Slightly Controversial

[Saydrah]

2) Not to make light of the women who were at the all-male review, and not to pick on the differently abled, but - putting this as nicely as possible - they were wheelchair bound. They sat in reclining wheelchairs with headrests and tray tables, which would indicate to me that they were in their chair all the time. One wore a helmet, and both wore bibs, and they constantly.......sorry for this......drooled. Their hands were kind of drawn up - fingers bent - hands bent at the wrist. In the 45 minutes I sat next to them before the show started, they did not seem to be able to talk, but rather just ........sorry again......... make random noise, so I really doubt that they asked to go. My cousin works with the "profoundly disabled" (her terminology), and these ladies reminded me of the ones my cousin works with.

Maybe you had to be there, but it looked like (and not just to me, but to the whole table I was sitting at and the tables around us) that they were just there because their caretakers wanted to be. One of the women at our table (and sister of my co-worker who I went with) was a caretaker for our local State-run home for the, um, mentally handicapped who have no one to take care of them was also of the opinion that these women were not asking to be there. She also didn't think much of the men hanging on their wheelchairs and gyrating in their faces and taking the money from their fingers that their caretakers put there.

FYI, many people who have multiple physical disabilities are no less able than any other human being to think and to appreciate life. If this is indeed the case, and it so often is, they are no less able to admire either a field of wildflowers or a room full of gyrating men than any able bodied woman. Touching someone's wheelchair without permission, though, is generally considered very rude.

http://davehingsburger.blogspot.com/2008/02/toast.html

That's a blog entry that describes someone who is severely physically disabled dealing with a caregiver who treats him like a child, and the response of another disabled man.

Just wanted to be sure that you know physical disabilities or inability to communicate in the ways able bodied people communicate doesn't necessarily mean that someone doesn't have average or above average intelligence. I wasn't there, so I'm not sure about the situation- it could have been extremely exploitative, or it could have been extremely empowering, depending upon whether the women wanted to be there or not.

[Bliss]

Not to make light of the women who were at the all-male review, and not to pick on the differently abled, but - putting this as nicely as possible - they were wheelchair bound. They sat in reclining wheelchairs with headrests and tray tables, which would indicate to me that they were in their chair all the time. One wore a helmet, and both wore bibs, and they constantly.......sorry for this......drooled. Their hands were kind of drawn up - fingers bent - hands bent at the wrist. In the 45 minutes I sat next to them before the show started, they did not seem to be able to talk, but rather just ........sorry again......... make random noise

Well what you describe sounds very very much like Palsy, and while Palsy is in most cases associated with mental retardation, it is not always so, there are people with Palsy that have a normal IQ, and about the speaking part, it's handled by the broca area in the brain, if this area has suffered damage (genetical or physical) you wouldn't be able to speak coherently, but you'd understand spoken language and be able both to read and write....

Btw Palsy makes it very hard for a person to control their muscles, but there are techniques in which such a person can write in paper or a PC with the help of a caregiver.

[Pagan]

'Mister, you ain't Mel Gibson, and this ain't Field of Dreams. We have built it. They have not applied.'

Uh, that was Kevin Costner. Mel Gibson is "FREEEEEEDOM!!!"

[Andara Bledin]

Man, what a twat!

He's the sort that gives everyone else who does the same job a bad name.

^-.-^

[edible_hat]

Just wanted to be sure that you know physical disabilities or inability to communicate in the ways able bodied people communicate doesn't necessarily mean that someone doesn't have average or above average intelligence.

Absolutely. My fiance is Deaf, quite intelligent and has a wicked sense of humour. She gets pissed off by people who treat her like she's got an intellectual disability. It's a communication barrier, that's all. And because she's profoundly (not completely) deaf and comes from a hearing family, breaking that barrier is as simple as speaking slowly and clearly. (Or pulling out a notepad and a pen).

But sometimes we run into people who question if she can handle M-rated movies or alcoholic drinks or act like I'm a carer. Actually I probably get more annoyed by it than she does.

[Wembley]

I'd like to know what a caregiver for disabled people is doing bringing them to a bar. Are they buying them liquor? Seems odd to me.

Why not? I would assume the person who hired the carer is the one paying. If the person is of age, then its up to them if they want to have a drink or two (or more! )

One of my colleagues has a condition called "cerebral palsy" which, in short, means that certain parts of the brain (usually concerned with movement) are damaged before or during birth. When he came to the US for a conference/"holiday", we spent the week together, I lent a hand helping with the physical aspects of getting around Chicago. Of course, when the day was done and we were in the hotel restaurant, he's sitting there drinking alcohol, I'm drinking Mountain Dew! (I don't drink)

It seemed that after the initial shock of "there is a man with a helmet sitting in a wheelchair at table 12 who wants a drink" wore off, the staff was surprised at what he drank instead of the fact he was there in the first place. I mean, come on, there has to be something wrong with someone who mixes Bailey's and Kalua! (I don't drink and even I know that!)

You might want to check out an entry in his blog that talks about this, with the title "74 ways of upsetting a disabled person" http://simonstevens.com/blog/?page_id=14 and scroll down to number 31.

I went to an "all male revue" once with some people I know, and was shocked that there were two women there in wheelchairs. They were very disabled - they were wearing bibs, and one had a helmet. They made noise, but didn't speak.

Again, this falls under the "why not?" category. Just because someone can't speak (or control their movements) doesnt mean they dont have any sex drive! http://simonstevens.com/blog/?page_id=14 item 15

I don't know who I was more angry at - the caregivers for bringing them, or the men in the revue who would gyrate at them. Disgusting on both levels. Trust me, those women in the wheelchairs didn't ask to be taken there that night.

