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  • #1

    Sarcastic customers

    This happened to my coworker S, who was next to me on the box office.

    SC asks for tickets to a film.
    S: "Would you like standard or luxury?"
    SC: "I want to sit down."
    S, indicates to the screen with the seating plan, "Where would you like to sit?"
    SC: "In front of the screen."

    Those responses were really helpful, and I'm sure you'd be quick to complain if you had seats in the front row.
    "I can tell her you're all tied up in the projection room." Sunset Boulevard.
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  • #2
    Quoth cinema guy View Post
    This happened to my coworker S, who was next to me on the box office.

    SC asks for tickets to a film.
    S: "Would you like standard or luxury?"
    SC: "I want to sit down."
    S, indicates to the screen with the seating plan, "Where would you like to sit?"
    SC: "In front of the screen."

    Those responses were really helpful, and I'm sure you'd be quick to complain if you had seats in the front row.
    That's not sarcasm (unless the person just sucks at it), I'd term that more apathy. Take it from the guy who took the character of Gregory House and played him as a Jedi.

    Sarcasm:

    S: "Would you like standard or luxury?"

    SC: "Ooh. A choice between sitting with gum under my shoe and Joe-Bob picking his nose next to me, and sitting with Buffy and Biff with their noses up so high I can see the light shining through their nostrils."

    S, indicates to the screen with the seating plan, "Where would you like to sit?"

    SC: "Wow, not a good seat in the house. Ohhh, I'll take the second elevated row back. I'm much more likely to be able to kick some cell phone talker in the head. By accident of course. Do I fill out the loan application for tickets now, or just once at the concession stand when I buy my $50 nachos and drink?"
    The Rich keep getting richer because they keep doing what it was that made them rich. Ditto the Poor.
    "Hy kan tell dey is schmot qvestions, dey is makink my head hurt."
    Hoc spatio locantur.

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    • #3
      Quoth Geek King View Post
      Take it from the guy who took the character of Gregory House and played him as a Jedi.
      I would pay to see that. Pay, alot of money. I'm a major House, and Star Wars fan, so you could sell tickets at nearly any price, and I would pay.
      We Pick Up the Pieces

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      • #4
        Sarcasm is my greatest atribute and as much as I apreciate good sarcasm, there is a time and place for everything.
        When I have a line up of roughly 15 people and ask you, "Are all of these boxes identical?" and you think it's cute to answer, "They better be," that is not the time, nor th place.
        In fact the act of saying, "they better be," now causes me to scan each item individually, since if you can't be sure they're the same, nor can I.
        This takes slightly longer than hitting #+quantity and scanning only one.

        Here's are a couple sarcastic responses that slightly irritate me:
        Me: Are you going to need delivery?
        Customer: Only if you're the one delivering it.
        Ha ha, you're hilarious. Could you just answer the damn question please?

        Me: May I have your postal code, please?
        Customer: Why, are you coming over to visit? *wink wink*
        Yes, and I'm bringing my mace. And no I don't mean the kind in the spray can. I mean the pointy death kind.

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        • #5
          Quoth rerant View Post
          Me: May I have your postal code, please?
          Customer: Why, are you coming over to visit? *wink wink*
          Yes, and I'm bringing my mace. And no I don't mean the kind in the spray can. I mean the pointy death kind.
          *Stares into space, drooling slightly* Yes, yes, what a lovely dream.
          "If everyone is thinking alike, someone isn't thinking." - George Patton

          "If you can't explain it simply, you don't understand it well enough." - Albert Einstein

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          • #6
            Sarcasm is my greatest atribute and as much as I apreciate good sarcasm, there is a time and place for everything.
            When I have a line up of roughly 15 people and ask you, "Are all of these boxes identical?" and you think it's cute to answer, "They better be," that is not the time, nor th place.
            In fact the act of saying, "they better be," now causes me to scan each item individually, since if you can't be sure they're the same, nor can I.
            This takes slightly longer than hitting #+quantity and scanning only one.
            Lucky you. Our cashiers only get to use the quantity key at Back to School time, when customers are buying 10, 20, 30 or 100 notebooks or folders at a time.

