Uuuuuuuum...

[Giggle Goose]

....I'm pretty quick on my feet, but I still, for the life of me, could not have come up with any kind of witty remark for this guy. I just got off my shift and came here immediately before I forgot to post about it.

It's this family of five, with one young kid. They're a fun group, laughing and joking around. I figured I could handle it. So the wife tells me: "Do you like his shirt?", pointing at her husband, who has a small hole in the chest area. I said: "Well, it's not like we're a fancy place or anything, it's cool." Then he pulls it down to expose his nipple and he says: "It's my nipple shirt. So I'm ready to be milked at any time." I kind of just laughed and said "Uhhhhh...." while the family joked around about how they were scaring the poor waitress.

Looking back, I think it's hilarious, but I was truly at a loss for words. It's all good, they tipped me 25%, so perhaps the end justifies the means here.

[Kiwi]

I didnt realise you can milk old goats....

[garth1]

I've always wanted to get on a bus or elevator with my brother, and start saying things like, " I can't believe how little they pay the humans on this planet", or something like that just to see what people will do.

[DarthRetard]

"Oh sure, you can milk anything with nipples!"
"I have nipples Greg, can you milk me?"

[Jadedcarguy]

"Oh sure, you can milk anything with nipples!"
"I have nipples Greg, can you milk me?"

You a pothead, Focker?

[Imogene]

" I can't believe how little they pay the humans on this planet",

I tend to do similar, only not with words. I do it with clothes. "WTF? What is she wearing? Is that a Guy Fawkes mask?"
I do things intentionally to pull people out of their little rut.
"Do you have any questions?" at an interview is never a good idea when I'm around.
"Oh, hell yes. Why is Tarzan never portrayed with a beard? Hot dog buns, packages of 8, hot dogs, packs of ten? " etc.

[Becks]

Then he pulls it down to expose his nipple and he says: "It's my nipple shirt. So I'm ready to be milked at any time."

I probably would've backed away as quickly as I could.

:shudder:

[Sliceanddice]

lol i think the tortoga twins have another nipple buddy out there

[Geek King]

I've always wanted to get on a bus or elevator with my brother, and start saying things like, " I can't believe how little they pay the humans on this planet", or something like that just to see what people will do.

Heh...I hate to admit it (almost), but I used to walk up to complete strangers in the mall, look them in the eye, and say, "I know what is going on, but I'm not allowed to tell you. Too many eyes here." Then I'd walk off. Then the Matrix came along and ruined it for me.

[RecoveringKinkoid]

lol i think the tortoga twins have another nipple buddy out there

Heheeheh.....Renfaire?

[Sliceanddice]

yeah, still funny.

[mariamousie1]

I think he just wanted your reaction. I've met weird people like that.

[JustaCashier]

"Do you have any questions?" at an interview is never a good idea when I'm around.
"Oh, hell yes. Why is Tarzan never portrayed with a beard? Hot dog buns, packages of 8, hot dogs, packs of ten? " etc.

A buddy of mine I worked with years ago, would tell of when he and his wife would tour a local winery where a friend of theirs was a guide.

At the point of where the friend/guide would ask if there were any questions, my buddy would ask something like "Is it true that a dog's saliva is cleaner than a human's?"

Mike

[Killer Bees]

I'm not usually stumped for words either. If I'm taken by surprise, I usually just say, "awesome" and change the subject.