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An Epic Tale: Guitar Hero and Alcohol don't always mix. (long, infuriating)

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  • An Epic Tale: Guitar Hero and Alcohol don't always mix. (long, infuriating)

    This is the story of one of the craziest customers (or drunkest, it goes both ways) we've ever had, a woman so persistent in being nuts that we are still dealing with her as we have been for the past month. I've only talked to her once on the phone, and at that time I didn't know who she was, but everyone else did because of this ongoing battle. This story is mostly that of my managers', but it needs to be told. I'll start off with that phone conversation and how I was introduced to Ms. Crazy Drunk Bitch (here on out known as CDB).

    Me: Thanks for calling (store), blah blah blah how can I help you?
    CDB: Are you smart?
    Me: ...I would like to think so..
    CDB: I want to talk to the smartest person you have there and if you aren't it then don't talk to me.
    Me: (aaaaand we're done, you rude bitch.) Let me get a manager.

    I hand the phone to J. And for the next hour, he is trying desperately to talk to the woman on the phone, but I could tell whenever he opened his mouth that he was being interrupted. He got in maybe two words the entire time he was on the phone. His face was getting grimmer and grimmer and he was starting to get mad. When he was done, he told me this story:

    Apparently, she had bought Guitar Hero 1, 2, and rock the 80s for Little Precious (who, come to find out, was some 16 year old punk kid). The only problem was that she had a PS3, so she would need the updates, a PS2 guitar, and an adapter to play the games. So after berating the crap out of R, the store manager, a couple days before this call occured, he chocked it up to a loss and gave her the adapter for free. The only problem was that she didn't tell him she had a PS3 guitar. And she had bought all of this crap at Christmas and was just now bitching about it.

    So J told her to bring in her PS3 guitar and we would trade it out for a PS2 guitar and give her the difference in cash, which is in policy if the receipt is present. J told her on the phone to specifically bring the receipt. Please don't come without the receipt. She comes in without the receipt, yells that R gave her horrible customer service, and stumbled around, obviously inebriated (which makes me wonder how she drove..). J, after much forehead slapping and getting yelled at, just put it through without the receipt, because, as we agreed after she left, special concessions must be made for special people. He also called Sony for her to make sure that everything should work alright after that, and wrote down detailed instructions for her to burn the updates to a CD after downloading them and putt hem in the PS3 since it wasn't hooked up to the internet. She leaves.

    And calls back the next day. Nothing was working! Everyone there was horrible and stupid and just trying to ruin Little Precious' day! And, if I heard correctly, she had returned the adapter the day before J switched out the guitars and NOW IT WON'T WORK RAAARGH! (a fact that she hadn't told J when she came in). Oh god. So she decides she wants to try the PS3 guitar again. As in she didn't listen to us, so, go figure, nothing is working. T tells her sure, whatever, we'll hold one for her.

    So a couple of days ago today, she is coming in as I am leaving. She's brought the PS2 guitar with her. Which means she's going to return it (probably without the receipt), and get the PS3 guitar again, starting the cycle anew. Also before I was out the door, I got a long hard look at her stumbling through the store to the counter and her completely bloodshot eyes. Pretty sure she was drunk again.

    I'm not sure what happened after that, but when I worked yesterday I got a call from the manager of our sister store telling us that she had come in there with her husband raising hell, telling him how horrible we were, that she was now his customer, etc, etc. I advised him that no matter what he does she will not listen to a single word of advice so you know, don't make too much effort. She was apparently now not only bitching about guitar hero, but now Rock Band as well, which she had the PS2 version of. Which won't work on a PS3 since there's a PS3 version of it as well (duh.) He told her that. Wasn't acceptable, and she wanted it switched out for free (there's a $10 difference). Whatever, he said, he'd do it because I imagine she yelled at him just as much as she yelled at us.

    I told R that he had called, and R informs me that she had called us again just the other day and was loudly weeping on the phone to him, something about LIttle Precious and her husband and everyone was yelling at her. And before she started crying he could hardly understand her because she was slurring her words so bad.

    So god knows if she'll ever get those games to work on her PS3. There will probably be updates to this. I mean, she could shell out an extra ten bucks over the cost of a guitar and just buy a PS2, but that would make things way too easy. Sigh.
    Would you like a Stummies?

  • #2
    Don't you love the parents who buy stuff for the kids and don't even know what they already own? One would think that, especially if it involves video games, that would be important. Why couldn't she just give the stuff with receipt to the kid and let him exchange it?

