Cashiers-do the jokesters ever get on your nerves?

[XCashier]

Many's the time I was tempted to draw up a chart with the various "jokes" on each line. Then every time a customer said one, I'd make a very obvious tick on the appropriate line. Then they'd see they're not exactly funny or original.

It's a good thing I'm an ex-cashier, otherwise I might find myself fired for that.

[tigger222]

"I didn't see you standing there you must have been hiding from me."
"You can't escape right now I just brought some work for you to do."
"Well you aren't you doing anything so I'm here so that you can do some work."
And then I usually get some twenty one year smartass who replies to "Can I see your id?" with "No I don't feel like showing it to you." as they are pulling it out of their wallet. This is one the I have noticed that is only done by guys.

[katie kaboom]

It's a good thing I'm an ex-cashier, otherwise I might find myself fired for that.

Yeah but what a way to go out.

[katie kaboom]

And then I usually get some twenty one year smartass who replies to "Can I see your id?" with "No I don't feel like showing it to you." as they are pulling it out of their wallet.

Then I don't feel like selling you the smokes/beer. How does that grab ya?

[Lace Neil Singer]

*coughs and points to the URL at the bottom of the comic*

I'm not blind, you know. I just can't find the actual comic page that I have in the webcomic, as surely you should have guessed. -.- I find that with webcomics; someone links me to one, and I never can find the page they're talking about. -.- Which is probably why my friend sent me the actual comic saved to an image host instead.

Another one; variation on "Printed it this morning" is "Don't worry, it's not fake, so you don't have to check it." O RLY? I'm supposed to take your word for it, right? It'll be a cold day in hell before I take a customer's word for anything.

[thatcrazyredhead]

Oh, I hate all those lame jokes so much! I've worked as a cashier on and off quite a bit over the years, and I always resented having to force a laugh just to make some eejit feel better about himself (sorry, guys, but I cannot remember hearing a woman make any of those jokes even once). I've always wanted to burst out laughing, as convincingly as possible while being completely over the top, just to see what they'd do. Something like, "Hahahahaha! That is so funny! Hahahahaha! Because if it doesn't scan, there's no price, and no price must mean free ahahahahahaha! *holds belly, smacks hand on counter, laughs more* Oh, I've never heard anyone say that before, how original! And it's funny because the store is obviously not going ot give stuff away for free, so to suggest something so obviously stupid makes it a joke, right? Hahahahahahaha! *wipes tears from eyes* You are so clever! I'm going to have to remember that. Whoo! Oh, I just need a minute to recover from that joke. You are so funny!"

[Ironclad Alibi]

I don't know where it came from...

*coughs and points to the URL at the bottom of the comic*

I'm not blind, you know. I just can't find the actual comic page that I have in the webcomic, as surely you should have guessed.

Here it is:

Link to dont-let-this-happen-to-you comic

And now I have another web comic archive to read.

[Boozy]

Customers don't realize that their jokes have been heard a thousand times before. I've been in retail for so many years now that I've heard even the most original jokes about a dozen times. There are only so many clever or not-so-clever things you can say about the simple exchange of money for goods and services.

If a customer makes a good-natured joke, no matter how trite, I'll force a laugh. They're trying to be friendly, and its the polite thing to do to acknowledge that. But it does get on my nerves.

Hearing the same jokes over and over again is repetitive stress on the brain. The cashier's version of carpal tunnel.

[Jay 2K Winger]

Ah, the jokesters...

"You look bored."
"I AM bored."

"You look thrilled to be here."
(deadpan) "It's like a party everyday. Some days I can barely contain my giddiness."

"It's so quiet in here!"
"DON'T SAY THAT! Don't you know how Murphy's Law of Retail works?!"

"It must be free!"
"Nope. That's never worked in the entire eight years I've worked here."

(When I'm working FDLP)
*handing me the receipt* "I stole all this."
*reading receipt* "Yup, and you paid $<amount> for the privilege of stealing it."

[edible_hat]

(When I'm working FDLP)
*handing me the receipt* "I stole all this."
*reading receipt* "Yup, and you paid $<amount> for the privilege of stealing it."

Next time somebody tries that, sit on them until the cops get there. That would actually make it funny.

[Bella_Vixen]

I hate when people ask if I'm "open for business."

It makes me feel like a low class prostitute.

[Boggles]

SC: I just printed that twenty.
ME: Hmmmmmm... Not bad work really. I'll give you twelve quid for it.

SC: Instead of breaking a note can I get rid of some of these pound coins on you?
ME: Certainly. I'll give you fifty pence in the pound for them.

SC: And I want the winning lotto ticket this time.
ME: ok, these numbers will definitely come out. I just can't guarantee that it will be this week.

SC: it's the last one, it should be cheaper.
ME: actually it now has rarity value so it's ten pound more!

SC: why don't you stock incredibly obscure magazine monthly?
ME: Theres no demand. You wouldn't believe many people I have to say that to!