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wherein I teach an SC to not be an SC

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  • wherein I teach an SC to not be an SC

    This is not quite as good as my “I need a cape” thread, but I like it. Since then I have been emboldened to change the world one bad person at a time.

    I was back at my favorite McDonalds…I don’t know why, I think it has something to do with the $50 gift card they gave me. I was with my wife, we were shopping and wanted a snack. There were two lines leading to the counter. We were in the right line, in the line to our left was a woman with a child. She looked about 30ish, with about a 5-7 year old. The kid was pitching a FIT. She wanted a toy, she wanted to go play, she wanted juice, she wanted to leave, she wanted fries, she wanted to climb up on the counter and get the toys out of the display. She was screaming at the top of her lungs every time she inhaled about what she wanted. The mom was standing there like a pole, completely oblivious to the torture of those of us within earshot. We stepped up to the counter a step ahead of her.

    The 50something woman cashier at the counter gave me an apologetic look when the child degenerated from screaming what she wanted to just a glass breaking screech. She said “what can I do for you today.” I looked over at the woman and down at her child with a scornful glare. The woman looked at me with a “what, I don’t understand” look. I turned back to the cashier and said “well…since it looks to be too late for birth control, I would suggest adoption.” The cashier started laughing and had to cover her mouth with her hand.

    The woman grabbed her child an pulled her in front of her and told her to shush. It did not work. She looked at me and said “She just does not listen.”

    Me: Mind if I show you a trick?

    Woman: (Eagerly nodding her head) Yes!

    I crouched down and got myself on the kid’s eye level.

    Me: Hey, stop that. You don’t hear anyone else being loud do you? This is not a place to be loud. You have to be quiet inside. (girl just stood there with a doe in headlights look). Do you like French fries?

    Girl: (nods bashfully)

    Me: and you like to play in the playland don’t you?

    Girl: (smiles and nods bigger)

    Me: because I’m pretty sure your mom is going to buy you a happy meal with some French fries, and after you eat you can go play in the playland. But, the playland is only for kids that are being good and being quiet. If you are good and quiet and eat all of your lunch, I bet your mom will let you play in the playland.

    The girl looked up at her mom with a “can we PLEEEAAASSSSSEEEE” look, kind of bouncing up an down. The mom nodded and said yes. The kid stood there silently smiling while we placed our orders. Both cashiers looked at me like I was some sort of Kid Whisperer.

    The woman and her kid came and sat two tables over from us. Every time the kid would start talking louder and louder she would look at me, and I would do the finger over lips shhh (without the sound). She would smile, quiet down, look at the playland, then look back at me and smile. She scarfed down her lunch and her mom let her into the playland. She came back and said thank you, it was the first quiet she had in a while.

    I gave her my secrets, get on eye level, tell them what you want in a calm voice, and why. Give them something that you will take away if they are bad. Giving them rewards for behavior leads to them only doing things for rewards. Threatening to take things away has a much better result in the long run, but be prepared to follow thru.

    So. After this little incident there are some Pro’s and some Con’s.

    Pro: Hopefully I re-inspired the mom to be a better parent. One less nasty customer for everyone to have to deal with.

    Con: The Uber parenting skill has turned my wife baby crazy. I think I may have to punch a puppy to nip this in the bud.

  • #2
    Quoth bob the goat View Post
    So. After this little incident there are some Pro’s and some Con’s.

    Pro: Hopefully I re-inspired the mom to be a better parent. One less nasty customer for everyone to have to deal with.

    Con: The Uber parenting skill has turned my wife baby crazy. I think I may have to punch a puppy to nip this in the bud.
    You forgot another Pro... the side-effects of having a wife that really wants to make a baby. Ne?

    Oh, and yes, you're maintaining your perfect 10/10 with this very nicely.
    ...WHY DO YOU TEMPT WHAT LITTLE FAITH IN HUMANITY I HAVE!?! -- Kalga
    And I want a pony for Christmas but neither of us is getting what we want OK! What you are asking is impossible. -- Wicked Lexi

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    • #3
      you can always 'practice' until you get it right...
      look! it's ghengis khan!
      Sorry, but while I can do many things, extracting heads from anuses isn't one of them. (so sayeth the irv)

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      • #4
        Quoth JustADude View Post
        You forgot another Pro... the side-effects of having a wife that really wants to make a baby. Ne?

        Oh, and yes, you're maintaining your perfect 10/10 with this very nicely.
        Can't be worth the side-effects of HAVING a baby.
        I was not hired to respond to those voices.

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        • #5
          Quoth poofy_puff View Post
          Can't be worth the side-effects of HAVING a baby.
          "How was I supposed to know someone was slipping you Birth Control in the food I've been making for you lately?"



