Announcement

**mattm04** · 02-04-2008, 04:09 AM

I wish our managers would let us stop taking orders with abusive phone customers, but they haven't. Even when other stores (i.e. our competitors) refuse to deal with her.

**unholypet** · 02-04-2008, 04:16 AM

No joke. That was one time we all felt very happy for the day.

**Snowbird** · 02-04-2008, 06:26 AM

Quoth unholypet View Post

Silent Treatment

In walks another group, a half hour late for the buffet.
Woman, Man, and Me.

W: We want the buffet.
M:Yes, the buffet.
Me: (Tweedle dumb and dumber) It closed at 7:30, sorry. Is there anything I ca--

I had to stop. Have you ever watched the Children of the Corn? They put that funny look in their eyes at mine. I looked back forth between them with a confuddled look on my face, I'm sure. But they just STOOD there.

Me: I could make you anything you'd like off of the... the menu.........

My manager beside me (previously on the phone) was now subject to the silent treatment, as well. I think she felt their fiery hatred which burned like that of Gravekeeper's DEATH TO AMERICA guy.

Me: Or you'd like something to go?
M + W : .....
Me: ...
Manager: ...

So we all stood there and stared around a bit. At this point it was just silly. So I laughed at them. And they literally, backed out of the door.

Maybe they thought if they stared at you that way for long enough, you'd break down and become a willing zombie to their command? "Yes mahstah.. *drool*"

Ironically, I can't see the term 'Children of the Corn' without thinking of a family of SC's* I had way back when. Their kids were monsters, nearly got speared by a t-shirt display they turned over, thus earning them that nickname... because part of the SC's last name had corn in it.

*I should note that these folks became former SC's, after the mother bought a 'how to discipline your kids' book from my store. It was a miracle.

**Lingering Grin** · 02-04-2008, 06:29 AM

Quoth Snowbird View Post

*I should note that these folks became former SC's, after the mother bought a 'how to discipline your kids' book from my store. It was a miracle.

They make books for that? lol

My parents approach always seemed to work well for me and my sister.

Step 1: "Don't touch that."
Step 2: "I SAID DON'T Touch That"
Step 3: "<says child's full name> GET OVER HERE NOW!"
Step 4: *Smack upside the head*

Step 4 never failed to get our attention

**Snowbird** · 02-04-2008, 06:38 AM

Quoth Lingering Grin View Post

They make books for that? lol

lol Sure, not all parents are imbued with the skills needed, and that mother definitely didn't. Every time she was in the store with her mob of three, she wouldn't raise her voice higher than a whisper and just sighed a lot when they got into trouble. That book gave her the 'you are allowed to put your foot down' clue.

**Cyphr** · 02-04-2008, 11:27 AM

ita amzing how many parents are scared of life for their children. I know parents can't watch their kids all hte time but i still see no reason for half the tv laws nowadays they have chips that wont let you watch thingsrated <rating> and up when you set it up use it and get a good blacklist for porn

**gunsage** · 02-04-2008, 03:37 PM

That idiotic repetition reminded me of one situation I dealt with in concerns to a level 2 rep. I probably already mentioned it, but it doesn't get old for me as it's an absolute staple of incompetence. I will try to stay as nontechnical as possible.

BS Attempt #1

Me: "X Company level 3 department, this is Sage."
T2: "Ya, this is OMFGWHATTADUMBASS speaking, I've got a ticket for you."*
Me: "Could I have the phone number?"
T2: "Certainly! Uh...okay it's XXX-XXX-XXXX."**
Me: *Looking up various information* "...Alright, and what seems to be the problem?"
T2: "Well, he's getting a DHCP server error."***
Me: *Discovers a router and also hours of uptime* "Well, there's two problems here. He has a third party router attached-"
T2: "That was removed."
Me: "It's still showing on here, potentially because it wasn't powercycled, so-"
T2: "We powercycled several times."
Me: "Sir, the uptime is showing multiple hours."
T2: "Well, I don't know what to tell you! We powercycled."
Me: "If you had powercycled even once, this router would not be present in my diagnostics-" *T2 tries to interrupt and I proceed to talk over him because I've had it with his BS* "-and further with multiple hours of uptime, I'm compelled to believe that either the router was NOT removed or you did not powercycle correctly."****
T2: "So...you're saying you won't take it?"
Me: "What I'm saying is that it appears there are several missed steps here. Look, if you go back, remove the router, then powercycle, there's a chance it will work. And hey, if it doesn't, wonderful, we'll take it."
T2: *Apparently his brain got stuck in autoprov* "So...you're saying you won't take it?"
Me: "Fine, yes, I'm saying I won't take it."

