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Hello all! I am a long time stalker (2 years). I have always wanted to contribute, but I am in a non customer interacting position. Finally, I remembered way, way, back to my camp counseling days ( like 4 years ago! Ancient times). Hopefully I will bring some unique and humorous posts to brighten your day. Ok, there was the introduction, so onto the promised hat rape.
Background: I worked for several years at a truly awesome camp. This was and will be my best job ever. To give you an idea of my connection to the place, I spent all together as camper, counselor, and administrator 18 summers at the place. That is I was a camper when I had just turned 5, and I worked there through high school and college until I eventually had to grow up and get a "real"job. In this story I am in my third summer as a counselor, and I was in charge of the oldest boy cabins (ages 12 - 15).
This whole incident came about, as it usually did. Little teen/preteen boys cannot keep a secret to save their lives. A friend tells a friend whom they have sworn to secrecy who tells 2 friends they have sworn to secrecy and so on. When it got back to us it was only a rumor, but through some brilliant detective work we got the full story and the principle players.
Apparently, there was a cute girl in the oldest girl cabins that one of the campers had a crush on. Well, as you might imagine, the boy logically took the girls hat and he and another kid jerked off into it after lights out one night. I mean how else is the girl going to know that you like her right? Oh thats right! You give it back to her the next day without telling her about the surprise you left for her. Perfect plan. Expect then you swear others to secrecy until it gets back to her. When it got back to her she told the counselor who was in charge of the oldest girls (my wife now incidentally), who told me.
That is when I brought down the wrath of the gods on the 2 perps. Now of the two that did it, one of them was genuinely a good kid who had succumbed to peer pressure, but was sorry for more than getting caught. I liked him. We shall call him "Scott". The other kid scares me to this day. Looking into his eyes is like looking into the eyes of a Kardashian. There is no life behind those eyes. I believe him to be an evil soulless conscience-less void. He was not sorry for his actions or that he got caught. We shall call him Damien.
When we had gotten the story straight and identified the parties involved, we revealed our plan to them. They would each write a letter of apology to the girl, and then they would have to call their parents and tell them what they had done.
Lets think about that for a second. I was making a teenager call his mom, and explain to her that he had just jerked off into a girls hat and let her wear it. Personally, if it had been me, I would have opted for a quick and painful suicide. Seriously, I do not know if I would physically be able to accomplish that task.
Scott reacted how I expected. He broke down and cried in heaving sobs and pleaded. Damien turned his demon eyes on me. Absent of anger, fear, hate, happiness, any emotion and simply agreed. What is it about a kid not caring about being punished that makes you want to punch him? Well I set them to work writing their letters. Scott is getting his letter grubby and tear stained. Damien is breezing through his. So I leave them alone to get their files and home numbers in preparation and not 2 minutes later Damien drops his letter off. It basically said he was peer pressured into it, and was quite aggressive. Getting more pissed off at him by the second, I went out crumpled it up in front of his face and threw it away, and then told him to try again and to pretend to actually be sorry. Scott meanwhile was still working on his. Damien wisely took longer, and when I came out to check again, Scott was finished with his. I was going to take it back to the office and read it there, but then remembered Damien's and decided not to waste a trip and read it in front of him in case a rewrite was in order. This proved to be a mistake.
I was only able to read the first sentence of his dirty, tear stained, horribly spelled, and bad handwritten note. That first sentence said "I sorry mastribait in hat". I quickly turned around and escaped to the office before I collapsed with laughter. Poor kid!
To wrap up. They both called there parents, Scott crying the whole time while Damien didn't even care. Scott did eventually redeem himself, but fortunately I have never seen Damien again. I presume he is still out there somewhere pissing off retail workers and demanding service befitting his dark royal lineage.
Ok. That is my first story. I hope you have all enjoyed, and if you have a have plenty of other stories to share that feature bed wetting, bad parenting, and just plain weird kids.
Background: I worked for several years at a truly awesome camp. This was and will be my best job ever. To give you an idea of my connection to the place, I spent all together as camper, counselor, and administrator 18 summers at the place. That is I was a camper when I had just turned 5, and I worked there through high school and college until I eventually had to grow up and get a "real"job. In this story I am in my third summer as a counselor, and I was in charge of the oldest boy cabins (ages 12 - 15).
This whole incident came about, as it usually did. Little teen/preteen boys cannot keep a secret to save their lives. A friend tells a friend whom they have sworn to secrecy who tells 2 friends they have sworn to secrecy and so on. When it got back to us it was only a rumor, but through some brilliant detective work we got the full story and the principle players.
Apparently, there was a cute girl in the oldest girl cabins that one of the campers had a crush on. Well, as you might imagine, the boy logically took the girls hat and he and another kid jerked off into it after lights out one night. I mean how else is the girl going to know that you like her right? Oh thats right! You give it back to her the next day without telling her about the surprise you left for her. Perfect plan. Expect then you swear others to secrecy until it gets back to her. When it got back to her she told the counselor who was in charge of the oldest girls (my wife now incidentally), who told me.
That is when I brought down the wrath of the gods on the 2 perps. Now of the two that did it, one of them was genuinely a good kid who had succumbed to peer pressure, but was sorry for more than getting caught. I liked him. We shall call him "Scott". The other kid scares me to this day. Looking into his eyes is like looking into the eyes of a Kardashian. There is no life behind those eyes. I believe him to be an evil soulless conscience-less void. He was not sorry for his actions or that he got caught. We shall call him Damien.
When we had gotten the story straight and identified the parties involved, we revealed our plan to them. They would each write a letter of apology to the girl, and then they would have to call their parents and tell them what they had done.
Lets think about that for a second. I was making a teenager call his mom, and explain to her that he had just jerked off into a girls hat and let her wear it. Personally, if it had been me, I would have opted for a quick and painful suicide. Seriously, I do not know if I would physically be able to accomplish that task.
Scott reacted how I expected. He broke down and cried in heaving sobs and pleaded. Damien turned his demon eyes on me. Absent of anger, fear, hate, happiness, any emotion and simply agreed. What is it about a kid not caring about being punished that makes you want to punch him? Well I set them to work writing their letters. Scott is getting his letter grubby and tear stained. Damien is breezing through his. So I leave them alone to get their files and home numbers in preparation and not 2 minutes later Damien drops his letter off. It basically said he was peer pressured into it, and was quite aggressive. Getting more pissed off at him by the second, I went out crumpled it up in front of his face and threw it away, and then told him to try again and to pretend to actually be sorry. Scott meanwhile was still working on his. Damien wisely took longer, and when I came out to check again, Scott was finished with his. I was going to take it back to the office and read it there, but then remembered Damien's and decided not to waste a trip and read it in front of him in case a rewrite was in order. This proved to be a mistake.
I was only able to read the first sentence of his dirty, tear stained, horribly spelled, and bad handwritten note. That first sentence said "I sorry mastribait in hat". I quickly turned around and escaped to the office before I collapsed with laughter. Poor kid!
To wrap up. They both called there parents, Scott crying the whole time while Damien didn't even care. Scott did eventually redeem himself, but fortunately I have never seen Damien again. I presume he is still out there somewhere pissing off retail workers and demanding service befitting his dark royal lineage.
Ok. That is my first story. I hope you have all enjoyed, and if you have a have plenty of other stories to share that feature bed wetting, bad parenting, and just plain weird kids.
Hello, fellow Virginians!
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