I am never having children.

[blas]

This woman was stupid enough to believe that her daughter wouldn't find the phone that she hid on her? Is she DUMB?

Newsflash....

I spent nearly 13 out of 18 years grounded. In all fairness, my mom didn't start grounding me until I was 5. She tried to hide EVERYTHING on me, and yet, I found everything she hid on me!

She hid my Barbie dolls when I was between 5-8. I ALWAYS found them.

She unplugged my TV in my bedroom when I was 14 and unplugged the coaxial cable and hid it in the BATHROOM CLOSET. I plugged it back in and found the cable and reinserted it. Removed it before she came home.

She hid my carkeys when I was grounded and not working or at school. I found them in the MEDICINE cabinet!

She tried to hide the tracphone under her bed. This was an accidental finding, because I was trying to get Baby to come out from under the bed and I found it laying next to her.

If kids want something, they WILL find it. You wanna hide something from your kid? Bury it.

[Imogene]

You wanna hide something from your kid? Bury it.

Two things:
1)That explains NASA's intent on the rover they sent to Mars which, as Robin Williams so eloquently put it, "F*cker buried!"
2) All burying things does is adds a second step to 'finding' things: Take bath.

[Ree]

Manditory, legally requiring 10-year-old girls to have their tubes tied. They cannot get un-tied until they are 19 and have 1. graduated high school and 2. passed a parenting class/final test. That's the way to make sure crap like that doesn't happen.

If only we had a forum for discussing stuff like that... Hmmm...if only....oh...wait a minute...what's this here link on the front page of the site?
What's this here "Fratching!" thing?

[blas]

I don't think that's medically safe anyway...

Oh, oh, I forgot to add....

Dad was smarter than mom when it came to hiding things.

When I kept finding my car keys, guess what dad did? Disconnected the battery cables.

[Pedersen]

When I kept finding my car keys, guess what dad did? Disconnected the battery cables.

I've got one on that one that scares me: I had a friend nicknamed "McFly". McFly had a future as a mechanic. Basically, if it had an engine, he could make it work. Unfortunately, he screwed up, badly. Even after he fixed that, a different accident cost him his life. I'll put that story somewhere if people actually want it.

He is the focus here. Remember him being a mechanic? Well, he decided to play a prank on a mutual friend: He pulled the distributor cap out of said friend's car, and to watch the expression on said friend's face when car failed to start (btw, we were in high school, so immature pranks were quite normal).

McFly got the freak out of his life, though. Friend's car still started. And McFly never did have an explanation as to why.

For non-mechanics in the audience: While I don't know the specifics, I do know that the distributor cap is (more or less) the center of a car's electrical system. No cap, no electric. Period. That car should not have been able to start, not at all. And no one I've ever met has even had a theory as to why it did.

[Sliceanddice]

see its storys like this who make me wanna move to italy or something (none america basically) and raise kids there

[AnqeiicDemise]

So, I'm reading this post and I turn to my husband and say

"that's it. I'm having my tubes tied."

To which he turns to me and says "nope. We're having kids... we're just going to beat the snot out of the disrespectful little snots.....or eat them. That'll bring a whole new meaning to 'I brought you into this world and I can bring you back where you came from!' "



/end side note

In regards to the CC usage, the only times I used it as a kid in my mom's house was to verify internet access...like when I forgot my password to my aol account (hey, I was twelve!) and forgot the password to hers. (I was also the tech-advisor at home so I had access to her accounts. Parental protection? HAH, not at my place!)

I never, however, used her CC to make purchases without her specific consent or knowledge.

Dad would have killed me.

[Gravekeeper]

Wow, I could cross that gene pool in sandals and not get my toes wet.

Because God forbid I end up like one of THESE anuscakes. (props to GK!)

Glad to be of service. ^^

[counterjockey]

I can only imagine what Daddy must be like to complete that vision of a happy home. Anyway, I related the gist of that call to a lead, and was given ten minutes to go compose myself. I needed it.[/B]

I can imagine what Daddy's like. Daddy's like, "Fug this, I'm outta here!" Probably several years ago by this point. And while that may have only made things worse for the other two, I guess one has to give Daddy some props for self-preservation.

[EclipseDragon986]

I guess I understand why my parents seem to be constantly amazed that they raised a logical mild offspring and the worst I ever did to them was rebel at college

[OfficeSlug]

And yet people wonder why I am perfectly content remaining an uncle......

Sing it, brother!

I am the cool, hang-out aunt for a few hours, then I turn my niece back over to my sister...

[Misanthropical]

I usually have a stash of cookies that I hide, because those cookies are MINE and mine alone. The kids get a different set of cookies, so it's not like I don't try to make up for the fact they can't have mine.

Anyway, last night I counted that I had six cookies left. This morning I had to move the cookies to clean and can you guess how many were left? NONE!

I called my husband to complain that my cookies where gone and he told me that maybe I ate them, since he insists that I eat in my sleep. I pointed out that if I had eaten six cookies I would have been throwing up. If I try to eat more than one at a time I get sick.

So, that sealed the deal with me that my children found my cookies. They always seem to know where I hide chocolate. No matter how hard I try to hide it.

Anyway, I hope my husband picks me up some more on the way home.

[MystyGlyttyr]

I got into physical fights with my father AND mother as a child. My mom always won. Hands down. (They weren't real fights, though, just playful wrestling.)

I would try to fight with her these days, too, but I'm pretty sure she can still take me down. 56, one kidney, bad heart nothing. She's still ten times meaner than me.

[Silvercat]

So, that sealed the deal with me that my children found my cookies. They always seem to know where I hide chocolate. No matter how hard I try to hide it.

Get a box with a lock and keep the key around your neck?

[DGoddessChardonnay]

Get a box with a lock and keep the key around your neck?

If her kids are like me and my brother were, they'll find a way to open the box.

Mom couldn't hide anything from us either . . . the harder she tried to hide it, the easier it was for US to discover it.

Nope, wasn't me Mom . . . talk to your son