, but I guess that one isn't on the list. I'm with you, I want to know who made that safe.