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That's what I called today, as so many things happened in my 10.5 hour shift.
I don't accept cash
When I got in unfortunately one of my coworkers had a breakdown and was up in HR making a formal complaint against a coworker.
As I've mentioned in previous posts we have separate debit/credit lanes that do not accept cash.
At the time one of the girls on a cash accepting lane was on break, the other in HR, so there was only one left, and three debit/credit lanes. I know it's annoying but these things happen.
A man approaches wielding a $100 bill.
Me: I'm sorry, I don't accept cash here. Lane 15 ca-
SC: EVERY lane says "debit and credit", "debit and credit", everywhere I look, "debit and credit".
Me: We're a little short staffed right now, but I know lane 15 is accepting cash.
SC: NO! It's debit and credit.
Me: No, sir, she can accept cash.
SC: Wanna bet?
Me: Yes.
He walks down to lane 15, looks up and sees no "debit and credit only" sign and THROWS his stuff on the floor and stomps out.
A bit touchy today, are we?
That's not AS-IS
Our AS-IS section sells discontinued, damaged or display items for a significantly reduced price. There are certain measures we take to make sure we know it's an AS-IS product.
A man approaches with a six drawer dresser, normally $150. The box is ripped but otherwise the product itself is not damaged.
There is also a tiny price tag (the sort that comes from pricing guns) that says $15 barely hanging on to the item.
Me: I'm sorry, this seems to be priced with the wrong tag. I'm going to have to call the department to get the right one.
This can be translated to: do you think I'm stupid and would believe this ridiculous attempt to screw me over?
Note: we've been having a LOT of issues with customers screwing around with the prices of AS-IS items lately.
The department coworker comes over and flatly says, "This is not an AS-IS item and I'm not selling it as one."
Yeah, you're not puling one over on us, sorry.
This is a furniture store, not a singles bar.
Total number of men who hit on me today: three.
Total number of men who hit on me today who could be my father: three.
Sorry if I'm not giving in to your advances, but at a week from being 23 I have no desire to get involved with someone nearly twice my age.
PS you're ugly anyway.
I want another one!
Display items cannot be sold. Usually.
A man brought up a real cowhide rug (UGLY as sin!) with a display tag on it.
I explain that I'll need to get a new one and call the department.
The girl on the phone says with natural hide rugs they'll sell displays, since they're all slightly different anyway and finding one the customer would like would be a pain in the ass.
I explain this to him and he takes it.
Then...
SC: So where's my new one?
Me: Oh you can just take this one. We can sell this display so you're all set.
SC: But I want another one.
Me: You want a second one, or a different one?
SC: A different one.
Me: Why? You can have this one.
SC: I just want a different one.
Me: Well it's natural cowhide so no one will bring up a new one, since they're all slightly different and it's impossible for them to choose one you'll like.
SC; Someone is going to get me a different one!
At this point he's being a SERIOUS jerk. Even more so than he was through the whole transaction.
Me: Then you can go get one, because the girl in the department already said she's not going try and read your mind and find one you want.
SC: *leaves*
So... you can have the one you chose, the one you wanted and the one you decided to spend $299+tax on, but now you want a different one?
Get out of my life.
Delivery
A woman approaches with her two young daughters, two carts of furniture, and a Cash and Carry order (more stuff in the separate warehouse).
Me: Will you be needing delivery?
Woman: *gives me a look like I'm mentally challenged and I just threw up on her first born, then says in a snotty, fake-confused tone* Uhh... no?
Ok? I thought that was a reasonable question.
I should have introduced her to the next guy.
Man: I'll be needing delivery.
Note: all he had was four small lamps, some light bulbs and two shelving units that together weigh about 7lbs and in their disassembled state measure no more than 2.5'x2'.
In other words, he could take it on the bus with him if he had to.
Me: You want to pay $59+tax to have these delivered? Are you sure?
Man: Yeah.
Me: You're really sure?
Man: No. Actually, how much does assembly cost?
