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  • #1

    Tax Season, Duck Season, Wabbit Season

    Well it is Tax season, and the morons seem to come out in droves.....

    Today's gem.
    I work at a patriotic named tax prep place in a small town,

    (background) Since hubby is active duty navy and I can explain a LES (leave and earning statement) without thinking, My boss has actually titled me with the official military expert (i take care of our location and get calls from our other one.)

    This guy comes in saying he was discharged from the Marines and has disability, unemployment etc. and has to pay back his enlistment bonus. The receptionist immediately defers to me.

    SC: *refuses to hand me W2s etc* How much can I get back
    Me: Well i can input it into the computer and get that amount for you
    SC: No this is sensitive information and classified, i want my refund
    Me: Sir, in my other job, i have government clearance and there is a confidentiality clause here at this job. I will not discuss your info with anyone but you, and the IRS.
    SC: No I made roughly $XXX.99 How much will i get back. And what branch do you deal with?
    Me: Sir, I can not tell you until I see the details, ie how much was held federally etc. And my husband is Navy.
    SC: NO. DAMNIT YOU WILL TELL ME
    Me: .....*pauses to remain polite* Sir. If you do not give me information, I can not complete this 'mission'
    SC: Ok.
    Me: are you married?
    SC: Why are you hitting on me?
    Me: *facepalm* No. I need to know for your filing status
    SC: Yes married.
    Me: OK Are you living together or separated and are you filing jointly
    SC: Yes I live with the b*tch. Why the hell do you care?
    Me: Sir I am trying to gather the information to prepare your return properly
    SC: Well you can f*ck off.
    Me; EXCUSE ME?
    SC: You heard me you can suck my (insert male part here) while you are at it!
    ME: Ok Sir you need to leave...NOW
    SC: Yeah I will leave after you suck me like a good sailor would that is all they are good for and you are probably just a f*g hag.
    Me: That is it! Get the hell out of my office and never come back. *Takes all the self control she has to not throw the papers at him*
    SC: Oh I see how it is, don't wanna suck it huh? Probably not any good at it.
    Me: GET OUT OR I AM CALLING THE POLICE
    SC: *starts to walk out still ranting and raving not nice comments about sailors
    Me: *turns to co worker* Well, I can see he was discharged for mental reasons
    SC: How did you know? *Leaves out the door*
    Last edited by AmethystSquirrel; 02-03-2009, 04:49 AM. Reason: Cleaning up the wording
    You've got a real problem all right, and a banjo is the only answer! - Pinkie Pie
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  • #2
    wow. Reasons why I am a good citizen. Dang. Idiot. Yes, clearly mentally unstable. Good luck with any place getting his taxes filed EVER.
    When it comes to getting things done, we need fewer architects and more bricklayers. ---Colleen C. Barrett---

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    • #3
      turbo tax would probably reject him!
      You've got a real problem all right, and a banjo is the only answer! - Pinkie Pie

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      • #4
        He'd probably think he could get "satisfaction" what with it being named "Turbo" and all!

        Eejit.
        It's floating wicker propelled by fire!

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        • #5
          You know, good-natured ribbing among the branches is one thing. I do that alot with my ex-Marine friends and my ex-Swabby supervisor
          I have a...thing. Wanna see it?

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          • #6
            How did you know?
            it's pretty freakin obvious... Actually though... I was suspecting an OTH or Big Chicken Dinner myself.

            Which I suspect is why he didn't bring the DD form in cos that shows your discharge status.


            But hey I guess he doesn't want his money that badly!

            Comment

            • #7
              Quoth Nurian View Post
              You know, good-natured ribbing among the branches is one thing. I do that alot with my ex-Marine friends and my ex-Swabby supervisor
              The good natured is fun. I have a marine an d an Army buddy and we always toss jokes at each other but we know we respect all the branches.
              You've got a real problem all right, and a banjo is the only answer! - Pinkie Pie

              Comment

              • #8
                I live in a town that has both a Navy presence and a Coast Guard presence. Naturally the members of each of the two will spare no opportunity to mock the other one, sometimes viciously.

                And yet, I have no doubt, having seen it, that if a Navy guy saw a Coastie getting any kind of disrespectful shit like this, they would be the first to jump to the Coastie's defense. And vice versa. Because when shit like this happens, the inter-branch rivalries go right out the window, as they suddenly all become members of The Military.

                I have never been in the military. But you do NOT disrespect its members* or the uniform. That is just asking for trouble.

                *Unless, of course, one of the members is being a grade A jackhole. Then you can disrespect them as a PERSON, but NOT as a member of the military, if that makes sense.

                "The Customer Is Always Right...But The Bartender Decides Who Is                 Still A Customer."

