Offensive Lettuce

[rerant]

I believe it was Mitch Hedberg who said, "Everything you eat is bite-sized."

[MystyGlyttyr]

I seriously read this, and there was a legit 25-second delay between finishing the last sentence and then bursting into hysterical laughter. The brains ground to a halt for that long.

[Shengirl]

I'm trying to wrap my head around the idea of offensive lettuce. Yeah-no, not working. Was the lettuce fingering her?

You just sent my brain into a dark, dark place.

[smileyeagle1021]

I'm trying to wrap my head around the idea of offensive lettuce. Yeah-no, not working. Was the lettuce fingering her? Was it so large that it had grown a mouth and it's own sentience and was muttering lewd comments about how it and the lady should run away to a cheap hotel room?

You just sent my brain into a dark, dark place.

ouch, pass that brain bleach, that entire post sent my brain to a place both dark and dirty.
Now I can't get the image of some cartoon like lettuce fingering an old lady

[Cia]

She shouldn't go to the Alpine Inn in Hill City then, their salad consists of a 1/8 to a 1/4 wedge of iceberg lettuce with dressing drizzled over it.

[zzapp the witch]

Fingering lettuce = my ROFLMFAO

[cloudiko]

Good grief, I love you guys!!!

Pass the brain bleach though...fingering lettuce....oh lord.

[edible_hat]

Fingering lettuce = my ROFLMFAO

or is that rofflemayo? *ducks*