Me: 15% of the total of the items you want assembled, or $50, whichever is greater. What do you need assembled?
Man: These [shelving units].
Another note: they could be put together in 10 minutes with nothing more than a screwdriver.
Me: It's going to cost $50, are you sure?
Man: Yeah I'll pay for it.
A prime example of someone with more money than brains.
More shelving unit fun
The same shelving units in question in the last case were recently on sale.
normally the frame is $11.99 and each wire basket is $3. Everything is sold separately because you can interchange wire baskets for plastic ones.
Thursday to Sunday were the days of the sale, and the frames were down to $7.99 and the baskets were (I think) $2.
A woman comes by wanting to purchase two units and explains how yesterday she only spent $20something on one unit.
I check the price and before tax it's $23.99.
SC: THAT'S NOT RIGHT!
Me: Why not?
SC: Yesterday it was $20something!
Me: Yesterday they were on sale and today they're not.
SC: But I bought them close to closing time yesterday and they were cheaper.
Me: Yes, but yesterday they were on sale and today they're not.
SC: Call a manager.
Me: O... k.... *calls*
I explain the situation to the DM and after I finish he asks, "So... I don't get what the problem is."
Me: Neither do I. I don't know what else she wants from us.
Note: customer is not in earshot.
DM: Well we're not honouring the price. The sale is over so she's SOL.
Me: Oh I know that, but for some reason she won't accept it.
DM: *sighs* Well just tell her the sale is over and she can take it or leave it.
Me: Done.
I relay the information to the customer and she asks me to call the DM to my register. No. I'm not wasting his time for this asinine shit.
Me: He's very busy right now but I can call someone from the department you got these in. *calls department, repeats story, gets same answer, repeats exact same answer to customer for the... wait, I've lost count how many times I've told her*
SC: Oh *smiles*, ok then. That's all I wanted to know. *leaves*
Me:
Score one for smart ass coworkers and phone conversations customers can't hear
Man and woman are buying a couch and a cover for the couch, as well as getting it delivered.
I ring them through, the woman pays, then comes back.
Woman: This [couch cover] isn't supposed to be $79.99; it's supposed to be $29.99.
Me: Let me call the department and ask.
I call, talk to the really funny guy who works there, and he looks down to my lane and says, "OH! Is it that snotty blonde bitch and her prick boyfriend? They're fucking assholes. Send her back so I can personally point out how stupid she is."
He got a mental high-five for that one.
THAT'S ILLEGAL!
One of my coworkers was getting ready to open on the lane next to me and noticed someone in my line had MANY display items.
He approached the customer to let him know this, and their conversation was told to me by my coworker, since I was busy with other customers and couldn't hear them.
M= my coworker
M: Sir those are display. We can't sell them, but we can get someone to bring you some that aren't display items.
SC: You HAVE to sell them! I'll call the damn Better Business Bureau!
M: Ok, but we still can't sell them.
I heard this one tidbit of the conversation and piped in with, "We can't sell them because they've already been removed from inventory, and selling them would mess that up."
I didn't get a lot of the story, but what ended up happening was M went back to the department to personally help this man find all the non-display items. Half an hour later and MUCH bitching from the SC during the whole process, they're back at cash and M rings him through.
M is one lane over from me and I can hear the SC arguing about prices, paying for bags, blaming M because he (the SC) picked up a pillow of a different size (king, not standard) and was therefore more expensive.
Poor M had to deal with this guy for a full on 45 minutes and was exasperated after the fact.
I was impressed he took him off my hands for me, and later repaid the favour when we walked down to the Canadian Tire gas station and I bought his cigarettes for him, as he's underage.
Now everyone's happy.
THAT'S ILLEGAL! part deux/That's not AS-IS the sequel
We get a lot of random planks of wood in AS-IS that usually sell for $1. Sometimes things are not priced. When they're not priced they have to go back to the department, and do not get priced on the spot at cash by department coworkers.
A woman has a small plank of wood with no price.
