It Had Been Too Long Without A SC

[cj1991]

Even the holiday season went exceptionally well. I should have known it was coming.

Today started sucktastic. Our supervisor is off on medical leave, and our fill-in did payroll, and assumed that people would figure out that because of the bank holiday on Monday, that payroll would be delayed one day. It's always that way. But she shouldn't have assumed. Long story short, there are a ton of people there who live paycheck to paycheck, and one day makes a difference. The fill-in felt really bad, and most everyone was cool with it, but the queen of whiners (a direct co-worker) was stomping around all day as her checks bounced right and left, grumbling about making "certain people" (the fill-in or the company - take your pick) pay all the overdraft fees. There was also an employee's spouse who called over and over and over to complain about it, making the fill-in feel progressively worse (like all that bitching will make the money show up sooner). I live paycheck to paycheck, but I NEVER pay out my account before that deposit shows up in my account, because things happen. I pay what I absolutely have to, and I work with others that I owe because if you're not making a habit of it, most people will work with you in that regard.

Anyway, as I saw the end of the day creeping closer, I answered the phone because the first to the phone was busy reading the newspaper. Had she not screwed off, i wouldn't have had to deal with this one.

**Reminder: I work in a niche business that if I mentioned too much would give it away. Our boss is very picky about us grumbling about customers to people, so this is deliberately vague**

Me - Me
SC - Sucky Customer

Me - How can I help you?
SC - I need an item identical to the one I have now.
Me - Ok, which one do you have?
SC - It has your phone number on it. (all our products do)
Me - Can you give me a little more information?
SC - It's (insert extremely poor description)
Me - Um, that really doesn't help me much. Can you give me a little more info?
SC - I'm looking right at it. (I'm about ready to kill)
Me - Ok, can you give me some general information?
SC - It's (insert size)
Me - Well, that narrows it down a bit, but.....
SC - HELLO!!! HELLO!!! ARE YOU THERE????? HELLO!!
Me - Yes, I'm here. As I said, that helps some, but we sell 5 different product lines in that size.
SC - Then what's the problem?
Me - I can't narrow the item down just by the size (or color - I get that one a lot).
long pause......
SC - HELLO!!! HELLO!!! ARE YOU THERE????? HELLO!!
Me - I'm here. I'm waiting for you to reply.
SC - What do I have to do to figure this out?
Me - When did you buy it? I can backtrack the order.....
SC - I didn't.
Me - Did you buy it from locally from a partner of ours?
SC - No. I got it from.....someone.
Me - Ok. Well, it's hard for me to match something exactly if you don't know what it is.
SC - Well I have it here and.....HELLO!!! HELLO!!! ARE YOU THERE????? HELLO!!
Me - Yes. I'm listening to you. Go ahead.
SC - I don't understand why you can't help me. (at this point, I'm going to ditch the call to someone else because I'm out of ideas)
Me - Let me see if I can find someone more knowledgeable. Hold please.(everyone else is on the phone - CRAP)
Me - Ok. Everyone else is on the phone. The only other option I can offer you is to have you measure (a certain part) and tell me what it is.
SC - If I have to.......(I start to hear grunting and straining)....HELLO!!! HELLO!!! ARE YOU THERE????? HELLO!!
Me - I'm just waiting for your measurement.
SC - Well, depending on where I measure it, I get big differences. (if this is true, they've got issues and shouldn't be using the item)
Me - Well, what's the general size?
SC - It's (insert measurement that's smaller than anything I have)
Me - The closest thing I have is (insert product).
SC - That's it!
Me - You're sure? I just get concerned when I'm asked to match an item and I'm not sure that's what it is.
SC - I said that was it. It's not the other measurements you said. I'm sure. (but a minute ago, they couldn't get a straight measurement)
Me - Ok, well using the original size you gave me at the beginning, it would cost...
SC - It has (insert number of pieces, making it impossible to be the size they gave me at the beginning of the call)
Me - Oh. Well that's a different story. It's not (original size). It's (bigger size).
SC - How do you know that? You told me that it was too hard to tell over the phone.
Me - Because the piece sizes are specific, and that's an easy way for us to tell.
SC - Oh. Well excuuuuuuuse me. (they're getting cocky)
Me - Ok. This is making it easier. Let me ask you, how is (a certain piece) laid out?
SC - It's (exactly what I wanted to hear).
Me - Ok. That's good. But you do realize that the one you have isn't compatible (to do a certain configuration that I thought they might be trying to do - I'm obligated to tell them that).
SC - I'm aware of that.
Me - Ok. What color is the one you have?
SC - It's red. (they're really annoyed now, but this is all crucial info and they're ill prepared)
Me - Perfect. That's a special item we make, and it costs (insert cost), delivered.
SC - So what's the shipping?
Me - It's a delivered price. Shipping included.
SC - So that includes shipping? (duh!)
Me - Yes.
long pause.....
Me - So do you want to place an order?
SC - I don't know.
Me - Ok.
SC - You don't know much, do you? And your service sucks!
Me - I'm sorry?
SC - How much would 2 cost?
Me - It's (insert amount)
SC - Yep. Well that's how much I was prepared to give you, but you're not very knowledgeable, and your service and attitude sucks, so I don't think I will, and I hold influence over the purchasing of others, and I'm going to tell them your service sucks too.
Me - Well, I'm sorry that you feel that way, but you have to understand that these items are highly custom, and you're asking me to match something, but you have a lot of pieces of the puzzle missing, and it's hard for me to give you that information without that info. But we've figured it out now, and I'm fairly confident that this is what you're looking for, so would you like to place an order?
SC - No. I'm going to call around and see if I can find someone else who knows what they are talking about and has better service. (I can see this going nowhere fast)
Me - Ok then. That's fine. Thanks for calling. Have a nice day. (and I hung up quick).

