My child was (kind of) an SC!

[Seshat]

A child of that age is not capable of being a sucky customer. They simply don't have the ability to understand the social nuances. At that stage, sucky or not-sucky is the responsibility of the parent.

Similarly, children older than that should know the difference between buying things and theft, but probably don't understand lay-by or other more complicated transactions. Again, the parent/guardian is responsible.

And the intellectually disabled may also be incapable of being sucky customers themselves - but their carer (or whoever lets them out without a carer) can be.


As for whether or not you were sucky: I say no. In a perfect world, you would have noticed the candy before you left the store -- but here in reality, you handled it just fine.

IMO, that's the only possible lapse: and golly gee whiz, does that mean you're human?

Summary: kid too young to be sucky. Parent handled it like a responsible, sensible human. Ergo, no suck.

[tamezin]

but I still can't believe my son did that. Hopefully he'll remember now and I know to keep an especially close eye on him around candy!

I don't know how old your son is, but my older brother did something similar when he was four, (I don't remember the incident, I was too young) my mother did the same thing you did, and he still remembers it to this day.

[Boozy]

It took me a minute to realize this is an old thread. Persephone's statement that this was her first post threw me for a loop!

I think every parent has some kind of story like this. I never "shoplifted" as a toddler, but my sister did. Same story - mom drives back to the store, speaks to manager, 3 year-old sister befuddled at what she did wrong, manager and mom explains the situation, sister learns valuable lesson about taking things without asking.

It doesn't really occur to parents to tell their little ones not to take things until it happens. It's so obvious to us (honest people) that we forget that toddlers don't know these things.

I'm glad the manager was so kind to your son. Cute story.

[Lace Neil Singer]

I remember that once when I worked in the pet centre, there was an incident like this. We had lots of brightly coloured things like cat toys out, as well as open bins of petfood. One day, I was at the till writing out an order sheet, when a woman came up to the till and asked to speak to me. She said that her daughter, who was only small, had stolen a dog biscuit out of the bin. The girl handed it back to me, and obviously prompted by her mother, said she was sorry and that she wouldn't do it again. I told her that it was OK and her mother hugged her.

I always thought that was a perfect example of good parenting; I expect that girl remembered that incident for the rest of her life. After all, as little kids are scared to death of most grownups save their own family, having to apologise to one and hand back something they took is lesson enough, in my opinion, for a small child.

[PCGameGuy]

Welcome to the club!

Well, as I see it, neither I nor his Daddy has ever actually said outright "Do not take things from a store without paying for them"

Just have to say WELCOME! This is your first item on a list you will call 'Things I never thought I'd have to say/tell someone'. As you go forward as a parent you will find the list containing things like 'Do not put beans in your nose' and 'Do not put duct tape on your arms, it will rip the hair off'. All kidding aside, you did good IMNSHO.

[persephone]

Just have to say WELCOME! This is your first item on a list you will call 'Things I never thought I'd have to say/tell someone'. As you go forward as a parent you will find the list containing things like 'Do not put beans in your nose' and 'Do not put duct tape on your arms, it will rip the hair off'. All kidding aside, you did good IMNSHO.

Oh, I know all about that list. I have a six year old Daughter as well as Son (who is now three -- this is an older thread) and I'm shocked by the things I've had to tell both of them that I would never have imagined actually SAYING to someone.

We just moved to a house that pretty much backs up to a canal so I'm trying to think of anything and everything I can tell them that would have to do with not going near the water without a parent. They've been pretty good, so far, but there is also a fence and gate in the way. And putting a latch on the OUTSIDE of that gate that the kiddos can't get to was the first thing Hubby did when he got here!

[LadyAndreca]

I had a parent come in and do that when I worked for the Bullseye--her son had stolen a pack of trading cards because it had a shiny wrapper and she caught him because he wouldn't take his hands out of his pockets to hold her hand in the parking lot. My manager was really good about it, she knelt to the kid's level and gave him a simple but stern lecture about stealing--and took back the opened cards rather than charging for them because the parent was honest.


Me...I don't recall having ever shoplifted, but I sure remember the time my little sister did. A cashier saw her take a pack of gum, but she insisted she hadn't. I believed my sister and said she hadn't, so my parents believed me, so the cashier backed off. I was HORRIFIED when we got home and my sister laughed and offered me some of the gum I'd helped her steal! I was angry at her for hours for tricking me into lying to our parents, and told her I wasn't eating anything stolen. I didn't tell my parents, though--they punished us worse for lying about what we did than for what we did in the first place, so I was too scared to tell them I'd lied.

By the time my youngest brother was old enough to walk, my parents had come up with the mantra of "Is it yours? Is it a toy? Then leave it alone!" I hated hearing it, especially because they wouldn't stop saying it just because hearing the first question would make any of us drop what whatever we were investigating.