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Number 1
Me: -Opening Dialog-
SC: I'd like to only make an order today.
Me: -sighing internally at the stupidity of that statement- Okay, I can help with that today.
SC: Okay, I'd like to repeat the last order I had, with the Widgets.
Me: Okay, you had three green widgets, four blue widgets, nine yellow widgets.
SC: Yeah, but I want six purple widgets, ten orange widgets, and twenty pink widgets
Me: So you want a new order today, with completely different widgets?
SC: No, I want the same order as before, with different color and amounts of widgets.
Me: So, this an order, with new widget colors, and with new amounts?
SC: No, it's the same order, with different color widgets and different amounts, but with the exact same order.
Me: I need to transfer you to your area manager, have a great day.
Number 2
Me: -Opening Dialog-
SC: I would like to reorder some pink widgets today, with the green writing on them.
Me: I can help you with that, that's item XYZ4444, with Green writing, quantity of 20, am I correct?
SC: That's the same item as before? Let me check.
—---------------Five Minutes Later-----------------------------
SC: Yes, that's item XYZ4444, with Green writing, quantity of 20.
Me: Okay, item XYZ4444, with Green writing, quantity of 20. I will put that down in the order.
SC: Wait a minute let me check to see if that's the same as the order before.
—---------------Five Minutes Later-----------------------------
SC: Yes, most definitely item XYZ4444, with Green writing, quantity of 20.
Me: Okay, so it's most definitely item XYZ4444, with Green writing, quantity of 20? I'll put that down in the order, let me make a note to make sure it's exactly like it was before.
SC: (Voice instantly guarded) Why are you putting a note in the order?
Me: To make sure that it is exactly as you had it before.
SC: (Voice sounding unsure) I don't know about that, I don't like notes in my orders, it's extra paper I don't want to deal with.
Me: Ma'am the notes are internal, within the computer, it tells the warehouse people exactly how you want your item to be, so that way it's 100% correct.
SC: (Voice sounding desperate now) But I don't want a note in my order, it's extra paper, and I'll have to throw that paper out.
Me: (Voice calm, and relaxed) The notes are not going into a paper copy in your order, the notes are internal, so that your order will be 100% accurate to your needs.
SC: (Needily voice) Well then I don't want the order...-click-
—----------------Two Weeks Later---------------------
Cool Coworker: Hey Ratts, I put an order through two days ago with this lady, and she said she spoke to you about it and you were going to have a note put in that said she didn't know anything about her order.
Me: Uh no, I was putting in a note and I explained it to her that it would be for her benefit, to make sure the order was 100% accurate, a bit of a CYA for her and I.
Cool Coworker: Yeah, well I didn't put a note in the order, and she returned the entire thing, screaming for an apology, because she said she wanted blue writing, when I know she asked for green, because she wanted the same order as before.
Me: Yep, that's why I told her I was putting a note in the order, because I knew she was going to return the order or ask for a discount for the order.
Number 3
Me: -Opening Dialog-
SC: I would like to make a payment today.
Me: I can help you with that.
SC: Oh yeah, I know I owe $10,000, and it's ten months past due, could you remove the $100 late fee from my account?
Me: I will have to talk to my supervisor about that, I know I can take the payment for the $10,000 right now.
SC: I won't make the payment unless the $100 late fee is taken off my account.
Me: Let me send you to Mark in the billing department, he'll be able to help you a little better than I, he has more information in his computer than I do.
—--------------------10 Minutes Later----------------------
Mark: Hey Ratts, I had a customer who said you wouldn't take his payment if he didn't pay his $100 late fee.
Me: Incorrect Mark, I explained that I would have to talk to my supervisor, IE you, about removing the $100 late fee, and he became upset.
Mark: Well, I basically told him I could remove the $100 late fee, but his account would then become a prepay account and he would have to use a check or credit card to order from then on, or he could pay the late fee. He paid the late fee and then told me to close his account.
Number Four
Me: -Opening Dialog-
SC: Yeah, you took an order from me last week for my widgets and the spelling of business is incorrect. You spelled the word as "centre" which is the European way, and I wanted it to be spelled as "center" the American way.
Me: Okay let me see, I have a note in the order that says you wanted it spelled the European way, and I did have a fax copy sent to you, that you did approve.
SC: This is bull, I wanted it spelled as center, I want to talk to your manager.
Me: Okay sir, let me get all your information, the date of the call and the time, so that my supervisor can have the call queued up, so both of you can listen to it together.
SC: You record your calls? I didn't know that.
Me: Sir, it's at the very beginning of the call, every call is recorded for quality assurance.
SC: Well, I don't want to talk to your supervisor, I want you to fix this for me.
Me: Sir, since you've asked for my supervisor, I have to send you over there now, let me finish writing down your information by hand, so I can hand it to my boss with my signature on it, that way we can make sure your situation is handled officially.
SC: Well, never mind then, if you can't help me, then I guess I'll not do business with you again. -click-
—----------One Hour Later----------------------
Cool Supervisor: Ratts, I just got off a call that was transferred to me by Coworker A, and this guy said you refused to send him a new order, and that it was all his fault that his order was wrong.
Me: CS, if you could check out the notes in the order and listen to both calls, you'll see I was rather polite and informative to the customer, and I wanted to make sure his order was correct. I mean, I'm not going to get into trouble with you, if I help the customer, because you've said mistakes happen.
Cool Supervisor: I did listen to both calls, you were correct both times, I wanted to make sure you understood that you were doing your job correctly and that you were confident in your actions with the customer.
Me: Thank you CS, I appreciate that.
