rude comments on appearance

[BaristaTrav]

over the past few weeks, i've been receiving more and more (maybe well intended, or maybe not, i really don't care, choose something ELSE to start a conversation with me, please) comments on how 'tired' i look. this can be contributed to dark circles around my eyes (genetic, and not a damned thing i can do about it, thanks for reminding me about one of MANY things i don't like about my appearance, asshat.), which no amount of concealer hides, apparently, because it seems it's visible, and therefore, fair game for those who cannot engage their brain before their mouth activates.

i'm to the point where i'm going to stop biting my tongue and start hurting THEIR feelings over this type of rudeness. not an ideal solution, so i think after the holidays are over, i will ask for some vacation time to get away from the store and reconsider a few things, because i've had it with this type of rudeness and insensitivity from the greater population.

i almost responded to one of these 'geniuses' with the below, but managed to clamp my jaw shut in time:

'tired? no; tired of idiots, YES.'

sorry for the bitchy rant, but i've had more than enough of this type of crap.

I also have the dark circles, regardless of whether I'm actually tired or not. I always get the: " You work here, how can you be tired!!??" line. Like, yea, just becuase I work here automatically means I drink 8 or 9 cups of coffee during my shift.

[Record Store Tough Guy]

I had a black eye for a week from sparring with one of the black belts.

I was very disappointed no one said anything about it.

[Becks]

It's nice to know that someone else has the dark circles; I didn't realize it could be hereditary. No one ever says anything to me about it, but I notice it, and I think it shows up more with makeup. Even when I get enough sleep, they don't go away. Sometimes it looks like I got smacked in the eye and the bruise is almost gone...

That's me...EXACTLY.

I almost don't care anymore, really.

I'm pretty much resigned to it...but the guys at work say I look better with my glasses off... I think they LIKE seeing it. I work with real weird people.

[chainedbarista]

ah, raieth, that was a gem!

unfortunately, i'm closer to a volcanic eruption that a well phrased insult at this point...gah; stinking stress, gotta love that little monkeywrench.

*deep breaths, deep CLEANSING breaths*

[Kyree]

I have the dark circles around my eyes too.

About a year ago, I had gotten the news that my grandmother had died. I didn't sleep very well that night. But the next day I went to work anyways. I'll admit, I looked like hell.

I had a customer come up and tell me "You know, you should really hold off on the smoking until you're off work. Coming to work high isn't very professional."

[Miffed]

I often get annoying middle schoolers making remarks about my skinny physique at work. One girl just wouldn't let it go. How old are you? really? I don't believe you. You look small.


One of my friends at volleyball practice wouldn't stop until I finally let him have it. "Really? you don't think I've ever noticed I'm underweight? You think you're the first person to notice? do you think your the only person to have ever pointed out my apparent lack body fat!?"

His reply, "Well sorry, I just thought no one ever told you."

"As if that justifies it!? What makes you think you need to notify me of my own body's appearance, as if I never looked in a mirror?"


Yes I'm skinny, but I'm not weak. I think he was just trying to put me down due to my being able to do the V-ball exercises relatively easy.

[erinn]

This happened a long time ago when I was working in retail at a card shop.

Anyway, I have a mild birth defect called "Hemifacial Microsoma" which means that in utero, one side of my face did not develop as the other half did. It's a very mild case, fortunately, and hardly noticeable, unless of course, you happen to be a complete SC at a card shop. The most noticeable aspect of my case is the asymmetry of my eyebrows. Because one of my eye socket is actually a tad smaller than the other, my eyebrows are uneven. There is nothing I can do about this except maybe have plastic surgery which I can't afford really.

So I was checking customers out, and this guy came up to the register. I smiled and said "Hi" *insert generic customer service greeting here* and his response was to point at my uneven eyebrow and say, "You went a little wild with that one, eh?" As if I just went a little crazy with the tweezers... as if it had nothing to do with a birth defect that I have no control over.

