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  • Sarcasm goes over SC's head.

    I went over to a chavvy family (UK version of trailer trash). Now, I don't know what came over the father of this group (who was with his equally chavvy wife), but he said this.

    SC: Hey, hey, hey, pal, do you fancy me?

    Note: I am a straight male. And even if I was gay, I think my standards would be higher than a toothless bald man.

    The four chavs started to laugh. I just carried on clearing tables.

    SC: Hey, hey, seriously, do you fancy me?

    They laughed again.

    SC: Hey, hey, do you want to go do something?

    I responded in the most sarcastic tone ever.

    Me: You know, it's VERY tempting, but unfortunately I don't finish for another four hours. Maybe later, yeah??

    I walked away.

    SC: Ewwww he's gay!!

  • #2
    Honey, Idiots don't know what sarcasm is so it's not worth saying to their faces.

    *pats*

    It's okay, you didn't know.
    Ridiculous 2009 Predictions: Evil Queen will beat Martha Stewart to death with a muffin pan. All hail Evil Queen! (Some things don't need elaboration.....) -- Jester

    Ridiculous 2010 Predictions: Evil Queen, after escaping prison for last years prediction, goes out and waffle irons Rachel Ray to death. -- SG15Z

    Ridiculous 2011 Prediction: Evil Queen will beat Gordon Ramsay over the head with a cast-iron skillet. -- FireHeart

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    • #3
      I had a sarcastic moment go completely over my ex's head once. For those of you who don't know about her, she's lazy, useless, can't hold down a job, and could never even be counted on to take care of our son.

      One time, after we were split up but still sort of on speaking terms, she called me for something -- I don't remember what -- and commented about how "stressed out" she was. I asked her, "From what?" in a tone that means, "How could you be stressed out? You don't do anything!" It completely went over her head.
      Sometimes life is altered.
      Break from the ropes your hands are tied.
      Uneasy with confrontation.
      Won't turn out right. Can't turn out right

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      • #4
        Whenever people ask me if I'm gay, I just say:

        "Is that wishfull thinking I hear?"

        They usually get it, if not, I'm gone by the time they collect what wits they have.
        I like things that go *bang!*

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        • #5
          Quoth Wingates_Hellsing View Post
          Whenever people ask me if I'm gay, I just say:

          "Is that wishfull thinking I hear?"
          This one guy I knew at college got this crazy idea that I was gay -- until he found out I was messing around with his girlfriend.

          Yeah, I was bad back then.
          Sometimes life is altered.
          Break from the ropes your hands are tied.
          Uneasy with confrontation.
          Won't turn out right. Can't turn out right

          Comment


          • #6
            Quoth MadMike View Post
            This one guy I knew at college got this crazy idea that I was gay -- until he found out I was messing around with his girlfriend.

            Yeah, I was bad back then.
            Bad or baaaaaddd....?
            Ridiculous 2009 Predictions: Evil Queen will beat Martha Stewart to death with a muffin pan. All hail Evil Queen! (Some things don't need elaboration.....) -- Jester

            Ridiculous 2010 Predictions: Evil Queen, after escaping prison for last years prediction, goes out and waffle irons Rachel Ray to death. -- SG15Z

            Ridiculous 2011 Prediction: Evil Queen will beat Gordon Ramsay over the head with a cast-iron skillet. -- FireHeart

            Comment


            • #7
              Quoth MadMike View Post
              This one guy I knew at college got this crazy idea that I was gay -- until he found out I was messing around with his girlfriend.

              Yeah, I was bad back then.
              Yeah you were bad, but at least that removed all doubt from his mind.

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              • #8
                Sar-chasm -

                The gaping crevice between your sharp wit, and their dull mind.
                Carpe Jugulum : Go for the throat.

                Comment


                • #9
                  Quoth Wingates_Hellsing View Post
                  Whenever people ask me if I'm gay, I just say:

                  "Is that wishfull thinking I hear?"
                  well, yes, it is wishful thinking

                  then again, I can truly throw them a curve ball and say 'yes'... funny how that derails their line of thought (that may be giving them too much credit to say they have thoughts )
                  If you wish to find meaning, listen to the music not the song

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                  • #10
                    Quoth MadMike View Post
                    Yeah, I was bad back then.
                    When you're good you're great, when you're bad you're better!
                    A PSA, if I may, as well as another.

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                    • #11
                      Quoth crazylegs View Post
                      When you're good you're great, when you're bad you're better!
                      If you can't be good, be good at it!
                      "So, if you wanna put places like that outta business, just stop being so rock-chewingly stupid." ~ Raudf, 9/19/13

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                      • #12
                        Quoth Peppergirl View Post
                        If you can't be good, be good at it!
                        If you can't be good, be careful.
                        A PSA, if I may, as well as another.

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Quoth smileyeagle1021 View Post
                          well, yes, it is wishful thinking

                          then again, I can truly throw them a curve ball and say 'yes'... funny how that derails their line of thought (that may be giving them too much credit to say they have thoughts )
                          "yes" was always the best response I've found.. tends to leave them sputtering.. lots of my straight friends will say yes too, just because it's so effective ^_^
                          "If looks could really kill, my occupation would be staring" Brand New - I Will Play My Game Beneath The Spin Light

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                          • #14
                            Quoth smileyeagle1021 View Post
                            then again, I can truly throw them a curve ball and say 'yes'... funny how that derails their line of thought (that may be giving them too much credit to say they have thoughts )
                            My response wavers between "Depends who's asking" and "Only on weekends", oh and for one guy "For you, the answer is always yes"
                            If I dropped everybody who occasionally said something stupid from my list of potential partners, I wouldn’t even be able to masturbate

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                            • #15
                              Quoth crazylegs View Post
                              If you can't be good, be careful.
                              And if you can't be careful, be-autiful!
                              "All I've ever learned from love was how to shoot somebody who out-drew ya"

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