It's been a while since I've regaled you with the suckiness of the customers at my workplace(Wal-Mart) This isn't due to a lack of suckiness but, rather a lack of free time on my part. Now that i actually have so free time I'll give you an three of the SCs i have encountered recently.
Car asshole:
My fellow stockman and I are out collecting carts, we are going down one aisle in the parking lot and are collecting carts from a corral when a beat-up, battered ford Tempo honks it's horn at us.
CA: Carr Asshole
M: my fellow stockman
ME:
CA: HEY! ARE YOU LAZY MUTHERF-CKERS GONNA MOVE OR DO I HAVE TO MOW YOU DOWN!!!!!
M:
ME:
We'll move them sir.
So we move them, and the dude pulls in so fast that he nearly clips me.
CA: YOU HIT MY CAR!!! I WILL SUE WAL-MART !!! I"LL HAVE YOUR JOBS!!!! YOU HIT ME 'CAUSE I AM BLACK!!! I BET YOU BOTH BELONG TO THE KKK!!! WE"LL GUESS WHAT CRACKERS!!! I COULD RUN YOU OVER AND NO ONE WOULD CARE!!! (goes inside)
M: What the___
ME: No idea, must've forgotten his meds or something.
HP fangirl nut and her wacky momma
During a bad rainstorm, i a zoning Stationary and putting away books. A girl of about 14 0r 15 comes up.
HPFG: EXCUUUUUSE ME!!!!
ME: Yes?
HPFG: WHERE ARE THE REST OF THE HP BOOKS??????
Me: The rest?
HPFG: Yeah the rest, dummy, i know you are illetterate because you work here, but for those of us who can read, whwre are the rest of your Harry POtter books.
ME:What we have out is what we have.
HPFG: LIAR!!! I'LL GET MY MOM!!!
<I go back to zoning>
HPFG: THERE HE IS MOMMY!!!!
HPFG's MOM: HEY IDIOT!!!!!!! GET MY DAUGHTER THE OTHE HP BOOKS YOU HAVE NOW!!!!
ME: What we have out is what we have available.
HPFG's MOM: YOU ARE A WORTHLESS LIAR!!! GET MY DAUGHTER THOSE BOOKS NOW, OR ELSE I'LL HAVE YOU FIRED.
ME: We don't have any others ma'am.
HPFG: MY DAUGHTER"S CHRISTMAS IS RUINED BECAUSE OF YOU< I BET YOU DON"T CELEBRATE CHRISTMAS YOU K-KE.
Manager:<walking by. What? did you call him
HPFG: A K-KE B-TCH.
Manager: Both of you leave this store now.
HPFG's Mom: Do you realize how much money we spend here?
Manager: No, and I don't care leave this store now or I'll have security toss you out.
HPFG: We'll tell our whole church never to shop here again.
Manager: Fine, as long as you leave.
HPFG and her mom depart)
Electric cart lunacy
As I have mentioned electric carts cannot be taken outside, well this one couple didn't get it
DG: Door greeter
SC: You know thisone by heart by now.
SCW: SC's wife
CSM: CSM
M: manager
DG: Sir You can't take that cart outside.
SC: I can do whatever i want I am a customer.
DG: Sir you cannot take thatoutside the store.
SC: I am a customer, i can do what I want. GET ME YOUR MANAGER!!
<CSM and M appear>
CSM: Sir you cannot take this outside.
SC: well too bad, <tries to take off, CSM rail on back of seat>
SCW: WE WILL TAKE THAT OUTSIDE> WE WILL DO WHATEWVER WE WANT WE ARE CUSTOMERS!!!!! WE ARE ELEDERLY!!!!! WE CAN DO WHAT WE WANT!!!!! <To CSM> and if you touch anything that doesn't belong to you agagin i will knockj you on your ass.
M: YOU cannot tlk to my people like that .
CSW: OH,YEAH, you try and stop us from taking this outside and we'll sue!!!
M: Ma'am you cannot take that cart outside. Now walk out of this store and don't come back.