Ok, so I am just dumbfounded by this jerk, and trying not to hack him to death by papercuts (the sides of greeting cards can draw blood you know). I waited for an apology or an "Oh I'm sorry, I shouldn't have been such a rude and spiteful person." But no, he just stares at me, unemotional - like a robot. I just stared at him in disbelief and continued to ring him up. When it was over I just stared at him until he left.

Wow.

[iradney]

Gotten all those too..... Enough so to come up with a few retorts.

What's the weather like up there?
Clear, but I'm getting tired of having to dodge satellites.

How tall are you?
Get me a ruler long enough and I'll tell you.

Do you play basketball?
Are you a jockey?

Have you always been that tall?
Nope. When I was 6 I accidentally took a bath in hot water and shrunk.

Have you gotten taller?
No, it's the heels. (Note: As a guy, I obviously don't own anything with a raised heel.)

TTO just says

"No, you're a midget"

Not politically correct, I know, but he gets sick of it after a while.

[sarahj]

I'm very pale, and though I admit I'm very cute in a bikini, I'm bright white all over. I find it more funny than embarrassing, though. Anyway, I tend to get "you have really nice skin, stay out of the sun" more than "get a tan." Odd.

[Pezzle]

Didn't know pimples could be stress related. I clean my face, and cut out soda! Yet, I have a cluster of 10 bumps on the top of my head, more on my cheeks and nose, and some narsty ones on my chin!

Must be the holidays.

And yeah I get comments on my appearance by really stupid nasty customers who dont' think a fat person knows that they're fat and trying to get rid of said fat. As one nice man from haiti referred to me as: That fat white bitch in computers.

[IHateStupidCustomers]

Have any of you have an SC basically call you fat?

I worked in a shoe department, and someone else was working the register and I was doing busy work and stocking floor displays. I ask these guys trying on shoes if they were finding everything okay, etc. They were fine. I don't think they bought anything. Apparently this guy had seen me in the store before, because the next time I walked by, the guy goes. "Putting on some weight, aren't you?"

"Uh....I don't know." I wasn't about to deal with this guy. I start to walk away.
"How do you not know if you've gained weight?"
I give him a death stare and turn around to go to the stockroom to cry a little.
I had gained maybe 5 or 10 pounds, but it was mostly from medication. And I just could not believe the nerve of that guy!

[RecoveringKinkoid]

You know, this is gonna sound weird, but some guys flirt like that.

They make disparaging comments like that, get you good and empty of confidence, then hit on you. The mindeset being that at that point, you ought to be desperate and thankful for a little male attention.

I've seen it time and time again. A few of the profoundly stupid ones actually tried it on me (and got a woman openly laughing in their faces for their trouble).

How many times have you seen abusive men say things like "you should be thankful to have someone like me, most men wouldn't find you attractive" ?

We had a guy in the scene shop that was like that. He used to say things like "You'd be more attractive if you'd lose some weight." He said this to me when I was in my early 20's, weighed 117 pounds, and had a figure that literally caused accidents. I just deadpanned back "You'd be more attractive if you were someone else." Nice try, asshole.

Pig.

How gross.

[BaristaGirl]

I am VERY self-conscious about my weight, and when people do things, like, for example, ask if I'm pregnant, it really really doesn't help. I've worked so hard on my appearance; I'm buying nicer clothes, starting to wear a little makeup, I've (thankfully, finally!) got most of my acne under control, got a really sexy haircut,but it's just not good enough for these people. It's so depressing.

[GingerBiscuit]

Not me, but an ex colleauge- who was gorgeous, tall and naturally model-slim once got a customer asking her if she ate.
She also used to get older women going.
'goodness, How much do you weigh? Do you eat? You'll never have children if you don't EAT you know.'

The one time anyone asked me a similar question I responded with 'No, I don't eat. I photosynthesise."

[Boozy]

I just deadpanned back "You'd be more attractive if you were someone else."

Congratulations, RK. I'm not one to laugh out loud much, but this one made me break rule number 1 for the first time since I joined.