Cheapskate SC's...ahh the joy!

[Athena]

I work at the local service station where i live. You wouldn't believe the whinging that goes on about fuel prices. It's gotten to the stage where people will stop me in the street (out of uniform on my days off) and continue the rant.
Idiot: "When's fuel prices coming down?"
Me: "I don't know. It's got nothing to do with me, head office does all that. I just do what i'm told."
Idiot: "Well at least YOU get it at a discount."
Me: "No i don't. I have to pay the same prices you do. To be honest it doesn't really bother me."
Idiot: "What? It doesn't bother you that you have to pay a dollar fifty a liter for fuel?"
Me: "Actually it's a dollar sixty for me, i buy Ultimate. I try not to worry about the things i can't change. Saves stress.
Idiot: (Smacked fish expression) "Oh."
I mean honestly, you'd think they'd get the idea after the hundredth time. I DON"T SET PRICES!

[Rapscallion]

I had quite a number of cheap SCs, but there is one that really sticks in my mind. It was in the early days when we didn't want to offend people.

A little old lady came in and wanted a stick of celery. We only sold it in the bunch - that's how it came, and that's how it sold. Celery is easy - just cut the bottom off and stick it in a jar of water to keep it. Easy enough, right?

"But I only need one stick for a salad," she protested.

After a bit of to-ing and fro-ing with the Boss, he said "No" and drove off to the bank.

"I think he's mean," she complained.

Well, it takes one to know one.

Rapscallion

[Rapscallion]

Oooh - just remembered this one.

The newsagent next to us had accounts for people. They got their papers delivered and, in an ideal world, came to pay their bill every so often. Most people paid theirs every week.

I was standing in line to buy a chocolate bar, idly listening to the conversation in front of me.

"How much do I owe on my newspaper account?" a fur-clad human prune asked.

The assistant checked. "The last six weeks," she said.

"In that case, I'll pay up to two weeks ago," the being swathed in fur said, pulling out a thick wad of notes.

Rapscallion

[repsac]

just a dollar fifty?

Sorry, had to get that off my chest. Me, I've had those cheapskates, though I think the best was a lady I had when I worked returns.

SC (stupid customer): "you didn't give me enough back."

Me: (checks receipt.) "Yeah, I got it. five fourty. Yeah, that's right."

SC: "But, I paid twenty dollars. Where's the rest of the money?"

Me: (thought) Oh lord...you've gotta be kidding me.

Me: Ma'am, You kept some of the stuff. I can only give you back what that thing is worth.

SC: But I paid with a twenty. I want my twenty.

Me: (Nicely) Ma'am, what did you bring back. (she holds up the one item) Yeah, and what does it say it costs on that receipt. (Rattles off the price). Good. Now, why should I give you twenty dollars back for something you kept?

SC: But I paid with a twenty.

Me: (audible) "Will you just go away. You're not getting it back."

Manager: (who had snuck up on me.) "I'd do as he says Miss. Oh, and don't let the door get you on the way out.