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Yes, I called him "Chief." (longish)
one of my coworkers comes up and says the guy on the phone wants to talk to someone "who sounds like they know what they're doing". oohhhh yeah. asshole right off the bat=i can be as snarky as i want. i take the call.
"hi this is B&NG, how can i help you?"
"well, you sound smarter than the other girl that answered. i hope you know what you're doing."
"i assure you we're all fairly competent here. what do you want?"
"well, let me get my papers and shit..."
":loud sigh: i'm waiting..."
here he goes into this loooooooooooooong rambling explanation of his issue, using the words "essentially" and "basically" about 612 times. bottom line is that he wants to check the status of an out of print order that we placed for him. to check the status, he needs to have an account set up at bn.com, which is something we at the stores are specifically told NOT to do, since that would require us to get someone's password and shit. the way its set up is buggier than the amazon in august. we try to avoid doing it because of issues like this.
"the only thing i can do is give you the 800 number for bn.com customer service."
"no. i remove from you all powers of cop-out."
"whoa, you're pretty powerful, there, chief."
"i wont accept a cop out. you have more power with managers and corporate as an employee than i ever could. you call for me."
i actually started laughing at this point. i am a second class citizen to these people. i have no power whatsoever. corporate would sooner tell me to eat a dick than listen to an honest complaint, while if a customer comes up with some bullshit thats almost a guaranteed $50 gift card.
:louder sigh: "fine. give me your phone number and i'll get back to as soon as i figure this out. does that work for you?"
so i get all his info and shit, and i call bn.com customer service, who pretty much tell me that because i am not the actual customer, they cant tell me shit. which is what i was expecting. i call him back and get to leave a message.
"hi, (mr. douchebag 3000), this is B&NG calling to let you know that because i am unfortunately NOT YOU, they can't tell me anything. bn.com customer service is (1800fucktard). thank you and have a GREAT day."
he calls back and first accuses M, who answered, of being incompetent because she didn't know what the hell he was talking about. she had no knowledge of his issues. then when manager K gets him, she spends about a half hour explaining to him that we've done all we can and its all up to him. he calls her incompetent and rude (pot, meet kettle.) before hanging up. K called corporate herself, because we know he's going to complain about one or all of us being mean or unfair or whatever, so she figured she'd get the jump on it.
we'll see what happens. i'm sure K will get written up for losing a "valued customer", and me, M, and A (the first girl who answered) will all get yelled at for being rude and incompetent by our DM, Grimace.
"hi this is B&NG, how can i help you?"
"well, you sound smarter than the other girl that answered. i hope you know what you're doing."
"i assure you we're all fairly competent here. what do you want?"
"well, let me get my papers and shit..."
":loud sigh: i'm waiting..."
here he goes into this loooooooooooooong rambling explanation of his issue, using the words "essentially" and "basically" about 612 times. bottom line is that he wants to check the status of an out of print order that we placed for him. to check the status, he needs to have an account set up at bn.com, which is something we at the stores are specifically told NOT to do, since that would require us to get someone's password and shit. the way its set up is buggier than the amazon in august. we try to avoid doing it because of issues like this.
"the only thing i can do is give you the 800 number for bn.com customer service."
"no. i remove from you all powers of cop-out."
"whoa, you're pretty powerful, there, chief."
"i wont accept a cop out. you have more power with managers and corporate as an employee than i ever could. you call for me."
i actually started laughing at this point. i am a second class citizen to these people. i have no power whatsoever. corporate would sooner tell me to eat a dick than listen to an honest complaint, while if a customer comes up with some bullshit thats almost a guaranteed $50 gift card.
:louder sigh: "fine. give me your phone number and i'll get back to as soon as i figure this out. does that work for you?"
so i get all his info and shit, and i call bn.com customer service, who pretty much tell me that because i am not the actual customer, they cant tell me shit. which is what i was expecting. i call him back and get to leave a message.
"hi, (mr. douchebag 3000), this is B&NG calling to let you know that because i am unfortunately NOT YOU, they can't tell me anything. bn.com customer service is (1800fucktard). thank you and have a GREAT day."
he calls back and first accuses M, who answered, of being incompetent because she didn't know what the hell he was talking about. she had no knowledge of his issues. then when manager K gets him, she spends about a half hour explaining to him that we've done all we can and its all up to him. he calls her incompetent and rude (pot, meet kettle.) before hanging up. K called corporate herself, because we know he's going to complain about one or all of us being mean or unfair or whatever, so she figured she'd get the jump on it.
we'll see what happens. i'm sure K will get written up for losing a "valued customer", and me, M, and A (the first girl who answered) will all get yelled at for being rude and incompetent by our DM, Grimace.
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