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                • #9
                  Quoth Jester View Post

                  *Unless, of course, one of the members is being a grade A jackhole. Then you can disrespect them as a PERSON, but NOT as a member of the military, if that makes sense.
                  Perfect sense. I can make fun of a lot of people, even if I have respect for [insert group they belong to here]. Drives my mother batty.
                  Any day you're looking down at the dirt instead of up at the dirt is a good day.

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                  • #10
                    Reminds me...

                    I was in my blues near Camp Pendleton a few weeks back. I went to a bar, took off my coat and ordered a beer. As the barkeep came back I asked, "Wanna hear a Marine joke?"

                    These four Marines in the back come up to me, circling up.

                    "We played football in the Academy," says the ringleader, "So you really wanna tell that joke?"

                    I look 'em up and down before answering, "What? And have to explain it four times?!"

                    j/k

                    Semper fi

                    Comment

                    • #11
                      Ms. Squirrel,
                      Welcome to the tax industry.

                      I have some SC's who ask what they can get back over the phone. I can't recall any that refused to show their tax docs.

                      I've never been hit on (threated at least once a year, but never to my face); however, every year I get a marriage proposal from some a lady who got back more than expected. The best story there was when my wife stopped by.
                      A grateful client screamed "Marry me."
                      I replied, "No can do. My wife is insanely jealous, she knows karate and I standing behind you....Spare her dear, she's a paying customer."
                      I'm trying to see things from your point of view, but I can't get my head that far up my keister!

                      Who is John Galt?
                      -Ayn Rand, Atlas Shrugged

                      Comment

                      • #12
                        Quoth AmethystSquirrel View Post
                        This guy comes in saying he was discharged from the Marines and has disability, unemployment etc. and has to pay back his enlistment bonus. The receptionist immediately defers to me.

                        SC: *refuses to hand me W2s etc* How much can I get back
                        Me: Well i can input it into the computer and get that amount for you
                        SC: No this is sensitive information and classified, i want my refund
                        Quoth PepperElf View Post

                        Which I suspect is why he didn't bring the DD form in cos that shows your discharge status.


                        But hey I guess he doesn't want his money that badly!
                        Since I know next to nothing about these sort of items: Would a Bad Conduct Discharge or Other-Then-Honorable Discharge have any affect on his taxes, other then having to return his enlistment bonus?

                        (Also, if he got a BCD or OTH, would he still be eligible for disability benefits?)
                        Be a winner today: Pick a fight with a 4 year old.

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                        • #13
                          Quoth Alpha Strike View Post
                          Since I know next to nothing about these sort of items: Would a Bad Conduct Discharge or Other-Then-Honorable Discharge have any affect on his taxes, other then having to return his enlistment bonus?

                          (Also, if he got a BCD or OTH, would he still be eligible for disability benefits?)
                          Taxes, no. Benefits... ooo that's a good point... with an OTH or BCD you do lose out on some or most benefits, though I'm not sure about disability.

                          ooo. No, I don't think so... I found the chart here: Eligibility Benefits (HTML). It lists "NE" (not eligible) for everything except the Board for Correction of Naval Records. So yeah if he was BCD (or DD) he'd be pretty much screwed.

                          but with that attitude he's sporting... yeah, either a bcd, dd, or a psych discharge.
                          Last edited by PepperElf; 02-03-2009, 08:50 PM.

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                          • #14
                            Quoth Alpha Strike View Post
                            Since I know next to nothing about these sort of items: Would a Bad Conduct Discharge or Other-Then-Honorable Discharge have any affect on his taxes, other then having to return his enlistment bonus?

                            (Also, if he got a BCD or OTH, would he still be eligible for disability benefits?)

                            Repaying back enlistment (or reenlistment bonus) should not affect his taxes as long as he is up to date on the repayment. If anyone is not up to date on taxes, child support, student loans or government loans; you wont see a penny back!
                            You've got a real problem all right, and a banjo is the only answer! - Pinkie Pie

                            Comment

                            • #15
                              Quoth Jester View Post
                              I have never been in the military. But you do NOT disrespect its members* or the uniform. That is just asking for trouble.

                              *Unless, of course, one of the members is being a grade A jackhole. Then you can disrespect them as a PERSON, but NOT as a member of the military, if that makes sense.
                              Two of my best friends when I was growing up ended up joining the Marines. And my grandfather was a POW in WWII (European theater). I agree, you don't disrespect the military or its people.

                              Interesting choice of words, though "members," when we're talking about the dick the OP had to deal with.
                              PWNADE(TM) - Serve up a glass today! | PWNZER - An act of pwnage so awesome, it's like the victim got hit by a tank.

                              There are only Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse because I choose to walk!

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