Poll: What is the phrase you hear from customers the most?

[Cyanocobalamin]

For me it would be "You changed things around!" referring to our remodeled look.

Everyday I'm tempted to fib "No we didn't. It's been like this ever since I started working here 3 months ago."

As for poll choices, the best pick would be "why are you out of stock?" Or any variation of it. We're out because we're a high volume store, crossdock is slow about sending us stuff we need and only have 4 stockers. {Two openers, one midshifter and one closer. Feel free to take an application since you sound like you want to help us out } Or... because you didn't come in early enough to buy one, thus we are sold out.

[irateguy]

how about wheres the bafroom

[Myra]

"How are WE going to fix this?"

We are a service center for a cellular carrier, and we hear this almost every friggin' day. Generally by folks who have done something horrid to their phone to the point to where we can't do jack to fix it, and we cannot replace it because they did something that voided their warranty, like threw it in a pool or ran it over with a steam roller.

[KaeZoo]

"They should train their people better."

"When will this be on sale?"

[ArenaBoy]

"Why can't I park here?!" When people try to get into VIP.

"I'm suite." Customer thinks he's trying to be funny by making an overused pun

"$10!?!?!? Why do I have to pay that?!?!"

[Lace Neil Singer]

For me, it would be "You look bored." ARRGGGHHHH!!!!!

I voted for "Ill never shop at this store again!" cuz I've heard that so many times, and every time I wished they really meant it... only to be disappointed.

[Discourtesy Clerk]

The one I get all the time that really makes me want to wring the customer's neck, is:

Me: Would you like help out to your car today?
SC: Sure, I bet you'd like a break from being in here all the time, huh?

I'm sorry, loading things into your car for you when you can do it yourself/listening to you yammer on loudly about shit that doesn't matter/taking back your cart because you parked a mile away/leaving my air-conditioned store for the hot parking lot does NOT constitute a break for me.

I also get "No...unless you want to?" Oh yes. I'd love to be your lackey. That sounds great.

[Jester]

For me, it is "free drinks today, right?"

These are generally the people the get the Patented Jester Punishment: straight, warm tequila.

Now sit down, shut up, drink your punishment, and pay for your damn drinks, smart guy!

[friendofjimmyk]

UGH! BLECH! Straight warm tequila...I don't even drink anymore, but that is just awful! God awful!

[Becks]

I chose the "out of this" option, because when I go in to work today (my first day back from vacation), I just KNOW people will be stopping me to ask why there isn't any spinach. (Yeah, they can't read, and their only journeys into the outside world is to go to the grocery store that I work at...)

[Jester]

UGH! BLECH! Straight warm tequila...I don't even drink anymore, but that is just awful! God awful!

Which is precisely WHY that is the Patented Jester Punishment. Yes, I really do do this.

It is astounding how quickly attitudes change once people are forced to either drink a straight shot of tequila or have one in front of them and are being told to drink it.

Damn, the stuff is better than a cattle prod!

[Canadian In Maine]

Without a doubt, the one I hear the most, usually several times a day is:

"Are you open?"

(Yes, I frequently run a cash register)

My reply on occasion: "Why else would I be standing behind this register?"

[staticradio]

well, gosh...darn it to heck...how are ya?

"you look lonely?" (maybe disappointed...not lonely)
"you must be bored." (not really)
"you're crushing my food!" (nope, the automatic conveyor you wanted left in the ON position is doing that...thank you for your patronage...buh, bye )