A quick background: I work a call center; I'm an answering service for a couple thousand different businesses in the Maryland/DC/Virginia area. Half of wich are property management companies. So when someone's boiler blows, or the heater is shooting cold air, I get to be the guy who bugs maintenance for you.
Now, I just recently started working over nights, 10p-6:30a. I fly solo for the latter half of the shift and it's normally pretty quiet after 3 or so. Now then, the guy before me that used to do this would get a call every night from 'Crazy Mary' who is noted on the acct as a person with mental issues and to disregard her phone calls. He was the only operator that she would ever talk to, normally hanging up if some one else answered.
Well, I guess I picked up the mantle. Here are a couple experpts from tonight. So far, three calls and counting. Not perfectly remembered, slightly paraphrased.
LL: Lady Loony, ala Crazy Mary
ME: Everyone puts this, I thought I should too.
ME: Thank you for calling ABC management, what property are you calling for please?
LL: Yes, the police and fire department just dragged some one out of building C.
ME: Oh.. was it one of the tenants?
LL: No, some bum sleeping in the hallway. That's expensive you know, like 8,000 dollars to call the fire department out here, don'tcha think?
ME: Well, I don't deal with that directly, but that's a lot, yes.
LL: It'd just be cheaper to higher a security guard, don'tcha think?
ME: It probably would ma'am, yes.
LL: So?
ME: I'll let ABC know that the police dragged some one out of the apartment.
LL: No! Not my apartment, the hallway, downstairs!
Me: Yes, the apartment building.
LL: No one is in my apartment, I lock the door.
ME: That's probably for the best. I'll let ABC know what happened.
LL: And there were two hispanics that don't live here in the laundry room at 5am. I think they were drug dealers. ABC should really do something.
ME: I'll tell them.
LL: Ok then. *click*
This is my first real conversation with the woman, previously I had spoken with her just long enough to put her on hold for our previous overnighter. He said it was a good sign she didn't hang up on me for even that. Sure it was. Anyway, about 15 minutes go by...
Me: (I see ABC Management show up and prepare for the worst) ABC Mngt, how may I help you?
LL: There's nobody in my apartment!
ME: (preparations failed) .. Y-yes, that's good.
LL: I don't let anyone in my apartment. Except that one time when a neighbor dropped off some food for me, but that was it!
ME: Is there anything I can help you with?
LL: We need security in this building. I saw two black people earlier, they looked suspicious to me. It cost 8,000 dollars for the fire department to come out and remove them!
ME: I don't really think-
LL: It'd be so much cheaper to get an overnight security guard, don'tcha think?
ME: (sigh) It probably would.
LL: I don't let anyone into my apartment.
ME: So I've been told.
LL: Ok then. *click*
And thus another 10 or so minutes passby with less inanity. ABC comes up again, I ignore it for a while, preferring to handle some other messages that haven't been dispatched yet. By the time I'm done, she's still waiting. How could I dissapoint?
ME: ABC, HMIHY?
LL: Hi, it's me. There's no one in my apartment.
ME: ...
LL: If anything happens, ABC would be liable for millions you know!
ME: If anything happens?
LL: The other day, the guy upstairs had a machete, and threatened the security guard! (note during this conversation I heard her TV on in the background running a commercial for butcher knives)
ME: And was he arrested?
LL: A police report was made. Didn't ABC know?
ME: I'm sure they do if the security guard filed a report.
LL: If anyone gets hurt, ABC is reliable, could cost them millions!
ME: I'll be sure to warn them.
LL: I lock MY apartment.
ME: That's a good idea, should keep you safe.
LL: I'M NOT SAFE! That guy had a machete! He could hurt me, and I'd sue ABC for millions!
ME: I'll be sure to ask for a night security guard to save us all the hassle.
LL: Thank you! *click*
Now, I just recently started working over nights, 10p-6:30a. I fly solo for the latter half of the shift and it's normally pretty quiet after 3 or so. Now then, the guy before me that used to do this would get a call every night from 'Crazy Mary' who is noted on the acct as a person with mental issues and to disregard her phone calls. He was the only operator that she would ever talk to, normally hanging up if some one else answered.
Well, I guess I picked up the mantle. Here are a couple experpts from tonight. So far, three calls and counting. Not perfectly remembered, slightly paraphrased.
LL: Lady Loony, ala Crazy Mary
ME: Everyone puts this, I thought I should too.
ME: Thank you for calling ABC management, what property are you calling for please?
LL: Yes, the police and fire department just dragged some one out of building C.
ME: Oh.. was it one of the tenants?
LL: No, some bum sleeping in the hallway. That's expensive you know, like 8,000 dollars to call the fire department out here, don'tcha think?
ME: Well, I don't deal with that directly, but that's a lot, yes.
LL: It'd just be cheaper to higher a security guard, don'tcha think?
ME: It probably would ma'am, yes.
LL: So?
ME: I'll let ABC know that the police dragged some one out of the apartment.
LL: No! Not my apartment, the hallway, downstairs!
Me: Yes, the apartment building.
LL: No one is in my apartment, I lock the door.
ME: That's probably for the best. I'll let ABC know what happened.
LL: And there were two hispanics that don't live here in the laundry room at 5am. I think they were drug dealers. ABC should really do something.
ME: I'll tell them.
LL: Ok then. *click*
This is my first real conversation with the woman, previously I had spoken with her just long enough to put her on hold for our previous overnighter. He said it was a good sign she didn't hang up on me for even that. Sure it was. Anyway, about 15 minutes go by...
Me: (I see ABC Management show up and prepare for the worst) ABC Mngt, how may I help you?
LL: There's nobody in my apartment!
ME: (preparations failed) .. Y-yes, that's good.
LL: I don't let anyone in my apartment. Except that one time when a neighbor dropped off some food for me, but that was it!
ME: Is there anything I can help you with?
LL: We need security in this building. I saw two black people earlier, they looked suspicious to me. It cost 8,000 dollars for the fire department to come out and remove them!
ME: I don't really think-
LL: It'd be so much cheaper to get an overnight security guard, don'tcha think?
ME: (sigh) It probably would.
LL: I don't let anyone into my apartment.
ME: So I've been told.
LL: Ok then. *click*
And thus another 10 or so minutes passby with less inanity. ABC comes up again, I ignore it for a while, preferring to handle some other messages that haven't been dispatched yet. By the time I'm done, she's still waiting. How could I dissapoint?
ME: ABC, HMIHY?
LL: Hi, it's me. There's no one in my apartment.
ME: ...
LL: If anything happens, ABC would be liable for millions you know!
ME: If anything happens?
LL: The other day, the guy upstairs had a machete, and threatened the security guard! (note during this conversation I heard her TV on in the background running a commercial for butcher knives)
ME: And was he arrested?
LL: A police report was made. Didn't ABC know?
ME: I'm sure they do if the security guard filed a report.

LL: If anyone gets hurt, ABC is reliable, could cost them millions!
ME: I'll be sure to warn them.
LL: I lock MY apartment.
ME: That's a good idea, should keep you safe.
LL: I'M NOT SAFE! That guy had a machete! He could hurt me, and I'd sue ABC for millions!
ME: I'll be sure to ask for a night security guard to save us all the hassle.
LL: Thank you! *click*

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