I shook for half an hour after that one. The girl on the other side of my wall heard me struggle with them and asked if I was ok. I then documented the call immediately with the fill-in, should they call back.

The fill-in told me not to worry about it - she had 2 last week. One was very similar to my call, and the other was inquiring about a process we do that is complicated and involves asking a ton of questions. The person got annoyed about halfway through, told her that she asks too many questions, and they're taking their business elsewhere.

She said that some people you are just better off not having as customers. My co-worker who heard me struggle said "I'd guarantee you that we'd fill the order, and it wouldn't match what they had".

And I'm sure she's right.

But I didn't need that today.

[jerkface11]

Ok I'm very confused. What do you sell? It sounds complicated. As for the paychecks I had to deal with people whining about them all day long.

[bainsidhe]

Ha. I understand completely how you feel. I work in manufacturing and we'll have customers that call and say "I have something from *my company* and I want another". You go through a whole list of questions to first find out what kind of item they have and then try to wrestle out a description. Thing is, we make things custom. If you just guess at something, we can make it but then you'll be stuck with it. We make tens of thousands of configurations. Telling me your "widget" is "standard" sized won't cut it. Not when we make things from 2" up to six feet. Yeah, a bit of a difference there.

[CiggyStoreClerk]

Good lord, I hate the "Are you there?!"

Had a woman last night who was very long-winded. She would go on and on for several minutes about something simple like, "I can't see my picture". So when I was ready to start talking, I'd wait a second to see if she had anything else to say. Just as I'd start talking, she'd go off with the "Hello?! Are you there?!" and then start talking again instead of letting me explain >_<

[PepperElf]

SC - No. I got it from.....someone.

i'm wondering ... if she got it from "someone"... did she get it legally?

cos hey if she stole it, no wonder she doesn't want to pay that much for more of them... and doesn't care if it's not the exact config she could use.


and oy... yes i do understand living paycheck to paycheck. which is why i never floated checks. i know it comes in handy, but ... then you get one day where the money isn't there right away and *bam* you rack up a bunch of over-draft and bounced-check fees!

[Bramblerose]

So you are in a niche market and they think they will take their business elsewhere?

Sometiems I wonder how these people made it to adulthood thinking that everyone can read tehir mind and that manners = showing throat all the time. Then I read other posts about Pwecious Snowflakes.

[Imogene]

SC - Well, depending on where I measure it, I get big differences.

*sigh* Everyone does... and why do you worry about the size? If you can please your SO...

There ARE standard measurements for you, but hardly anyone seems to know them...

Also, I hate how cell phones have started the "Hello? Are you there?" trend when we don't respond immediately. I don't talk excessively on phones, partially because they freak me out, and in part because I'm still thinking about what you just asked me, listening to it turn over and over in the rock tumbler in my head. The info you give me is dross, and I'm destroying the bad parts to find the pretty, smooth stone of idea, or perhaps a geode. So I know how to help you. It takes time, time that ties up my mouth (Yeah, I don't know why, either?)

[Skeksin]

"Ok your having difficulty giving me necessary details to help match your product. Does your Cell have a camera? If so and if your cell also has email then you can take a picture of your product and email that picture to us at company@email.com. Talk to your cell provider for exact steps for using it's phone and email. Have a wonderful day."

[cj1991]

Ok I'm very confused. What do you sell? It sounds complicated. As for the paychecks I had to deal with people whining about them all day long.

Sorry about that. I have to keep it vague. Our big boss is specific that he doesn't like us badmouthing our customers because we pride ourselves on our service, but I need a place to vent from time to time or I'll go nuts. If I mentioned it or our product line, anyone could narrow it down to one of a handfull of businesses (less than 5 per division) who make these products.

I can say I sell durable consumer goods that serve just a few different types of applications, which are related in a general sense (like pet food - it can be for dogs, cats, etc but it's pet food in the general sense). It definitely is a niche business, meaning that we don't have to compete too terribly much with other companies to get business. Many of our customers actually seek us out. We have a great reputation in the industry.