I tell her I'll call the department about it (mostly to humour her) when I'm finished switching with the cashier who is on right now, and have rung through the customer who is ahead of her in line.
She says she wanted to go check something anyway, so she'll ask someone herself.
Ok, fine.
About five minutes later she comes back in a huff.
SC: So you're telling me I can't buy something without a price on it!?
Me: I am?
SC: I just got told in the AS-IS department that if something doesn't have a price on it they won't sell it.
Me: If that's their decision there's nothing I can do about it.
SC: Do you KNOW how long I've been shopping here? I've been coming to this exact store for 10 years!
Me: At this location?
SC: Yes this location!
Me: We've only been open for six.
SC: It's illegal not to sell something, you know!
Me: No it's not. Your total is $xx.xx.
Lady, let's get one thing straight: we don't HAVE to sell you a damn thing. In fact, this whole store could be nothing but a showroom of presumably purchasable items that you can't buy.
If we say no, the answer is no. Deal with it.
*sigh*
So all this on top of several people from my department running to HR to file complaints against two coworkers (a SUP and my manager), people crying, people yelling, my favourite LP guy leaving
and general insanity with lines, only having one cash accepting lane for almost an hour, one coworker throwing up in the cash office and having to go home, and being short staffed.
Strangely enough I managed to stay in a good mood all day long.
Oh, AND I cut my finger, causing it to bleed.
This is a problem, since the sheer sight of blood makes me want to throw up; which I nearly did.
Though this had less of a nauseating effect than the sink full of vomit I encountered in the washroom yesterday.
Classy.
AAAAND (I just remembered this) I also dropped (while lifting) a set of bed slats on my collar bone.
Bed slats are the wooden planks all of my store's beds require. They're heavy and they're painful.
How I managed to drop them on my stupid bony, always sticking out, collar bone I'll never know.
Clearly I need a layer of fat on my upper chest to protect me from falling planks of wood.
Damn if the two days off I have starting tomorrow won't be the sweetest thing ever.
I don't accept cash
When I got in unfortunately one of my coworkers had a breakdown and was up in HR making a formal complaint against a coworker.
As I've mentioned in previous posts we have separate debit/credit lanes that do not accept cash.
At the time one of the girls on a cash accepting lane was on break, the other in HR, so there was only one left, and three debit/credit lanes. I know it's annoying but these things happen.
A man approaches wielding a $100 bill.
Me: I'm sorry, I don't accept cash here. Lane 15 ca-
SC: EVERY lane says "debit and credit", "debit and credit", everywhere I look, "debit and credit".
Me: We're a little short staffed right now, but I know lane 15 is accepting cash.
SC: NO! It's debit and credit.
Me: No, sir, she can accept cash.
SC: Wanna bet?
Me: Yes.
He walks down to lane 15, looks up and sees no "debit and credit only" sign and THROWS his stuff on the floor and stomps out.
A bit touchy today, are we?
That's not AS-IS
Our AS-IS section sells discontinued, damaged or display items for a significantly reduced price. There are certain measures we take to make sure we know it's an AS-IS product.
A man approaches with a six drawer dresser, normally $150. The box is ripped but otherwise the product itself is not damaged.
There is also a tiny price tag (the sort that comes from pricing guns) that says $15 barely hanging on to the item.
Me: I'm sorry, this seems to be priced with the wrong tag. I'm going to have to call the department to get the right one.
This can be translated to: do you think I'm stupid and would believe this ridiculous attempt to screw me over?
Note: we've been having a LOT of issues with customers screwing around with the prices of AS-IS items lately.
The department coworker comes over and flatly says, "This is not an AS-IS item and I'm not selling it as one."
Yeah, you're not puling one over on us, sorry.
This is a furniture store, not a singles bar.
Total number of men who hit on me today: three.
Total number of men who hit on me today who could be my father: three.
Sorry if I'm not giving in to your advances, but at a week from being 23 I have no desire to get involved with someone nearly twice my age.
PS you're ugly anyway.
I want another one!
Display items cannot be sold. Usually.
