4am in the morning people. GO TO BED, STOP LOITERING in the lobby.
"Is there any place I can smoke? I dont want to stay outside its too cold"
DUDE, seriously, you asked for a nonsmoking room, and you want to smoke NOW? why didn't you get a SMOKING ROOM IN THE FIRST FUCKING PLACE?
OR BETTER YET. QUIT SMOKING might help.
"WTF, THIS IS BULLSHIT, YOU ARE SENDING ME TO ANOTHER HOTEL? I HAVE A GUARANTEED RESERVATION IN HERE"
BITCH, did you read the fucking reservation, your first night is on us if we cant guarantee your room. you are getting a free night anyway, why bitching, you are just not staying in OUR hotel. the more you rant the longer it takes for you get to the other hotel you dumb bitch. get over it.
"But I requested a late check out"
NO ONE TOLD YOU your requested was granted, so we are charging you a full day for checking out after 8pm.
"No one told me there is a charge for late check out"
DUDE. you occupied the room for a day. without letting us know you were planning to check out this late.... I couldnt sell the room after you check out. I am charging you one way or the other.
"I am requesting an early checkin"
DUDE, if you need the room that bad why didnt come a day early, or better yet, made the reservation a day early, and call ahead to pay for an extra night to keep your room, so you can CHECK IN early.
WAIT. you are too cheap to do that.
When you are lost in town and trying to get back to the hotel, PLEASE PULL OVER AND STOP, AND TELL ME EXACTLY WHERE YOU ARE. IF YOU ARE KEEP DRIVING I WOULDNT BE ABLE TO PIN POINT WHERE YOU ARE, and GUIDE YOU BACK HERE.
AND FUCKING STOP TALKING WHILE I AM TALKING TO YOU.
"How do you turn the lights off?"
There is a switch.... are you blind?
"There is something wrong with my tv, but I dont want engineering to come to the room. Its fuzzy, can you fix it for me?"
Let me get this straight, you want ME to fix it. but you dont want an engineer go to your room to check and fix it..... What am I? Magician?
"I need some girlie stuff... you know... girl stuff, do you have any available in the back or housekeeping?"
I cannot read your mind. I am a guy, I USE GUYS stuffs, not sure what girlie stuffs are. be more specific.
"Why do I have to show you my ID in order to get a room key"
DUDE. its for your security, you want some stranger walk into your room?
"Why cant the pizza delivery guy come up to my room for delivery?"
DUDE. its for your security, you want the pizza guy to rob you or rape you?
"Got any other places we are can go and get a few more drinks?"
DUDE, its 3am in the morning, everything is closed, go to bed. you really want to drink til you drop? I wish you miss your meeting or flight in the morning with your stupidity.
"Is there any place I can smoke? I dont want to stay outside its too cold"
DUDE, seriously, you asked for a nonsmoking room, and you want to smoke NOW? why didn't you get a SMOKING ROOM IN THE FIRST FUCKING PLACE?
OR BETTER YET. QUIT SMOKING might help.
"WTF, THIS IS BULLSHIT, YOU ARE SENDING ME TO ANOTHER HOTEL? I HAVE A GUARANTEED RESERVATION IN HERE"
BITCH, did you read the fucking reservation, your first night is on us if we cant guarantee your room. you are getting a free night anyway, why bitching, you are just not staying in OUR hotel. the more you rant the longer it takes for you get to the other hotel you dumb bitch. get over it.
"But I requested a late check out"
NO ONE TOLD YOU your requested was granted, so we are charging you a full day for checking out after 8pm.
"No one told me there is a charge for late check out"
DUDE. you occupied the room for a day. without letting us know you were planning to check out this late.... I couldnt sell the room after you check out. I am charging you one way or the other.
"I am requesting an early checkin"
DUDE, if you need the room that bad why didnt come a day early, or better yet, made the reservation a day early, and call ahead to pay for an extra night to keep your room, so you can CHECK IN early.
WAIT. you are too cheap to do that.
When you are lost in town and trying to get back to the hotel, PLEASE PULL OVER AND STOP, AND TELL ME EXACTLY WHERE YOU ARE. IF YOU ARE KEEP DRIVING I WOULDNT BE ABLE TO PIN POINT WHERE YOU ARE, and GUIDE YOU BACK HERE.
AND FUCKING STOP TALKING WHILE I AM TALKING TO YOU.
"How do you turn the lights off?"
There is a switch.... are you blind?
"There is something wrong with my tv, but I dont want engineering to come to the room. Its fuzzy, can you fix it for me?"
Let me get this straight, you want ME to fix it. but you dont want an engineer go to your room to check and fix it..... What am I? Magician?
"I need some girlie stuff... you know... girl stuff, do you have any available in the back or housekeeping?"
I cannot read your mind. I am a guy, I USE GUYS stuffs, not sure what girlie stuffs are. be more specific.
"Why do I have to show you my ID in order to get a room key"
DUDE. its for your security, you want some stranger walk into your room?
"Why cant the pizza delivery guy come up to my room for delivery?"
DUDE. its for your security, you want the pizza guy to rob you or rape you?
"Got any other places we are can go and get a few more drinks?"
DUDE, its 3am in the morning, everything is closed, go to bed. you really want to drink til you drop? I wish you miss your meeting or flight in the morning with your stupidity.
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