Me: -Opening Dialog-
SC: I'd like to only make an order today.
Me: -sighing internally at the stupidity of that statement- Okay, I can help with that today.
SC: Okay, I'd like to repeat the last order I had, with the Widgets.
Me: Okay, you had three green widgets, four blue widgets, nine yellow widgets.
SC: Yeah, but I want six purple widgets, ten orange widgets, and twenty pink widgets
Me: So you want a new order today, with completely different widgets?
SC: No, I want the same order as before, with different color and amounts of widgets.
Me: So, this an order, with new widget colors, and with new amounts?
SC: No, it's the same order, with different color widgets and different amounts, but with the exact same order.
Me: I need to transfer you to your area manager, have a great day.
Number 2
Me: -Opening Dialog-
SC: I would like to reorder some pink widgets today, with the green writing on them.
Me: I can help you with that, that's item XYZ4444, with Green writing, quantity of 20, am I correct?
SC: That's the same item as before? Let me check.
—---------------Five Minutes Later-----------------------------
SC: Yes, that's item XYZ4444, with Green writing, quantity of 20.
Me: Okay, item XYZ4444, with Green writing, quantity of 20. I will put that down in the order.
SC: Wait a minute let me check to see if that's the same as the order before.
—---------------Five Minutes Later-----------------------------
SC: Yes, most definitely item XYZ4444, with Green writing, quantity of 20.
Me: Okay, so it's most definitely item XYZ4444, with Green writing, quantity of 20? I'll put that down in the order, let me make a note to make sure it's exactly like it was before.
SC: (Voice instantly guarded) Why are you putting a note in the order?
Me: To make sure that it is exactly as you had it before.
SC: (Voice sounding unsure) I don't know about that, I don't like notes in my orders, it's extra paper I don't want to deal with.
Me: Ma'am the notes are internal, within the computer, it tells the warehouse people exactly how you want your item to be, so that way it's 100% correct.
SC: (Voice sounding desperate now) But I don't want a note in my order, it's extra paper, and I'll have to throw that paper out.
Me: (Voice calm, and relaxed) The notes are not going into a paper copy in your order, the notes are internal, so that your order will be 100% accurate to your needs.
SC: (Needily voice) Well then I don't want the order...-click-
—----------------Two Weeks Later---------------------
Cool Coworker: Hey Ratts, I put an order through two days ago with this lady, and she said she spoke to you about it and you were going to have a note put in that said she didn't know anything about her order.
Me: Uh no, I was putting in a note and I explained it to her that it would be for her benefit, to make sure the order was 100% accurate, a bit of a CYA for her and I.
Cool Coworker: Yeah, well I didn't put a note in the order, and she returned the entire thing, screaming for an apology, because she said she wanted blue writing, when I know she asked for green, because she wanted the same order as before.
Me: Yep, that's why I told her I was putting a note in the order, because I knew she was going to return the order or ask for a discount for the order.
Number 3
Me: -Opening Dialog-
SC: I would like to make a payment today.
Me: I can help you with that.
SC: Oh yeah, I know I owe $10,000, and it's ten months past due, could you remove the $100 late fee from my account?
Me: I will have to talk to my supervisor about that, I know I can take the payment for the $10,000 right now.
SC: I won't make the payment unless the $100 late fee is taken off my account.
Me: Let me send you to Mark in the billing department, he'll be able to help you a little better than I, he has more information in his computer than I do.
—--------------------10 Minutes Later----------------------
Mark: Hey Ratts, I had a customer who said you wouldn't take his payment if he didn't pay his $100 late fee.
Me: Incorrect Mark, I explained that I would have to talk to my supervisor, IE you, about removing the $100 late fee, and he became upset.
Mark: Well, I basically told him I could remove the $100 late fee, but his account would then become a prepay account and he would have to use a check or credit card to order from then on, or he could pay the late fee. He paid the late fee and then told me to close his account.
Number Four
Me: -Opening Dialog-
SC: Yeah, you took an order from me last week for my widgets and the spelling of business is incorrect. You spelled the word as "centre" which is the European way, and I wanted it to be spelled as "center" the American way.
Me: Okay let me see, I have a note in the order that says you wanted it spelled the European way, and I did have a fax copy sent to you, that you did approve.
SC: This is bull, I wanted it spelled as center, I want to talk to your manager.
Me: Okay sir, let me get all your information, the date of the call and the time, so that my supervisor can have the call queued up, so both of you can listen to it together.
SC: You record your calls? I didn't know that.
Me: Sir, it's at the very beginning of the call, every call is recorded for quality assurance.
SC: Well, I don't want to talk to your supervisor, I want you to fix this for me.
Me: Sir, since you've asked for my supervisor, I have to send you over there now, let me finish writing down your information by hand, so I can hand it to my boss with my signature on it, that way we can make sure your situation is handled officially.
SC: Well, never mind then, if you can't help me, then I guess I'll not do business with you again. -click-
—----------One Hour Later----------------------
Cool Supervisor: Ratts, I just got off a call that was transferred to me by Coworker A, and this guy said you refused to send him a new order, and that it was all his fault that his order was wrong.
Me: CS, if you could check out the notes in the order and listen to both calls, you'll see I was rather polite and informative to the customer, and I wanted to make sure his order was correct. I mean, I'm not going to get into trouble with you, if I help the customer, because you've said mistakes happen.
Cool Supervisor: I did listen to both calls, you were correct both times, I wanted to make sure you understood that you were doing your job correctly and that you were confident in your actions with the customer.
Me: Thank you CS, I appreciate that.
Can we clone him?I want one of my very own. I will hug him & pet him & call him George.
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