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Pizza place or phone sex line?

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  • Pizza place or phone sex line?

    Since at the moment, I'm on a week's holiday and am free of SCs for that time, I will share a tale of yore instead. XD This comes from back when I worked at the pizza place. It was a fairly tedious evening, without that many calls, when this little doozy popped up. O.o


    L = me.
    PSC = pervert SC.
    M = Manager, sucky on a lot of occasions but thankfully not on this one.
    Actions are in brackets, italics are my thoughts.


    (phone rings)

    L: (picks up phone before it rings three times, as told to) Hello, this is Pizza Place, my name is Lace, how may I help you?
    PSC: (breathes heavily before speaking) (husky, suggestive sounding male voice) I'd like a pizza.
    L: How the hell does he manage to make asking for pizza sound so sexual?! O_o OK, and what would you like?
    PSC: (makes order in same voice)
    L: OK, that'll be *price here* and thirty minutes.
    PSC: (after paying with credit card) Can I have a ... female driver, please? A sexy one.
    L: What. The. Frick? O.o Your pizza will be thirty minutes. Bye! (hangs up)

    (Manager notices the shellshocked look on my face, walks over)

    M: Anything wrong, Lace?
    L: This customer was talking in a really creepy way, and get this; he asked us to send over a sexy female driver to deliver his pizza.
    M: OK, don't worry; I know just the person.


    The manager then proceeded to call over our biggest, toughest, most tattooed and butchest male driver and give him the order. I would have loved to have seen the PSC's face when he opened the door. XD Funny, we never heard from the perv again.
    People who don't like cats were probably mice in an earlier life.
    My DeviantArt.

  • #2
    Maybe he thought he was ordering from Domin-hos.

    *everyone groans*

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    • #3
      *snerk* There goes rule #1... maybe I'm just in a state of being easily amused, but that made me spit out my Vimto.
      People who don't like cats were probably mice in an earlier life.
      My DeviantArt.

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      • #4
        We've done that.

        Someone would call and would ask for a cute, girl driver (or cute boy driver) and they always end up getting .... the old guy!!

        He was the whole nine yards. Hair growing everywhere ... gut hanging over his belt... And he's funnier than hell too. Loved doing runs like that (he'd always get tipped pretty well too!). And oh, how he LOVED to talk!!
        This area is left blank for a reason.

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        • #5
          I have people do that with my employees sometimes, really harassing them and being downright lewd with them, especially the girls who work the graveyard at front desk (Night Audit, as it's known in the business). There are times when it's amusing to see someone stand and whiff at the plate, but I'm not very amused when I walk by and hear someone tell one of my employees "I just want to take you upstairs to my room and molest you all night." Yes, I have heard this exact line.

          My reaction depends on how pissed I am...9 times out of 10, hearing a line like that means I'm walking you to your room so you can pack and get the hell out. 1 time out of 10, I only heard about it from someone else, in which case you're getting a call from me informing you that any further comments of that nature will get you kicked the hell out.

          You'd be amazed at how many people don't believe me when I say that part, which is why the police and I have made a lot of new "friends"...
          "That's too bad. Hospitals aren't fun to fight through."
          "What IS fun to fight through?"
          "Gardens. Electronics shops. Antique stores, but only if they're classy."

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          • #6
            Quoth Lachrymose View Post
            Maybe he thought he was ordering from Domin-hos.

            *everyone groans*
            But he ended up getting his order from Papa Long John's!
            I don't get paid enough to kiss your a**! -Groezig 5/31/08
            Another day...another million braincells lost...-Sarlon 6/16/08
            Chivalry is not dead. It's just direly underappreciated. -Samaliel 9/15/09

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            • #7
              Quoth tropicsgoddess View Post
              But he ended up getting his order from Papa Long John's!
              http://instantrimshot.com/

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              • #8
                Quoth Lace Neil Singer View Post
                The manager then proceeded to call over our biggest, toughest, most tattooed and butchest male driver and give him the order. I would have loved to have seen the PSC's face when he opened the door. XD Funny, we never heard from the perv again.
                Even better, if he'd agreed to go in drag.

                "Yeah, I'm the sexy driver you requested. You gotta problem with that?!"
                I don't have an attitude problem. You have a perception problem.
                My LiveJournal
                A page we can all agree with!

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                • #9
                  Quoth tropicsgoddess View Post
                  But he ended up getting his order from Papa Long John's!
                  Or maybe Pizza Slut?

                  Okay, now I'm pushing it.

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                  • #10
                    Quoth XCashier View Post
                    Even better, if he'd agreed to go in drag.

                    "Yeah, I'm the sexy driver you requested. You gotta problem with that?!"
                    That would only have been worth doing with pictures. XD
                    People who don't like cats were probably mice in an earlier life.
                    My DeviantArt.

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                    • #11
                      Quoth Lace Neil Singer View Post
                      That would only have been worth doing with pictures. XD
                      Or YouTube.

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