He proceeded to get my information. Since he took it back, I didn't bother leaving feedback...YET.

BS Attempt #2

Literally 30 seconds later...

Me: "X Company level 3 department, this is Sage."
T2: "Ya, this is OMFGWHATTADUMBASS speaking, I've got a ticket for you."*
Me: *Groans silently* "Could I have the phone number?"
T2: "Certainly! Uh...okay it's XXX-XXX-XXXX."**
Me: "Hmm..." *Information was still up on my screen* "Okay, what seems to be the problem?"
T2: "Well, uh, two things. One, this guy has a DHCP server error...and two, it was rejected for some reason by-"

I don't recall exactly what he said next, but essentially here's what you need to know. He badmouthed me. Now, he kept it "kosher"...but it was obvious he not only wasn't happy with me, but also that he had every intent to badmouth me to whoever he got next. I let him talk for a while. Then, when he asked if he could transfer the customer, this little gem happened...

Me: "OMFGWHATTADUMBASS, actually, the t3 you spoke to was ME. Now, currently I have not documented what you did NOT do for your feedback, but as I asked you before and I see you have still failed to do according to my diagnostics, you need to remove the router and powercycle."

He got PISSED. He said a few choice things (again, no cursing or whatever, but still threatening), then hung up. I STILL hadn't documented his behavior.

BS Attempt #3

That's right...he called back less than 30 seconds later and got me again.

Me: "X Company level 3 department, this is Sage."
T2: "You again! Well...well, fine! I'll try again!"

And hung up. You bet your ass I documented at that point. I'm glad, too. I haven't heard from this asshole again and I guess the next person he got he had cold transferred to. What an ass.

*Some people have the ticketting system up at all times. I do not. This is primarily because I can look up FAR MORE information much quicker with the billing system and diagnostics before the ticketting system loads up because it's probably my slowest tool. No, I don't care that it works fine for you, it doesn't for me.

**For some reason, even though they should have the ticket right in front of them and the phone number right under it, there's always this...delay. Sometimes it's because I catch them off guard, but it makes me wonder if they just wrote the number on their palm, expected me to take the number, then transfer on over with no real info.

***This can mean a variety of things. Perhaps the ethernet card is faulty. Maybe the cable has a short. Bad ethernet port on modem, maybe. Et friggin cetera. When I worked as a tier 2, this wasn't good enough to transfer to tier 3 unless we could prove EXACTLY what the problem was as it's a very general one. It's almost as like saying "MAH INTARWEB NO WORKIE."

****There are situations where I might not be able to tell what you have or haven't done. As a result, I look over your notes with a fine tooth comb and compare what you've written to my diagnostics, account history, etc. If I find a flaw, I will subtlely cue you in to it. At that point, it's best to fess up and not be an ass. In other words, if I ask you a question, I already know the real answer, I just want to see what you have to say for yourself. Don't BS me. EVER.

**chainedbarista** · 02-04-2008, 03:47 PM

In walks three adults, two children. All arrive in a small car.

why is circus music circulating through my head after reading this?

**SuperB** · 02-04-2008, 04:03 PM

Quoth unholypet View Post

RG: Cool, man... What time do you run tomorrow?
Me: We open at 11, and close at 2.
RG: ON SUPER BOWL SUNDAY!??!?!??!
Me: We open/close the same times every Sunday.

This is where the redneck gene bubbles into his brain.

RG: I'M GONNA BE A-SITTIN HERE ON THIS COUCH WITH NO PIZZA! YOU TELL YOUR MANAGER HE'S A COBB-SWALLOWIN--
Me: My manager is a woman, sir.
RG: BY GOD NOW WE GOT FEMALES RUNNIN THA FOOD! I AIN'T TAKIN IT! I AIN'T TAKIN IT! MY DANG SUPER BOWL SUNDAY PMGBBQ IMMA PWN YOUR NEWB ARSE UP THA CREEK LIL MISSY!
*click*

And people wonder why domestic abuse skyrockets on Super Bowl Sunday.

**Geek King** · 02-04-2008, 04:42 PM

Quoth SuperB View Post

And people wonder why domestic abuse skyrockets on Super Bowl Sunday.

And others wonder why Snopes exist.

Seriously, though. People who have a real problem vote with their feet. Repeat complainers are usually lazy or looking to make a fuss.

**SuperB** · 02-04-2008, 05:11 PM

http://www.fair.org/extra/9304/superbowl.html

DUI's also increase.

**gunsage** · 02-04-2008, 05:49 PM

In any case, I didn't beat my wife. Or child. And I did drink. I'm proud to be a statistic.

Announcement

Seven thirty. NO. Yes. NO!!!

Seven thirty. NO. Yes. NO!!!

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