I'm a FEMALE YOU MORON! and more

[Phone Jockey]

Customer: Listen BOY (btw, I am NOT a male), you need to check with your repair guys in Burlington cause they’ve been working hard fixing the cable system here.

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Email: “If this tiling is in fact what is going on, then I will need to degrade my service.”

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Email: “The highest expression of love is to give without expecting and accept without exception. Hint hint!”

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Email: “I have been without most cable for over four days. What monetary gifts as well as pain and suffering (which is huge!) are you willing to offer? Otherwise I see no point in continuing any payment!!!!!!!!!

[JuniorMintz]

Email: “I have been without most cable for over four days. What monetary gifts as well as pain and suffering (which is huge!) are you willing to offer? Otherwise I see no point in continuing any payment!!!!!!!!!

Sorry sir, no monetary "gifts" today, however I'll be sure to rush right over to bring you some pain and suffering!

[Phone Jockey]

Sorry sir, no monetary "gifts" today, however I'll be sure to rush right over to bring you some pain and suffering!

Great comeback! Why didn't I think of that?

[Becks]

Email: “If this tiling is in fact what is going on, then I will need to degrade my service.”

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Email: “The highest expression of love is to give without expecting and accept without exception. Hint hint!”

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Email: “I have been without most cable for over four days. What monetary gifts as well as pain and suffering (which is huge!) are you willing to offer? Otherwise I see no point in continuing any payment!!!!!!!!!

--"Just by being a customer of ours, you degrade our service."

--"Boy, you're about as subtle as a train wreck, aren't ya, buddy?"

--"You say you've been without 'most' cable, which means you STILL had cable. You're paying, homefry."

Yep, I'm evil.

[One-Fang]

Customer: Listen BOY (btw, I am NOT a male), you need to check with your repair guys in Burlington cause they’ve been working hard fixing the cable system here.

(Assuming it was a man calling) We'll look right into that, Ma'am.

Email: “If this tiling is in fact what is going on, then I will need to degrade my service.”
No the tiling is not going on. In fact, the appearance of tiling is merely a figment of your imagination. Instead of hurling insults at your service, which will, by the way, do nothing as it is not sentient, you might want to consider consulting your local psychotherapist.

Email: “The highest expression of love is to give without expecting and accept without exception. Hint hint!”

We 'appreciate' the customers that pay their bills. We 'like' giving cable service and receiving due payment. Your mother 'loves' you. Give HER this advice.

Email: “I have been without most cable for over four days. What monetary gifts as well as pain and suffering (which is huge!) are you willing to offer? Otherwise I see no point in continuing any payment!!!!!!!!!

If you see no point in continuing payment we will gladly create a situation where the word 'most' in that complaint is no longer required.

[LostMyMind]

Customer: Listen BOY (btw, I am NOT a male), you need to check with your repair guys in Burlington cause they’ve been working hard fixing the cable system here.

I got nothing for this idiot. Maybe he was thinking that you were "black" and was trying a racial insult.

Email: “If this tiling is in fact what is going on, then I will need to degrade my service.”

This one I think I can translate. "He's getting the tiling on his t.v. while watching cable, he want to remove digital cable"

Email: “The highest expression of love is to give without expecting and accept without exception. Hint hint!”

Blunt as hell, but where was his love?

Email: “I have been without most cable for over four days. What monetary gifts as well as pain and suffering (which is huge!) are you willing to offer? Otherwise I see no point in continuing any payment!!!!!!!!!

Woot, another one I might translate correctly. "His cable has been intermittent cutting in and out over 4 days. He wants money for "pain and suffering" for being without cable. If he don't, he doing to stop paying for his cable for compensation.", which means he didn't have cable for 5 mins during his favorite show one weekend.

:hangs head in shame for being able to understand that:

[Phone Jockey]

I got nothing for this idiot. Maybe he was thinking that you were black and was trying a racial insult.

:hangs head in shame for being able to understand that:

I'm not sure what kind of weird racial slur that would be. I've never heard a black female called BOY either??

Don't feel bad. I've been an Idiot to English interpreter for at least the past 6 yrs...(working in call centers)

[LostMyMind]

Down in the south for many, many years. Calling a black man, "boy" was a way of calling him a servant. It's slowly dieing out of that context. But some folks are still touchy about hearing that word.

[Gurndigarn]

Email: “The highest expression of love is to give without expecting and accept without exception. Hint hint!”

"We're glad to hear that you plan to send us money without expecting any services in return. Nonetheless, in accordance with fair trade laws, we will continue to provide services to people we receive money from.

We do accept without exception, however."