"I've been waiting in line for 25 minutes!!1!!!!1!11!1!!!elevnty!! (long and ranty)

[lastofthesummerwine]

If Only!

"So, Sir! In your opinion, which person in that line should have received less than optimum treatment in order that you could have been waited upon sooner? Who looks as if they are unworthy of the best service that can be offered, under the circumsatnces? Point them out, Sphincter Cheese!"

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

I think there's a song about him:

I'm a lumberjack and I'm OK
I sleep all night and I work all day.

I cut down trees, I act a douche
I go to the lavatory.
On Wednesdays I go shopping and wait in line

All together now:
He cuts down trees, he acts a douche
He goes to the lavatory.
On Wednesdays he goes shopping and waits in line

*cracks knuckles*

I'm a lumberjack and I'm OK
I sleep all night and I work all day

He's a lumberjack and he's OK
He sleeps all night and he works all day

I cut down trees, I act a douche
I go to the lavatory
On Wednesdays I go shopping, and then I wait in line

He cuts down trees, he acts a douche
He goes to the lavatory
On Wednesdays he goes shopping, and then he waits in line

He's a lumberjack and he's OK
He sleeps all night and he works all day

I cut down trees, I scream and swear
I like to drive forklifts
I yell at retail workers
Just for giggles and shits

He cuts down trees, he screams and swears
He likes to drive forklifts
He yells at retail workers
Just for giggles and shits...?!

He's a lumberjack and he's OK
He sleeps all night and he works all day

I cut down trees, I rant and rave
I make the cashier sob
I'm proud I am an asshole
Just like my dear papa

He cuts down trees, he rants and raves
He makes the cashier sob
He's proud he is an asshole
Just like his *rabble rabble ah forget it blah blah blah.....*

And I thought you were so congenial!

Thanks go to Cinema Guy for obvious inspiration

[SG15Z]

Alright but since my story seems to be the original inspiration I better get my 10%!

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

Alright but since my story seems to be the original inspiration I better get my 10%!

Ah sure, why not?

[Gabrielle Proctor]

CG and Irv make a great team!

[Crow The Robot]

Guess he wasn't hauling any clue by fours.

[otakuneko]

re: lining up at empty registers
My favorite theater has a way to prevent that. There are two boxes, each seating two cashiers. There are two queues, one for each box. When you get to the front, you wait til you get called over. In all the many times I've been there (not so much lately, crap movies and all) I never saw anyone wander up to an empty register.

Kinda like the one line for multiple cashier system, but doubled! Or split in twain, however you want to look at it.