Regional Rudeness

[dougiezerts]

I've heard it said that there are regions of the country where people are ruder than other areas, and I tend to agree with that.
Certainly, New Yorkers are famous for their rudeness. Same with Philadelphians. And my co-workers feel that New Jersians are pretty rude, and I tend to agree.
(No offence to any of you who live in these areas!)

[LibraryLady]

I'm a native New Yorker and we tend to be direct. People from other areas of the country tend to see this as rudeness although it's rarely meant as such.

Also, I've noted something in the Midwest that sounds polite but comes across to me as rude. In New York City, 'excuse me' usually means 'May I get through?' In the Midwest 'excuse me' is often said with tone that means 'Out of my way, now!'.

[Drakstern]

I don't think it's really a regional thing, since- having taken calls from all over the country- every place has assholes.

That said, if I was forced to say which region is the nicest and which is the rudest... Southerners are generally more polite(but when they're rude, they are RUDE), and Californians are generally the least polite(and the most I WANT IT NOW, but we won't go into that).

I should also note that I rarely have trouble with people from the northeast. I take a LOT of calls from Massachusetts and New York, and they're generally pretty polite and willing to work with me.

[tamezin]

I'm a native New Yorker and we tend to be direct. People from other areas of the country tend to see this as rudeness although it's rarely meant as such.

Also, I've noted something in the Midwest that sounds polite but comes across to me as rude. In New York City, 'excuse me' usually means 'May I get through?' In the Midwest 'excuse me' is often said with tone that means 'Out of my way, now!'.

I live in the midwest and have seen this phenomena and tend to agree. I will apologize now to all the folks from St. Louis, but I have been to the east coast, I have been to the west coast, I have been to the soutwest and the northwest and I have never ever experienced ruder people (customers as well as customer service reps/sales etc) than the foks in St. Louis.

[JoitheArtist]

While every place has jerks, I've definately noticed some tendencies.

1. New Jersey. Bar none, the worst. Sorry folks, you got the highest percentage of assholes. Sheesh.

2. NYC. A very close second. I mean, yikes!

3. Miami snowbirds. What happened, did all the rudest New Yorkers just randomly move to Florida for 6 months out of the year?

When I worked in member services, I loved getting calls from the Deep South: even when the ladies were frustrated, they were generally polite, and usually just fun to talk to.

(I should also note that I met some very fine people from NJ, NYC, and Miami. But the percentage of jerks there did seem to be much higher.)

[Catwoman2965]

hehehe - as a native New Jerseyian, I can agree with the rudeness....and am not offended. My cousin was up for Christmas, and we went shopping on black friday. She commented on teh number of rude people in NJ! Of course, I'm not including myself!

My mom lives in VA, and while there are some rude people down there, my experience has been that things are more relaxes the further south you go, and therefore people will be more likely to go out of their way to help you.

That being said, a little politeness goes a long way. I always say please and thank people for their help, even if i'm in the mall, going in and out of stores, and not buying. I will say goodbye and so on while walking out. I also work in retail, so that helps as well...we have some doozies in my store, and I don't want to be known as someone like that!

[KiaKat]

I second the 'New Yorkers aren't rude, they're direct' statement.

I offer as an example, a young woman who moved to Manhattan from the deep south. After living there for a year, she said to me one day that 'New Yorkers aren't rude. They're just frustrated with the tourists who take up the whole sidewalk gawking at the landmarks, when the natives have to get somewhere.'

NYC moves at a very specific pace, with a bit of leeway for those who might be a bit confused by the subway system, the one-way streets, or the B&T crowd. Those who bring that pace to a grinding halt are simply asked (curtly, but politely) to get on with it, so the native can continue moving about the day.

Bostonians are similar, but the politeness is colder, and because the city is *much* smaller and the T less complicated, it's not as fast a pace or as confusing for tourists.

I've generally found, however, that suburban NY'ers, those from CT (I swear, y'all don't know if you're NE or NY - just pick one and stick with it!), and those from NJ/Philadelphia are more likely to give me a migraine than the rest of the east coast. I can't remark as to those from the midwest, mountains, or west coast, as I don't have a large enough sample to work from.

[Kiwi]

I agree, NY'ers are frank and direct not rude

[LibraryLady]

One more thing I forgot to add about New Yorkers. There are certain accents that make almost anything sound confrontational. As a current movie says, "They ain't fightin' they're conversatin'." Think Rudy Giuliani.