A man brought up a real cowhide rug (UGLY as sin!) with a display tag on it.
I explain that I'll need to get a new one and call the department.
The girl on the phone says with natural hide rugs they'll sell displays, since they're all slightly different anyway and finding one the customer would like would be a pain in the ass.
I explain this to him and he takes it.
Then...
SC: So where's my new one?
Me: Oh you can just take this one. We can sell this display so you're all set.
SC: But I want another one.
Me: You want a second one, or a different one?
SC: A different one.
Me: Why? You can have this one.
SC: I just want a different one.
Me: Well it's natural cowhide so no one will bring up a new one, since they're all slightly different and it's impossible for them to choose one you'll like.
SC; Someone is going to get me a different one!
At this point he's being a SERIOUS jerk. Even more so than he was through the whole transaction.
Me: Then you can go get one, because the girl in the department already said she's not going try and read your mind and find one you want.
SC: *leaves*
So... you can have the one you chose, the one you wanted and the one you decided to spend $299+tax on, but now you want a different one?
Get out of my life.
Delivery
A woman approaches with her two young daughters, two carts of furniture, and a Cash and Carry order (more stuff in the separate warehouse).
Me: Will you be needing delivery?
Woman: *gives me a look like I'm mentally challenged and I just threw up on her first born, then says in a snotty, fake-confused tone* Uhh... no?
Ok? I thought that was a reasonable question.
I should have introduced her to the next guy.
Man: I'll be needing delivery.
Note: all he had was four small lamps, some light bulbs and two shelving units that together weigh about 7lbs and in their disassembled state measure no more than 2.5'x2'.
In other words, he could take it on the bus with him if he had to.
Me: You want to pay $59+tax to have these delivered? Are you sure?
Man: Yeah.
Me: You're really sure?
Man: No. Actually, how much does assembly cost?
Me: 15% of the total of the items you want assembled, or $50, whichever is greater. What do you need assembled?
Man: These [shelving units].
Another note: they could be put together in 10 minutes with nothing more than a screwdriver.
Me: It's going to cost $50, are you sure?
Man: Yeah I'll pay for it.
A prime example of someone with more money than brains.
More shelving unit fun
The same shelving units in question in the last case were recently on sale.
normally the frame is $11.99 and each wire basket is $3. Everything is sold separately because you can interchange wire baskets for plastic ones.
Thursday to Sunday were the days of the sale, and the frames were down to $7.99 and the baskets were (I think) $2.
A woman comes by wanting to purchase two units and explains how yesterday she only spent $20something on one unit.
I check the price and before tax it's $23.99.
SC: THAT'S NOT RIGHT!
Me: Why not?
SC: Yesterday it was $20something!
Me: Yesterday they were on sale and today they're not.
SC: But I bought them close to closing time yesterday and they were cheaper.
Me: Yes, but yesterday they were on sale and today they're not.
SC: Call a manager.
Me: O... k.... *calls*
I explain the situation to the DM and after I finish he asks, "So... I don't get what the problem is."
Me: Neither do I. I don't know what else she wants from us.
Note: customer is not in earshot.
DM: Well we're not honouring the price. The sale is over so she's SOL.
Me: Oh I know that, but for some reason she won't accept it.
DM: *sighs* Well just tell her the sale is over and she can take it or leave it.
Me: Done.
I relay the information to the customer and she asks me to call the DM to my register. No. I'm not wasting his time for this asinine shit.
Me: He's very busy right now but I can call someone from the department you got these in. *calls department, repeats story, gets same answer, repeats exact same answer to customer for the... wait, I've lost count how many times I've told her*
SC: Oh *smiles*, ok then. That's all I wanted to know. *leaves*
Me:
Score one for smart ass coworkers and phone conversations customers can't hear
Man and woman are buying a couch and a cover for the couch, as well as getting it delivered.
I ring them through, the woman pays, then comes back.
Woman: This [couch cover] isn't supposed to be $79.99; it's supposed to be $29.99.
Me: Let me call the department and ask.
