Strange Diseases and other stories

[Kali]

Hahahaha, I was hoping to get a Sydneyite to bite that one :P

I used to live in Manly, the height of pretentiousness.

Besides, they are only soulless and impolite when they are being tourists

[Imogene]

Me: Hi, how are you?
SC: Flea treatment.

I actually acted on that one day, at The Chesterfield!
M: "How are you today?" *to random customer walking into the store*
RC: "I know what I'm looking for."
M: *thinking* "I've had enough of this/I didn't hear what he said..." *cross store to get behind him* "I'm sorry, what'd you say?"
RC: *repeats*
M: "Really, that's interesting, because I asked how you were doing."
RC: "Oh... um..."

I got another who responded to my How are you with Hi, to which I said "You know that's illegal in The Chesterfield, yes?"

[Megg]

To give the other side of it -- I hate it when people I don't know (or don't know well) ask me "how are you?" in passing.

I am required by my job to say "Hi, how are you?" when I answer the drive thru. I have no choice.

I get a lot of people who just don't answer and start ordering,I also get a lot who don't say anything at all. Either way, I don't care. What I really hate is the ones who say "Good, you?" or something then don't wait for an answer. Just don't ask, then!

[RetailWorkhorse]

To give the other side of it -- I hate it when people I don't know (or don't know well) ask me "how are you?" in passing. What am I supposed to say? "I suck. My back hurts, my cat is sick, I'm hot and tired and I just want to go home, and I'll have these and I'm paying by debit, thanks." So I usually just grit my teeth and say "fine" even if I'm not, or just say "hi", or just nod, or just ignore it and go on with my day / the transaction.

Go ahead and answer the question. The one's that are actually interested will probably sympathize or have a way to make ya feel better.

They don't want a real answer.

Yes I do.

But then, I'm a "rare person, Dubya-Bob!"

Why do I still care about people?

[Gravekeeper]

And you are slowly starting to sound like GK. Um, GK....did you once father a child that we didn't know about?

Not unless I can't remember an illicit liaison from when I was 6.

Cripes, how old do you think I am? ;p

The laser pointer is the most effective tool in my arsenal for distracting the beast. Drives her insane.

[Sliceanddice]

Not unless I can't remember an illicit liaison from when I was 6.

Cripes, how old do you think I am? ;p

36
very very old

[Gravekeeper]

36
very very old

><

I'm 28. <sob>

[Peppergirl]

On non-emergency calls, which are our corporate travelers, it goes something like this:

Me - "Thanks for holding, this is Peppergirl"

Cust - "This is Bob Smith from Smith company"

Me - "Hi Bob, how are you?"

Cust - "Fine thanks. I need....." Or "Fine, how are you?"


It always tickles me when it goes like this:

Me - "Thanks for holding, this is Peppergirl"

Cust - "This is Bob Smith from Smith company"

Me - "Hi Bob, how are you?"

Cust - "I need to fly to Detroit from Louisville on ......"


It doesn't really piss me off so much as amuse me. Mainly because they either a) don't listen, or b) they're WAY too important to exchange pleasantries with a peon like you, or c) their mama's didn't teach them basic manners.

[Gravekeeper]

I do the reverse to callers a fair amount of time. Its like they're having a different conversation than I am. They'll ask "How are you?" or some variant, than I'll finish some part of my script, ask them something ( on a high priority line, no chitter ) or just not be able to respond in time than they go "That's good" and keep on talking.

I tried an experiment a few times with it. I just went silent after they asked "How are you?". Inevitable a few seconds later they'll go "That's good" or even "I'm doing pretty good too" as if I had asked them in response.

Lending further weight to my theory that none of these people listen to a damn thing I say for the initial 10 seconds of a call. Seriously. Not a word of it. 50% of the time if you had listened to the first thing I said you'd have already answered your first question. For example if I say "Medical Emergency Line" and you say "Yeah, can I get a cab?" than you aren't listening. Because you're a idiot.

[Pagan]

36
very very old

So does that mean me and some others on here are positively ancient then, since we're over 36?

[Lace Neil Singer]

Thanks; due to the assumption that 36 is old, now I feel, at 29, as tho I have the power of YOUTH! (Cookies for those who get the reference)

Re: Strange diseases; don't forget the dreaded Cigaretteitis! O_o

Me: Hi, how are you?
Customer: Twenty Superkings black!

Me: Hi, how are you?
Customer: Ounce of Golden Virginia!

And so on. And yeah, I am required to greet you and ask how you are. In reality, I couldn't care less. ^^ So just answer "fine" so we can get on to you paying for your petrol/chocolate/smokes/etc which is why you're here in the first place, after all. XD

[NightWatch]

I get a lot of this:

Me: <opening spiel>
caller:hihowareyouineedanofficeratmyhouse

No room to answer the question.

When people call me and ask "how are you" and actually wait for a response, my automatic reply is "i'm good, how are you?" and it's a terrible thing to ask where I work. Because seriously; who calls the police when they're having a good day? I really need to get into the habit of saying "I'm good, thank you" instead.

[Seshat]

Lending further weight to my theory that none of these people listen to a damn thing I say for the initial 10 seconds of a call. Seriously. Not a word of it. 50% of the time if you had listened to the first thing I said you'd have already answered your first question. For example if I say "Medical Emergency Line" and you say "Yeah, can I get a cab?" than you aren't listening. Because you're a idiot.

Or because you have a minor hearing disorder and it takes you some time to adjust to the speaker's accent.

Or because you were waiting on hold, and weren't concentrating on the hold music (who does?), and it takes you a few seconds to adjust to 'hey, the human is on the line now'.

Honestly, the first ten seconds or so of a call might as well be the other person saying the alphabet to me. Even with people I know well, I have to somehow adjust before I can actually understand them.

[BookstoreEscapee]

Being in a seperate room and in the middle of catching goldfish, I have no way of knowing what "these" are.

You mean you don't have X-ray vision eyes in the back of your head?

Come on - nothing says "Classy" like AARDVARK! You're just an Aardvark hater - or worse yet, you DISCRIMINATE against aardvarks.

How could anyone discriminate against this?

[garth1]

To give the other side of it -- I hate it when people I don't know (or don't know well) ask me "how are you?" in passing. What am I supposed to say? "I suck. My back hurts, my cat is sick, I'm hot and tired and I just want to go home, and I'll have these and I'm paying by debit, thanks." So I usually just grit my teeth and say "fine" even if I'm not, or just say "hi", or just nod, or just ignore it and go on with my day / the transaction.

I have another tactic to that. When they ask "how are you"? I ask "do you really mean that, or is that just a polite social greeting"?
If it's the polite one, I say fine thankyou, if they really mean it, I give them the "I have hemorrhoids, my toe nail has fungus, and I have 5 cats that I'm allergic to.