[auntiem]

Bostonians are similar, but the politeness is colder, and because the city is *much* smaller and the T less complicated, it's not as fast a pace or as confusing for tourists.

Sorry, as a tourist to both cities - NY is easy peasy to figure out, Boston on the other hand I think you should get a medal if you manage to successfully return your rental car - that city makes me tear my hair out.

I'm in the PacificNW so we get the hodge podge (this is all a broad generalization):
1) Hispanics - if you are polite to them they are the best clients because they are polite and loyal clients. I don't have a single EW client in this category. The first encounter there is a little barter banter - but that is just to work your paces and once they trust you they stop doing it.
2) Relocated Californians - the ones that have been here long enough are polite only because they know we loathe them so they sheepishly go about their buisness. The recently relocated try to act arrogant and don't get away with it for long since, well, we loathe them. The EWs in this category learn pretty quick that they are interlopers and shouldn't stir the waters if they want to stay and play here.
3) Locals - usual mixed bag of polite, EW and a specific PacificNW brand of passive agressive assholes - those that are jerks, but couch it in polite behavior. They are just this side of being called out for their behavior without crossing the line. These are the worst.
4) Relocated East Coasters - They don't have time to be EWs because the culture is so different that they spend their first year with a reaction similar to the deer in headlights look. They can't figure us out at all. Since most of my family is from the East Coast I "get" them so they feel like I'm an ally and none of them are EWs to me. Also, they don't get the same "hate" that Californians do so they often announce themselves so I know how to interact with them on their level.
5) "Old Families" - the last names say it all. They will announce their name at the beginning of the interaction. Their families have been here forever and own nearly everything (or at least they used to). Depending on where you work / what you do these folk can be hell, but since I currently don't have one as a landlord for my domicile or workplace I could give a rats so I don't have so don't kiss anything for them. They hate this and it makes them sputter in a very entertaining way.

[BaristaTrav]

Jersey, NY, and Philly can't hold a candle to South FL. It's not even close.

[earl colby pottinger]

We need to spread this out.

We need to spread this out to cover more of the world.

I have observed as an English-born, Jamaican parented, Canadian Citizen cruising around the Caribbean that:

Jamaicans: If speaking in a hurry and in cut-throat English a "Good morning, how are you feeling today!" can sound like they are cursing you out.

English: So called lower class have accents so thick that you can barely understand them even when they spell out the words. The upper classes need to hold their heads up in that position just to pronunciate the way they do, so they look like they are looking down on you even when they are not.

Canadians: We are not always polite, the 'please' is just a speech pattern. Relayed to me as a true event. A girl went up to a knife display and asked, "Please, sell me the biggest knife you got, I need to gut that other girl because she is talking to my boy-friend.". Please does not make that a polite and nice sentence.

[KiaKat]

Sorry, as a tourist to both cities - NY is easy peasy to figure out, Boston on the other hand I think you should get a medal if you manage to successfully return your rental car - that city makes me tear my hair out.

Ah, sorry. I guess I should have specified for non-drivers. I'm thinking back to Uni, most of us didn't have cars. Plus I spent too much time driving through there as a teenager/young adult (during the height of the Big Dig, natch) to be confused by the Bostonian area streets.

5) "Old Families" - the last names say it all. They will announce their name at the beginning of the interaction. Their families have been here forever and own nearly everything (or at least they used to). Depending on where you work / what you do these folk can be hell, but since I currently don't have one as a landlord for my domicile or workplace I could give a rats so I don't have so don't kiss anything for them. They hate this and it makes them sputter in a very entertaining way.

Not every old family is like this. Some of us are very quiet about our influence, and only use it when we *really* need to. Intimidating a CSR is usually the mark of the Nouveau Riche, at least in my experience. The Old Families generally are buddy-buddy with the company's CEO, and don't need to intimidate the little people.

[auntiem]

Ah, I should have clarified. I meant more the in-town "rich" families. The kind that act like the Rothchilds* and everyone else is beneath them and must do what they say. Which is kinda laughable in the PacificNW since in order to have been here since "the begining" you were probably a gold miner, rail worker, logger, fisherman, shop keep or 'ho (manual labor or CSR, all professions they look down on now).
The farmer / rancher families are totally cool and very rarely exert influence unless they really need to (usually to protect their land).

eta *West Coast "old families" don't get that they aren't like the East Coast type of "Old Families" and really don't have that kind of pull or frankly, class.

[powerboy]

As a Native Californian, I have to disagree. For the most part, we are polite or atleast where I live. But we do have assholes.