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Until yesterday, I worked in an electronics store. I've never been much of a ventrioquist, but within two weeks of getting the job I learned how to say "The warranty doesn't cover stupidity." without moving my lips.
Example:
Cust.: I'd like to return this phone. [The cheap one I made you spend 90 minutes selling me yesterday.]
Me: What's wrong?
Cust.: The Caller ID doesn't work.
Me: Did you call the phone company to subscribe to caller ID.
Cust.: No, I thought you were going to set it up.
Me: Caller ID is a service that has to be set up through the phone company. To make the caller ID work you need to call your phone company and tell them you want to subscribe to caller ID.
Cust.: Why didn't you tell me that yesterday when I bought it from you.
Me: I did tell you. I remember hearing myself say, "Now, in order to get caller ID on this phone, you need to subscribe to caller ID through the phone company."
Cust.: But you told me you could set that up for me.
Me: No, you asked me if I could set that up for you and I said, "Unfortunately not, it has to be done through the phone company." Which is a nice way of saying, "No."
Cust.: Well, I still want to return it. You should be clearer about these things when you're selling things.
Me (beginning to ring the return):
-The ooarranty doesn't cother Stootidity (The warranty doesn't cover stupidity.)
Example:
Cust.: I'd like to return this phone. [The cheap one I made you spend 90 minutes selling me yesterday.]
Me: What's wrong?
Cust.: The Caller ID doesn't work.
Me: Did you call the phone company to subscribe to caller ID.
Cust.: No, I thought you were going to set it up.
Me: Caller ID is a service that has to be set up through the phone company. To make the caller ID work you need to call your phone company and tell them you want to subscribe to caller ID.
Cust.: Why didn't you tell me that yesterday when I bought it from you.
Me: I did tell you. I remember hearing myself say, "Now, in order to get caller ID on this phone, you need to subscribe to caller ID through the phone company."
Cust.: But you told me you could set that up for me.
Me: No, you asked me if I could set that up for you and I said, "Unfortunately not, it has to be done through the phone company." Which is a nice way of saying, "No."
Cust.: Well, I still want to return it. You should be clearer about these things when you're selling things.
Me (beginning to ring the return):
-The ooarranty doesn't cother Stootidity (The warranty doesn't cover stupidity.)
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