Shortest Fuse Ever

[HawaiianShirts]

I've seen customers get angry rather quickly. Sometimes I've even gone from normal to mad in a few seconds. This guy, though... if he didn't hold the world record for quickest temper, he was certainly in the running for it.

Sometime last week, I'm at the employee computer terminal in my store's Computers department looking up some information for a nice older couple. Short Fuse Guy approaches and states that he wants to ask a quick question. I know there's no such thing as a "quick question," but I decide to humor him. I'd been having a pretty good day and was just returning from two whole days off, so I managed to stay pretty relaxed through the whole exchange.

SFG: I just want to know where you keep your laptop batteries.
Me: We don't, actually.
SFG: You don't have any?
Me: No, sir.

Ssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss.. . POP!

SFG: WELL, WHY NOT?!
Me: Several reasons. We don't have many people who come in asking for them, so corporate doesn't view it as being profitable to carry a selection of batteries in the stores. And there are far to many of them for us to keep here.
SFG: What do you mean "too many?"
Me: There are dozens, if not hundreds, of manufacturers of notebook computers. Each one of them has many different notebook model series, and each series takes its own specially-designed battery. Then you'd have the selection of two or three different capacities for each series, and we'd probably have to carry an assortment of new batteries from the OEM, new third party, and refurbished. My guess: we'd have to dedicate three whole aisles to notebook batteries. There's just no room.

Ssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss... POW!

SFG: WELL THAT DOESN'T DO ME ANY GOOD!
Me: I can probably special order one for you.
SFG: How long would THAT take?
Me: Assuming what you need is in stock, shipping can take up to one week.

Sssssssssssssssssssssss... BANG!

SFG: RrrrrrRRRRAAARGFH!

He spins and starts storming off just as I am trying to explain to him that there is a shop in a town about 15 minutes away by the freeway that carries nothing but batteries for various electronic devices, but he just kept walking. He found a woman (his wife, I suppose) looking at printers, and I overheard his last explosion.

SFG: They don't have it. This place is f... Screw it.
Wife: What, honey?

Sssss... KABLOOIE!!!

SFG: Oh ! I SAID LET'S GO!!!

And he took her by the arm and pulled her toward the front of the store.

The best part happened later. When I finished with the nice and patient older couple, one of my managers showed up.

Mgr: Hey, HS, I just got a call complaining about you. Some guy said you were rude and condescending and refused to help him find something... Do you know what that's all about?
Me: Oh, yeah. That guy. (relates story)
Mgr: ... Y'know, I don't know why I even bother following up on complaints about you.

Score one for me!

[LifeCarnie]

Shame on your store!!

Don't you know that you are supposed to stock everything ever made, just in case, maybe, someone would actually come in and want to buy something once.

We have the same problem with EKG printer paper and Ultrasound film. We don't even make the machines, we are just an OEM manufacturer of both. Yet we are supposed to make and stock film and paper for every machine ever made, no matter how old or obscure the machine that they're using may be.

And don't even try to suggest contacting the original manufacturer!! Oh, no that takes making an effort, something an SC is unwilling to attempt.

Which is why SC's never really go to the competitor (even though they threaten to), it just takes too much effort.

[digilight]

I hear your pain. My company has among other things a copy shop. Yup I do copies. I've had folks call me looking for different types of paper. Ok that in and of itself isn't a problem cause being a copy shop I have to be able to get a wide range of papers, and get them quickly.

The problem comes when its a real odd/bizarre type of paper. I had a fellow call me over the weekend a couple of weeks ago. At about 6pm on a saturday (I forward my office phones to my cell phone when ever I leave the office), this guy called up asking for a paper that was 16# bound or lighter and had to be white. He needed it for screen printing.

Now I have a friend who does screen printing and I know that he uses Velums to develop his screens (I would assume it would be the same material).

The guy wasn't sucky, and I gave him a few idea's. Unfortunantly everywhere I could go for the stock would have been allready closed until monday (Thats actually why he was calling around to print/copy shops himself).

The other thing I get called on is for copier/printer repair. I'm a fucking copy shop, I just run 'em into the ground, I don't fix 'em. Hell I want yours to break so you have to come to me to run the job Yup I'm a bastard aint I.

[Lioness Blackfire]

You win!

Also, I think I ran into this guy...

So my mom and I had stopped in at the local gas station. While we were waiting in line, an older gentleman just ahead of us accidentally bumped into my mother and he turned around and profusely apologized. He seemed perfectly calm, sincere, and I actually thought to myself 'What a nice fellow'.

Then his turn came in line. He walked up the counter and immediately started yelling incoherently at the cashier! He rants at the poor guy for maybe a whole minute (getting louder with each sentence) while the cashier wordlessly rings up his purchases. When offered a receipt, he grabs it, yells something like "Well, at least I can get a receipt in a place like this!" and storms out!

My mom and I are standing there like the whole time. I have no idea what got into him. It was absolutely bizarre.

/threadjack

[Difdi]

Mgr: ... Y'know, I don't know why I even bother following up on complaints about you.

That's always the best kind of rep to have with management.

[Geek King]

Don't you know that you are supposed to stock everything ever made, just in case, maybe, someone would actually come in and want to buy something once.

I think there was a store like that in the Spellsinger novels by Alan Dean Foster. The Store of Aethyr & Nether, I believe. Carried everything from everytime! I believe it took a well-provisioned party several days to get to some of the isles.