We make a core of products in both of our divisions, but the options for customization are pretty much limitless, and that's where it gets complex. The customers oftentimes don't understand that. While most people understand after you explain just why it's so important to get details right (some of our stuff can cost mega bucks, while others cost hardly any), they tend to back off, but some just expect you to have all the magic answers, and then get jerky when you struggle.

I always feel bad when I need to gripe but I can't get down to the meat of it. But I appreciate the chance to grumble nonetheless.

[cj1991]

Ha. I understand completely how you feel. I work in manufacturing and we'll have customers that call and say "I have something from *my company* and I want another". You go through a whole list of questions to first find out what kind of item they have and then try to wrestle out a description. Thing is, we make things custom. If you just guess at something, we can make it but then you'll be stuck with it. We make tens of thousands of configurations. Telling me your "widget" is "standard" sized won't cut it. Not when we make things from 2" up to six feet. Yeah, a bit of a difference there.

Oh yes. I hate when people tell me "standard". That doesn't cut it for about 90% of what we sell.

In fact, I sent a request for more information from a customer who gave me virtually no usable info, and I actually put "please do not answer "standard" because this does not fit within any standard that we have".

[cj1991]

i'm wondering ... if she got it from "someone"... did she get it legally?

cos hey if she stole it, no wonder she doesn't want to pay that much for more of them... and doesn't care if it's not the exact config she could use.


and oy... yes i do understand living paycheck to paycheck. which is why i never floated checks. i know it comes in handy, but ... then you get one day where the money isn't there right away and *bam* you rack up a bunch of over-draft and bounced-check fees!

I was pooped when I wrote this last night, and I noticed that I fogot to mention that I asked if they could tell me who they got it from so I could backtrack it that way, they said "NO". When I started to go to the next question, they said they didn't know originally bought it. Don't know if I believe that or not.

My husband said he thought that maybe they were trying to sell it and were looking for a price and wasn't sure what they had, or perhaps it wasn't our product and they'd called a few places and were brushed off.

We did get a request once for a product with half of the normal components we would normally put on this product. That sent up all kinds of flags. Turned out they had 1/2 of the product (it comes in two components), and we were able to track it to an order that we had filed a shipping claim on because half of it was missing. The person hung up before we could find out who they were. It could have been as innocent as the shipper putting it down and driving off without it, but that was a bit nervy if you ask me. If you find something that has an address and return info on it, you should really return it to the rightful person (ie: calling the shipping company and telling them about it). I know a lot of people don't do that anymore, but I've been on the other end, and I wouldn't be able to do it with a clear conscience.

And this morning, annoying co-worker was screaming about being owed $120 in bounced check fees...... Maybe next time she won't float her bank account. Me? I came out just fine, because I know how to plan......

[cj1991]

So you are in a niche market and they think they will take their business elsewhere?

Sometiems I wonder how these people made it to adulthood thinking that everyone can read tehir mind and that manners = showing throat all the time. Then I read other posts about Pwecious Snowflakes.

We have a handful of competition (and it gets smaller every year). For each of our two divisions, we have about 4 or 5 competitors, and only one or two on each side is any "threat".

They are welcome to take their money elsewhere. They're get inferior product. I hope they enjoy it.

[cj1991]

*sigh* Everyone does... and why do you worry about the size? If you can please your SO...

I SO needed that laugh. Thanks!

[cj1991]

"Ok your having difficulty giving me necessary details to help match your product. Does your Cell have a camera? If so and if your cell also has email then you can take a picture of your product and email that picture to us at company@email.com. Talk to your cell provider for exact steps for using it's phone and email. Have a wonderful day."

That's actually a good idea, and we do ask for pictures in a number of cases, but in this case, I wouldn't have been able to tell the measurement I needed from a picture.

In fact, I had someone see a picture of something in our catelog once. Any of our products in that line could be made with that color configuration, but the SC kept asking me over and over "which is the exact product in that photo". I couldn't tell them. We re-use photos, and it was probably taken years ago before I even worked there. They coudln't understand when I kept saying "we can make any of them to look like that". They just kept asking.......over and over and over. I finally asked which one they wanted to buy, and then said I'd ask, and came back after a minute of them on hold and said "Yep - it's the one you want".

[bainsidhe]

We re-use photos, and it was probably taken years ago before I even worked there.

Ah yes. Something we often see are installations that have been around for years. Some of them even from before I was born. A customer calls and expects me to tell them what they have. Sadly it doesn't work that way. And yes, the customer will need to uninstall the item to tell me what a particular dimension is. But that may cause damage/injury/a mess you say? That's unfortunate, but I still can't pick a configuration out of thin air. And emailing me a photo may tell me they type of item you have, but not the actual configuration. Is something glass or plastic, for example. Does this measure 1/2" or 3/4"? And can I tell a particular dimension when your photo is completely blurred (that one happened yesterday). Still, I mostly deal with buyers from other companies. I may still deal with stupidity, but I usually don't deal with the general public. A mighty blessing, that.