          But yeah, Bob the Goat is quickly climbing the ranks to become one of my favorite superheroes.
          Flood

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          • #6
            Quoth Flood View Post
            "How was I supposed to know someone was slipping you Birth Control in the food I've been making for you lately?"
            And that is going in my memory file for later retrieval. Perhaps it'll inspire birthcontrol in the school's drinking water
            How was I supposed to know someone was slipping you Birth Control in the food I've been making for you lately?

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            • #7
              Good job on getting a kid to be quite. if it wheren't for the fact the mother said the little girl just wont be quite if wouldn't have done that. My kids have learned that is they scream, they aren't going to get anything and even though it may have tourcherd other people around me I would ignored them when they would scream make them sit as far away from the playland as possible and no happy meal. Or I would leave go through drive through and no happy meal.

              If they where quite and behaved they would get the happy meal and playland when they where done. They quickly learned that if they where quite they where better off

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              • #8
                *giggle* birthcontrol brownies *giggle*

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                • #9
                  See, I could never do this... I just dislike children. I know thats pretty much like saying "I hate puppies" but it's true. Which is what shocked me about Toys R' Us... I don't... interact with many children.

                  In fact, most of the time I don't even SEE a child. I just work with parents, uncles, grandparents, and geeks like me who just want toys and games. Though, on the occasion there is a screaming child? It's just... Uhg. I don't want to get on my knee and talk to the kid... I want to say "HEY! YOU chose to spawn, now take some god damn responsibility!"

                  But then.. I'm a mean ol' man of 22
                  "How bloody difficult is it to take care of a DVD?"
                  ~Me after any time I look at the back of a disc~

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                  • #10
                    Quoth Will-Mun View Post
                    See, I could never do this... I just dislike children. I know thats pretty much like saying "I hate puppies" but it's true. Which is what shocked me about Toys R' Us... I don't... interact with many children.

                    In fact, most of the time I don't even SEE a child. I just work with parents, uncles, grandparents, and geeks like me who just want toys and games. Though, on the occasion there is a screaming child? It's just... Uhg. I don't want to get on my knee and talk to the kid... I want to say "HEY! YOU chose to spawn, now take some god damn responsibility!"

                    But then.. I'm a mean ol' man of 22
                    I dislike children too. Get on a kid's level? Not happening. I just don't have it in me.

                    But people who CAN do that are awesome. Thank you, folks, for saving my sanity one precious shred at a time.

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                    • #11
                      Sounds like the mom just didn't know how to handle her...maybe your little "Supernanny" episode will inspire her...
                      I don't go in for ancient wisdom
                      I don't believe just 'cause ideas are tenacious
                      It means that they're worthy - Tim Minchin, "White Wine in the Sun"

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                      • #12
                        I don't have much patience for kids. I have my Dad's bad temper. lol!
                        You did a great job though! The Mom (and everyone else within ear range) will be SO much happier now.
                        Be like the flower that perfumes the very hand that crushes it.

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                        • #13
                          Interesting. I've used the 'Get on the child's eye level' trick to get kids to open up and at least respond to my greetings, but it usually doesn't go much farther, because I'm still freakishly tall on my knees. I think, short of sitting down fully, most kids are afraid of me. And I can prove that, too.
                          We went to my now sister in law's wedding shower, and there were a handful of little kids running around, none of whom responded to me when I tried to talk to them. However, much, much later, when I was sitting cross-legged on the ground, one of the kids just came over and plopped herself right on my lap, apparently thinking me a chair. I was confused for a moment, then called for someone to get a picture of this.
                          "I call murder on that!"

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                          • #14
                            Quoth bob the goat View Post
                            Con: The Uber parenting skill has turned my wife baby crazy. I think I may have to punch a puppy to nip this in the bud.
                            Please don't. Michael Vick already tried that. See what happens when you abuse pets? Anyhoo, awesome story. Hopefully, you've converted her.

                            Tex
                            Dr. Turk: Yo, Elliot... what's your ringtone?
                            Dr. Reid: "Jesus, Take the Wheel" by Carrie Underwood.
                            The Todd: "I'm carrying under wood right now. See, that's funny because it's true."

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                            • #15
                              Bob, what color is your cape?

                              With each of my kids it took one time of walking them out of the store, empty-handed, for it to sink in that I wouldn't put up with that kind of behavior. Recently, after several years, I had to have a modified reminder due to their failure to follow the rules. It worked great.
                              Labor boards have info on local laws for free
                              HR believes the first person in the door
                              Learn how to go over whackamole bosses' heads safely
                              Document everything
                              CS proves Dunning-Kruger effect

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