What Was That?

[Dips]

Someone called this afternoon and wanted me to verify...um...something.

I still don't know what it was because she was talking very fast and mumbling.

It was like:

I jut neea no, fo wat do otta shippa, no cha, ya do dat, ya?

The best I could come up with was:

I just need to know, for what [gibberish], [gibberish], you do that, yes?

When I tried to get her to clarify, she got louder and faster, but not more understandable. She seemed very insistent that I agree with her, though, and wouldn't give up.

Problem is, I'm not going to agree to something I can't understand. She wasn't going to get a "yes" until I knew what I was saying "yes" to. I'm also a rock of stubborn when I suspect someone of deliberately trying to wear me down.

Even so, I can't stay on the phone all day. So I took another tack.

I just started rattling off some random information for her. The name of our company. What we sell. Our prices. Our shipping policies (on the chance that "shippa" could have been "shipping"). She listened, quite politely, and said, as clear as day, "Thanks. That's all I needed. Good-bye."

And hung up.

Ooooo-kay.

[One-Fang]

The other simple option:

Cus: I jut neea no, fo wat do otta shippa, no cha, ya do dat, ya?

You: No I'm sorry, we don't do that. Anything else I can help you with today?

[Ree]

I think she wanted to know your shipping charges.

[chainedbarista]

I jut neea no, fo wat do otta shippa, no cha, ya do dat, ya?

i think it's this: i just need to know, for what do the other shipper, not you, charge, you do that, ya?

but then again, without hearing it myself (or even possibly i did) the translation loses something(s), clarity, for starters.

sounds a lot like hillbilly, which we get some of occasionally.

[Ringtail Z28]

Sounds a lot like my coworkers, nearly all of which are very old Vietnamese women.

[Mikkel]

At least you answered her question and against all odds too .

[MystyGlyttyr]

I jut neea no, fo wat do otta shippa, no cha, ya do dat, ya?

Okay, since Redneck is my native tongue, I pronunciated this a few times and this is the direct translation I came up with.

"I just need to know, for what others ship, no charge, you do that, yes?"

And a further translation to get it out of Engrish status...

"I'm comparison shopping and just need to know what price you charge for shipping. You do ship, don't you?"

Whoot for having way too much experience in talking to these people. Don't know if that's a or a . Probably a .

[phillippbo]

Back when I worked for a certain shipping company that has a big home in Memphis, we got calls like this all the time. Admittedly, I probably wouldn't be able to decipher the gibberish above, but I did learn to listen for key words:

Caller: "Djfkdlajadonf nfkdaoinsda klkljfdlkau ndlklka package jdakljfdiji djkajkadf dhak ship fdkaljfd;-kdaja fjak; dhoinw today."
Me: "Oh, you need to schedule a pickup for today?"

Caller: "Ondoiaofdsaoi fdauiofnei dsklafiol kdjklja package kaoinfoien delivered adfin;oaf."
Me: "Okay, what's your tracking number so I can pull that up?" (package tracking)

And we had callers that every word was clear and understandable, but the meaning behind them was a bit muddy:

Caller (in a hillbilly/redneckish voice): "Yeah, ah got this thing on the thing with the numbers on it?"
Me: "The doortag. What's your tracking number so I can pull the package info?"
(I can either read minds, or was doing that job waaaaaaay too long.)

Me: <intro>
Caller: "You don't deserve it!"
Me: <blink, blink> "... I'm sorry?"
Caller: "J-j-j-just remember, 'you don't deserve it." <click>
Me: <blink, blink, blink> "... uhhhh, okaaaay. Thank you for calling <shipping company>."