            Here's are a couple sarcastic responses that slightly irritate me:
            Me: Are you going to need delivery?
            Customer: Only if you're the one delivering it.
            Something similar I get from time to time when I'm doing furniture carryouts:

            Customer: Can you come over to my place and help me build it? hyuk hyuk hyuk....
            Me: I charge $50 for every half hour, and only if you leave your job and help us run freight on Thursday.
            Customer: I have beer.
            Knowledge is power. Power corrupts. Study hard. Be evil.

            "I never said I wasn't a horrible person."--Me, almost daily

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            • #7
              Quoth Sylvia727 View Post
              *Stares into space, drooling slightly* Yes, yes, what a lovely dream.
              It was only a dream?

              Damn.

              <sigh>
              I don't go in for ancient wisdom
              I don't believe just 'cause ideas are tenacious
              It means that they're worthy - Tim Minchin, "White Wine in the Sun"

              Comment

              • #8
                Quoth rerant View Post
                Here's are a couple sarcastic responses that slightly irritate me:
                Me: Are you going to need delivery?
                Customer: Only if you're the one delivering it.
                Ha ha, you're hilarious. Could you just answer the damn question please?
                Not sarcasm. Lechery. There's a difference.
                Me: May I have your postal code, please?
                Customer: Why, are you coming over to visit? *wink wink*
                Yes, and I'm bringing my mace. And no I don't mean the kind in the spray can. I mean the pointy death kind.
                Again, he's not being sarcastic, he's being lecherous.
                [princess bride] you keep using that word. I do not think you know what it means [/princess bride]
                Ba'al: I'm a god. Gods are all-knowing.

                http://unrelatedcaptions.com/45147

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                • #9
                  Quoth d962831 View Post
                  I would pay to see that. Pay, alot of money. I'm a major House, and Star Wars fan, so you could sell tickets at nearly any price, and I would pay.


                  Oh, gods, was it a blast! I sat down and watched the whole first season the week before the campaign started. Then I completely turned off the brain filters and went to town. Some of the in-character comments are still being quoted.

                  "There's 9 boobs in this party, and only six are her's!"

                  "Lovely. Doomed again. Thanks Guys. Maybe next time we can destroy a planet."

                  "Ooooh, terrifying! Do the Sith teach you to kick puppies too?"

                  "You just got tossed around by the medic. The Dark Side is probably off blushing in shame." <I had a lot of power invested in TK, and could "Force Push" with the best. )

                  If you ever end up in SW Ohio, PM me. The group I play in has a lot of fun, and we tend to having some oddball characters. We're playing the Conan RPG right now, and no one is playing a barbarian, or fighter. 2 Pirates, 2 Nobles, a Temptress, and (me) a Thief no one knows is really a girl (even out of character. GMs are having a ball). One of the Nobles is currently cursed after sleeping with a deamoness, and the Pirates are trying to secretly kill each other. Oh, and I might have accidentally got us attacked by undead and demon spiders when I stole an idol. Maybe.


                  Er...back to the topic...sorry about that.
                  The Rich keep getting richer because they keep doing what it was that made them rich. Ditto the Poor.
                  "Hy kan tell dey is schmot qvestions, dey is makink my head hurt."
                  Hoc spatio locantur.

                  Comment

                  • #10
                    Quoth Geek King View Post
                    Take it from the guy who took the character of Gregory House and played him as a Jedi.
                    Have you been following the Darths & Droids webcomic, by any chance? It's... interesting... seeing R2 with an attitude.

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                    • #11
                      If someone wanted to sit in front of the screen, I'd simply, quietly, sell them the worst seats possible.
                      "Always stand near the door." -- Doctor Who

                      Kuya's Kitchen -- Cooking, Cooking Gadgets, and Food Related Blather from a Transplanted Foodie

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