I would have to ask, how did you know this? Just because someone can't speak, doesn't mean they don't have the ability to communicate their desires to visit a place like this. Many times folks with CP may have a different way of communicating, if their voice is hard to understand. This could be a picture board, a computerized communication system like a Dynavox or Lightwriter, sign language, or even an eye-gaze system.

For more information, check out items 22, 34, 50, and 64 on http://simonstevens.com/blog/?page_id=14

Just my thoughts on this.
-Wembley

[Jester]

...the staff was surprised at what he drank instead of the fact he was there in the first place. I mean, come on, there has to be something wrong with someone who mixes Bailey's and Kalua! (I don't drink and even I know that!)

Really? Then a lot of people are very wrong.

Since a lot of people love frozen mudslides. Which consist of vodka, Bailey's, Kahlua, vanilla ice cream, and chocolate syrup.

Sorry, the bartender in me had to point this out.

[retaildrone]

Quote:

Quoth AngryCas View Post
If life hands you lemons, you don't throw them in a blender whole and hope everything comes out OK. You make fucking lemonade. GOOD lemonade.

I thought it was "If life hands you lemons, put them down your shirt to make your boobs look bigger."

This is nowhere near as bad...but along the lines of a customer asking, "have you....?" and before hearing the answer launches in to a tirade about why your place of business should cater to whatever it is they are bitching about....

MOD EDIT: we don't need the whole thing quoted. - Seshat.

of course, after seating this changing station wench, I went to the bathroom I thought I saw it in and I was correct, there was a changing station in that restroom. I wanted to go back and tell her...but I decided that was a battle I didn't want to fight.

Those things are freaking NASTY. Why on earth would anyone put their child on a surface that was used to change countless other babies and MIGHT get a quick wipe down every once in a while? I seem to recall hearing that the changing tables had the most yuckies than any other place in a public restroom. The floor is cleaner.

I would lay my baby's stroller seat back flat and change her in there.

[Peppergirl]

I would lay my baby's stroller seat back flat and change her in there.

I know I'm veering into OT land, but please bear with me. I'm stranded in the house due to a blizzard.

My kids are older, and we didn't have any of the fancy gadgets to make life easier when changing a diaper. But somehow I always, ALWAYS managed to change my kids' diapers in situations where there wasn't a nasty changing table available. It just takes a little bit of thought, and a willingness to inconvenience yourself a little bit, but it can be done.

And ITA, many of those changing tables are just nasty looking.

[retaildrone]

I know I'm veering into OT land, but please bear with me. I'm stranded in the house due to a blizzard.

My kids are older, and we didn't have any of the fancy gadgets to make life easier when changing a diaper. But somehow I always, ALWAYS managed to change my kids' diapers in situations where there wasn't a nasty changing table available. It just takes a little bit of thought, and a willingness to inconvenience yourself a little bit, but it can be done.

And ITA, many of those changing tables are just nasty looking.

My DD is now 5 and we were just too broke for the fancy gadgets, lol. Really, babies don't need a lot of gadgets and gizmos.

If we were eating out or somewhere where we did not have her stroller, we would take her out to the car or some out of the way place.

Those changing stations make me wanna barf.

[Becks]

Since a lot of people love frozen mudslides. Which consist of vodka, Bailey's, Kahlua, vanilla ice cream, and chocolate syrup.

Can the bartender in you make me one? :batting eyelashes:

[PepperElf]

either that or when he said "SC: I bet you have, and I bet they weren't hired because of their disability.".... just ask him for proof of it.

without proof he's just slandering you

[Seshat]

Those things are freaking NASTY. Why on earth would anyone put their child on a surface that was used to change countless other babies and MIGHT get a quick wipe down every once in a while?

That's why you (a) carry antibacterial wipes in your nappy bag, and/or (b) carry a baby change mat in your nappy bag. Perhaps in a separate pocket.

Simple way to make a baby change mat:
- get a piece of PUL or other waterproof cloth and a piece of lovely soft fleece (preferably hydrophobic).
- cut both pieces to about an inch larger than you want it. Put them together, back to back (wrong sides together) and hold them together temporarily with clips - quilting clips, hairclips, pegs, whatever works. Pins will do if you don't mind piercing the PUL.
- sew them together half an inch from the edge, along three sides. Remove all clips.
- turn it back the other way around, so the right sides are outside.
- fold half an inch of the unsewn edge inside, pin or clip, then sew.

Carry that with you, wash it in the washing machine (get the washing instructions with the fabrics). If it gets ick on it, use a nappy/diaper-cleaning detergent and follow the instructions on that. Napisan in Australia is terrific.

The fleece feels good on the baby's skin, and the waterproof layer protects baby, mat and you from other baby's ickinesses.

If you want something thinner to carry, replace the fleece with any other fabric that's easy to wash and feels good on/is safe for your baby's skin.

I would lay my baby's stroller seat back flat and change her in there.

Also a viable alternative.

[retaildrone]

I had a changing pad, used it all the time....just not on those nasty changing tables.

You would not believe the number of people who will just plop their baby on the changing table with no blanket, pad or anything under them

[TryNotToBeThatOne]

Uh, that was Kevin Costner. Mel Gibson is "FREEEEEEDOM!!!"

I said that it was my first thought, not a correct one. Yeah, my memory makes a leaky sieve look watertight. Unless of course it's completely trivia.

And Pagan, I know that my typewritten words cannot convey my tone so I'll say it straight out, I'm not surprised that I made that mistake and thanks for the correction.