CSW: We'll sue.
M: I'll have you banned for threatening my employee, now leave.
<CS and CSW walk out>
Car asshole:
My fellow stockman and I are out collecting carts, we are going down one aisle in the parking lot and are collecting carts from a corral when a beat-up, battered ford Tempo honks it's horn at us.
CA: Carr Asshole
M: my fellow stockman
ME:
CA: HEY! ARE YOU LAZY MUTHERF-CKERS GONNA MOVE OR DO I HAVE TO MOW YOU DOWN!!!!!
M:

ME:

So we move them, and the dude pulls in so fast that he nearly clips me.
CA: YOU HIT MY CAR!!! I WILL SUE WAL-MART !!! I"LL HAVE YOUR JOBS!!!! YOU HIT ME 'CAUSE I AM BLACK!!! I BET YOU BOTH BELONG TO THE KKK!!! WE"LL GUESS WHAT CRACKERS!!! I COULD RUN YOU OVER AND NO ONE WOULD CARE!!! (goes inside)
M: What the___
ME: No idea, must've forgotten his meds or something.
HP fangirl nut and her wacky momma
During a bad rainstorm, i a zoning Stationary and putting away books. A girl of about 14 0r 15 comes up.
HPFG: EXCUUUUUSE ME!!!!
ME: Yes?
HPFG: WHERE ARE THE REST OF THE HP BOOKS??????
Me: The rest?
HPFG: Yeah the rest, dummy, i know you are illetterate because you work here, but for those of us who can read, whwre are the rest of your Harry POtter books.
ME:What we have out is what we have.
HPFG: LIAR!!! I'LL GET MY MOM!!!
<I go back to zoning>
HPFG: THERE HE IS MOMMY!!!!
HPFG's MOM: HEY IDIOT!!!!!!! GET MY DAUGHTER THE OTHE HP BOOKS YOU HAVE NOW!!!!
ME: What we have out is what we have available.
HPFG's MOM: YOU ARE A WORTHLESS LIAR!!! GET MY DAUGHTER THOSE BOOKS NOW, OR ELSE I'LL HAVE YOU FIRED.
ME: We don't have any others ma'am.
HPFG: MY DAUGHTER"S CHRISTMAS IS RUINED BECAUSE OF YOU< I BET YOU DON"T CELEBRATE CHRISTMAS YOU K-KE.
Manager:<walking by. What? did you call him
HPFG: A K-KE B-TCH.
Manager: Both of you leave this store now.
HPFG's Mom: Do you realize how much money we spend here?
Manager: No, and I don't care leave this store now or I'll have security toss you out.
HPFG: We'll tell our whole church never to shop here again.
Manager: Fine, as long as you leave.
HPFG and her mom depart)
Electric cart lunacy
As I have mentioned electric carts cannot be taken outside, well this one couple didn't get it
DG: Door greeter
SC: You know thisone by heart by now.
SCW: SC's wife
CSM: CSM
M: manager
DG: Sir You can't take that cart outside.
SC: I can do whatever i want I am a customer.
DG: Sir you cannot take thatoutside the store.
SC: I am a customer, i can do what I want. GET ME YOUR MANAGER!!
<CSM and M appear>
CSM: Sir you cannot take this outside.
SC: well too bad, <tries to take off, CSM rail on back of seat>
SCW: WE WILL TAKE THAT OUTSIDE> WE WILL DO WHATEWVER WE WANT WE ARE CUSTOMERS!!!!! WE ARE ELEDERLY!!!!! WE CAN DO WHAT WE WANT!!!!! <To CSM> and if you touch anything that doesn't belong to you agagin i will knockj you on your ass.
M: YOU cannot tlk to my people like that .
CSW: OH,YEAH, you try and stop us from taking this outside and we'll sue!!!
M: Ma'am you cannot take that cart outside. Now walk out of this store and don't come back.
CSW: We'll sue.
M: I'll have you banned for threatening my employee, now leave.
<CS and CSW walk out>
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