How many times do I have to say, "We don't carry it"?

[XCashier]

Are you really sure that you don't have it in the back somewhere!?

http://www.dailyink.com/en-us/conten...feature=Retail
Check out the January 10 strip.

[I_Hate_SCs]

How good are your guys' counts, though? At my store, our counts are frequently off by a LOT, so it does us no good to check our on-hand quantity. Interestingly enough, though, my counts have been a lot more accurate ever since I started security-tagging *EVERYTHING*....

Grr!

Our counts aren't perfect. Every now and then I'll come across something not located in the backroom but is back there. When I try to add it to its location, the handheld computer prompts me that it is either on clearance (should've been long gone of course) or its so old it says not on file. Usually the counts are in our favor when a customer asks for a backroom location, since it would say its not in the back, but its sitting back there on a flat or similar structure waiting to be put out on the floor. At least it saves a trip back there sometimes.

[Jester]

You sure that you just didn't see it, and the 100th time he asks it'll magically appear? *Hides Behind Tito*

Since I am a magician (no, really) in addition to my food service roles, and many people down here often know that, I often get this:

SC: "Can I have a Corona Lite?"
ME: "Sorry, we don't carry Corona Lite. Can I get you something else?"
SC: "Well, you're a magician. Can't you make one just magically appear?"

...OR...

SC: "I'd like my steak well done, and I'm in a hurry."
ME: "Sir, your well done steak WILL take longer to cook."
SC: "Well, you're a magician. Can't you make it just magically appear?"

I love doing magic, I really really do....but there are times when I truly want to throttle people for being so damn "clever!"

[MadMike]

SC: "Well, you're a magician. Can't you make one just magically appear?"

"No, but I can turn you into an asshole. PRESTO! ...Hmm, nothing happened."

[Tigress]

I got that a lot when working at Cingular. Since the store was roughly the size of my living room (maybe a tad bigger), took over checking inventory in and out from my boss, and was the main person responsible for stocking shelves (I worked pretty damn hard for being "only" a greeter), I knew everything that was on the floor and in the back. Nothing came in or left without my knowledge. So when I said we didn't have something, we really didn't have it.

Yet, customers were positive that I was lying to them when I said we didn't have the item they wanted.

"Do you have any V60s?"
"No, ma'am, we don't."
"Are you sure? Can't you check?"
"Ma'am, I saw the last one we had get sold ten minutes ago. I know we don't have any left."
"Can you check anyway?"
*does a fake check*
"No, ma'am. We don't have any. Like I said, the last one was sold ten minutes ago. If you check back in a few days, we should have some more in stock."
*exaggerated sigh* "Ooooooooooookay. I guess I'll check back later."

A few days later. We do indeed get more in, but only 10-15. Half of them are grabbed up by the sales reps before I can check them in and I have to retrieve them and write their serial numbers down because they can't wait 5 damn seconds. The other half are sold within a few hours.
"Hi. I called a few days ago. Do you have more V60s in yet?"
"We did. But they sold out by noon. It's a very popular phone, so they tend to sell out quickly. I can have a sales rep reserve one for you. "
"Well, you people aren't helpful at all! I'm just going to take my business to Verizon!"
"Sorry, to lose you as a customer. If I could wave a magic wand and make these phones appear, I would. Here's the number to customer service."

So glad I don't work retail anymore.

[XCashier]

SC: "Well, you're a magician. Can't you make one just magically appear?"

"No, but I can turn you into an asshole. PRESTO! ...Hmm, nothing happened."

Easiest magic trick in the world!