I call, talk to the really funny guy who works there, and he looks down to my lane and says, "OH! Is it that snotty blonde bitch and her prick boyfriend? They're fucking assholes. Send her back so I can personally point out how stupid she is."
He got a mental high-five for that one.
THAT'S ILLEGAL!
One of my coworkers was getting ready to open on the lane next to me and noticed someone in my line had MANY display items.
He approached the customer to let him know this, and their conversation was told to me by my coworker, since I was busy with other customers and couldn't hear them.
M= my coworker
M: Sir those are display. We can't sell them, but we can get someone to bring you some that aren't display items.
SC: You HAVE to sell them! I'll call the damn Better Business Bureau!
M:
Ok, but we still can't sell them.I heard this one tidbit of the conversation and piped in with, "We can't sell them because they've already been removed from inventory, and selling them would mess that up."
I didn't get a lot of the story, but what ended up happening was M went back to the department to personally help this man find all the non-display items. Half an hour later and MUCH bitching from the SC during the whole process, they're back at cash and M rings him through.
M is one lane over from me and I can hear the SC arguing about prices, paying for bags, blaming M because he (the SC) picked up a pillow of a different size (king, not standard) and was therefore more expensive.
Poor M had to deal with this guy for a full on 45 minutes and was exasperated after the fact.
I was impressed he took him off my hands for me, and later repaid the favour when we walked down to the Canadian Tire gas station and I bought his cigarettes for him, as he's underage.
Now everyone's happy.
THAT'S ILLEGAL! part deux/That's not AS-IS the sequel
We get a lot of random planks of wood in AS-IS that usually sell for $1. Sometimes things are not priced. When they're not priced they have to go back to the department, and do not get priced on the spot at cash by department coworkers.
A woman has a small plank of wood with no price.
I tell her I'll call the department about it (mostly to humour her) when I'm finished switching with the cashier who is on right now, and have rung through the customer who is ahead of her in line.
She says she wanted to go check something anyway, so she'll ask someone herself.
Ok, fine.
About five minutes later she comes back in a huff.
SC: So you're telling me I can't buy something without a price on it!?
Me: I am?
SC: I just got told in the AS-IS department that if something doesn't have a price on it they won't sell it.
Me: If that's their decision there's nothing I can do about it.
SC: Do you KNOW how long I've been shopping here? I've been coming to this exact store for 10 years!
Me: At this location?
SC: Yes this location!
Me: We've only been open for six.
SC: It's illegal not to sell something, you know!
Me: No it's not. Your total is $xx.xx.
Lady, let's get one thing straight: we don't HAVE to sell you a damn thing. In fact, this whole store could be nothing but a showroom of presumably purchasable items that you can't buy.
If we say no, the answer is no. Deal with it.
*sigh*
So all this on top of several people from my department running to HR to file complaints against two coworkers (a SUP and my manager), people crying, people yelling, my favourite LP guy leaving
and general insanity with lines, only having one cash accepting lane for almost an hour, one coworker throwing up in the cash office and having to go home, and being short staffed.Strangely enough I managed to stay in a good mood all day long.
Oh, AND I cut my finger, causing it to bleed.
This is a problem, since the sheer sight of blood makes me want to throw up; which I nearly did.
Though this had less of a nauseating effect than the sink full of vomit I encountered in the washroom yesterday.
Classy.
AAAAND (I just remembered this) I also dropped (while lifting) a set of bed slats on my collar bone.
Bed slats are the wooden planks all of my store's beds require. They're heavy and they're painful.
How I managed to drop them on my stupid bony, always sticking out, collar bone I'll never know.
Clearly I need a layer of fat on my upper chest to protect me from falling planks of wood.
Damn if the two days off I have starting tomorrow won't be the sweetest thing ever.
my bf & I almost did that cos we weren't sure the microwave & diy-cart would fit in a cab. until we saw that the delivery cost was about 59 bucks, and cab fair is 710 Yen (just a little under 7 bucks). Turned out it all fit in one cab. 
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