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  • #1

    Salt and Pepper Customer

    Two co-workers dealt with this guy. One of them was off duty, was wearing his normal clothes and drinking a coffee at the end of the bar. The other co-worker was working, and she is preganant. And the hormones are starting to show...

    PCW: Pregnant Co-worker
    CW: Off duty co-worker
    SC: Who else?

    The pub was very quiet. I was in the middle of polishing all the beer pumps I was that bored. The SC walked up to the bar and mumbled something to PCW. PCW didn't hear what he said...

    PCW: I'm sorry?
    SC: I SAID I WANT SALT AND PEPPER!!!
    PCW: Oh...umm...the salt and pepper is just kept at the cabinet on your left sir.

    PCW was a bit shaken by this. The SC turned around, and went to his RIGHT!

    PCW: No sir, your LEFT.
    SC: WHAT?!?!
    PCW: They're over there on your LEFT.
    SC: WHAT?!?! WHERE IS THE SALT AND PEPPER?!?!
    PCW: Right there, about six feet from your left!
    SC: I CAN'T SEE THEM!!

    Off duty co-worker jumped in.

    CW: YOUR LEFT! YOU KNOW! THE THING THAT IS OPPOSITE TO YOUR RIGHT!

    The SC actually got it this time! He went to his left, and walked up to the cabinet.

    SC: YOU'VE RUN OUT OF SALT AND PEPPER!!

    OK, that was impossible. The salt, pepper and all the other condiments are stored in massive jars on this cabinet. We had been dead all day. There was NO WAY we had run out!

    PCW's hormones kicked in. She stormed up to the cabinet, which was completely stocked.

    PCW: Oh! What's this then?!

    She stuck her hands into the sachets of salt and pepper, grabbed about twenty of each, and placed them into the SC's hands. He tutted at her and walked away. PCW walked back to the bar, growling and clenching her fists.

    I think the next few months with her are going to be eventful...
    Tags: None
  • #2
    Ok does someone need to be reminded the difference between right and left? Jeez was he deaf or something? And blind too!?

    Comment

    • #3
      Your coworkers will like the phrase they use in the military

      "Your other left!"

      Comment

      • #4
        What, she wasn't going to FETCH them to his table? That's just bad customer service.

        Quoth PepperElf View Post
        Your coworkers will like the phrase they use in the military

        "Your other left!"
        I thought that was just my family.
        "For the love of all that is holy and 4 things that aren’t but feel pretty good anyway" ~ Gravekeeper

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        • #5
          Im sure this is obvious.... Alcohol related FAIL?
          There Can Be Only One

          Comment

          • #6
            Alchohol multiplies stupidity, so it's obvious this guy was already imbecilic and had already had two or three beers... making him dumber than a pile of rocks (at least the rocks know how to stay still and not bother anyone).
            I like things that go *bang!*

            Comment

            • #7
              Quoth SG15Z View Post
              Ok does someone need to be reminded the difference between right and left?
              My girlfriend does.... Whenever I tell her something involving left/right, she has to hold up her hands with her thumbs out to see which one makes an "L" in order to remember which is left and which is right. Its the one thing that no matter how hard she tries, she can't remember.

              -"babe, where's the good knife?"
              --"In the drawer to your right. No. Your RIGHT. Your RIGHT! *sigh* YOUR OTHER RIGHT"

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              • #8
                Quoth Wingates_Hellsing View Post
                already had two or three beers...
                So he's a lightweight?
                "For the love of all that is holy and 4 things that aren’t but feel pretty good anyway" ~ Gravekeeper

                Comment

                • #9
                  Quoth HorrorFrogPrincess View Post
                  I thought that was just my family.
                  Mine too.

                  Considering how my pregnancy hormones have been going crazy lately, I'm surprised PCW kept it as together as she did.
                  "Enough expository banter. It's time we fight like men. And ladies. And ladies who dress like men. For Gilgamesh...IT'S MORPHING TIME!"
                  - Gilgamesh, Final Fantasy V

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                  • #10
                    Oh FARK! Doesn't this guy know that pissing off people who are in the throes of hormonal imbalances can be the trigger to him having his head ripped off so she can empty her baby-stomped on bladder into his neck?
                    I never lost my faith in humanity. Can't lose what you never had right?

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                    • #11
                      My best friend Neets is dyslexic. Now, she doesn't make a big deal out of it, but I have learned from experience that when she is driving and I am navigating from the passenger seat, saying "left" or "right" is not the best idea. I just say "your side" or "my side." she understands THAT immediately.

                      And no, I am not suggesting that the SC was dyslexic. As usual, I just think he was a fucking idiot.

                      "The Customer Is Always Right...But The Bartender Decides Who Is                       Still A Customer."

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                      • #12


                        People do the EXACT same thing no matter the job....

                        IC: Hey where do you have the lids?
                        Me: Right behind you.
                        *IC looks to their right*
                        Me: No on the wall.
                        *IC looks to their left towards the stinking LINE*
                        Me: No behind you!
                        IC: oooooh now which ones are the 32 oz ones?
                        Me: The ones on the left...no your left...one more...yes that's...NO THAT'S A 21 OZ!!!

                        Directionally challenged customer: Where are your chips?
                        Me: *Resisting the "You seriously did not just say that" look* Behind you.
                        *looks around*
                        Me: No behind you! THERE! *points*
                        DDC: uh okay. Now where are the baked lays?
                        Me: The top...no the top...That's the middle...no the dead top! THE TOP SHELF!
                        Kangaroo Squee!

                        Comment

                        • #13
                          Happens at the cinema, all the time.

                          Me: takes ticket "Screen 1 first on the left."
                          Customer: heads for screen 8 on the right.
                          "I can tell her you're all tied up in the projection room." Sunset Boulevard.

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