    If I owned a game store, she would be so banned. Along with possibly a call to the cops if she had obviously driven there while plastered.
    "I am quite confident that I do exist."
    "Excuse me, I'm making perfect sense. You're just not keeping up." The Doctor

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    • #3
      Yeah I would have stalled her for as long as it took for the cops to show up. Up here public drunkeness lands you in the drunk tank.

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      • #4
        Me, too. I'd have sooooo called the cops on her drunk ass. It's bad enough when they're sober.

        ^-.-^
        Faith is about what you do. It's about aspiring to be better and nobler and kinder than you are. It's about making sacrifices for the good of others. - Dresden

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        • #5
          same; after the drunk was confirmed, a discreet phone call to the police, a stall for her and she gets what she needs, without even knowing it.

          as for the rest of her crap, i'd love to say 'too bad, so sad; try buying when SOBER, dumbass,' but we all know that's not an option.
          look! it's ghengis khan!
          Sorry, but while I can do many things, extracting heads from anuses isn't one of them. (so sayeth the irv)

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          • #6
            Quoth marty View Post
            I told R that he had called, and R informs me that she had called us again just the other day and was loudly weeping on the phone to him, something about LIttle Precious and her husband and everyone was yelling at her. And before she started crying he could hardly understand her because she was slurring her words so bad.
            How pathetic does your life have to be when the only number you can drunk dial is a retail store? Did her friends all have her blocked? Yeesh.
            The Rich keep getting richer because they keep doing what it was that made them rich. Ditto the Poor.
            "Hy kan tell dey is schmot qvestions, dey is makink my head hurt."
            Hoc spatio locantur.

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            • #7
              Here's a novel idea....

              Next time she pulls that shit, how about passing a nearby customer a 20 dollar bill to call the cops on her and have her arrested for public intoxication. I know that I would NOT want to walk into ANY store with my kids and have them be exposed to some loud-mouth drunkard running their foul-smelling heavyweight mouth.

              Better yet, if you SEE her DRIVING there to the store then you really have a moral obligation to report her as a drunk driver. Personally I've been in FOUR major car wrecks, none of which were my fault. That's what really hits a nerve with me. We've got way too many idiot drivers on the road as it is. What if she hit and killed someone driving to your store?
              Last edited by ditchdj; 05-05-2008, 09:50 PM.

              Comment


              • #8
                Quoth Geek King View Post
                How pathetic does your life have to be when the only number you can drunk dial is a retail store? Did her friends all have her blocked? Yeesh.
                What friends?

                Jose Cuervo and Johnny Walker, black and red?
                Just because a customer expects you to put some effort into your job, that does not make them an SC.

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                • #9
                  I'm not 100% positive that she's actually drunk, but if anyone is actually just like that then I can go ahead and kill off the rest of my faith in humanity.

                  SM at the other store said next time he saw her he was calling mall security on her.
                  Would you like a Stummies?

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                  • #10
                    Another novel idea: How about the friggn kid figure out what is needed. I know like on one that let their parents do the electroic buying for them. Seems like this family has a great deal of problems, however. It's all rather sad.
                    When it comes to getting things done, we need fewer architects and more bricklayers. ---Colleen C. Barrett---

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                    • #11
                      Quoth LifeCarnie View Post
                      What friends?

                      Jose Cuervo and Johnny Walker, black and red?
                      Don't forget Jimmy Beam and Bud Wieser. Maybe even the Saint Pauli Girl...
                      The Rich keep getting richer because they keep doing what it was that made them rich. Ditto the Poor.
                      "Hy kan tell dey is schmot qvestions, dey is makink my head hurt."
                      Hoc spatio locantur.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Since you didn't call the cops, you just had to deal with her. Your own fault.
                        Broadcasting to you live from the nerve center of my brain..... szzzt *we are currently experiencing technical difficulties, please stand by*

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                        • #13
                          Seems to me she's effectively the poster girl for why you shouldn't buy home electronics while drunk/stoned/stupid out of your mind...

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                          • #14

                            I just have to point out an instance where Guitar Hero and alcohol DO mix.

                            Every Wednesday at the bar I frequent is Rock N Roll Pornography. I've only been to one of those nights once because, well, it's on a Wednesday.
                            Anyway, it's a Guitar Hero competition played on a large projection screen.
                            If you disrobe (no one to my knowledge has ever gone to their birthday suit) you get a free shot of Jager, but of course you're not required to remove any of your clothes.
                            This is all followed by a Misfits tribute band.

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                            • #15
                              Quoth rerant View Post

                              This is all followed by a Misfits tribute band.
                              MISFITS!
                              Knowledge is power. Power corrupts. Study hard. Be evil.

                              "I never said I wasn't a horrible person."--Me, almost daily

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