Hi, Ive been reading this for years and never really felt the need to add my own, but then I got reminded of Terry [surname withheld to protect the asshat]
I worked at a local pub for a while for about enough money to fend off starvation and luckily I was forewarned about the local scammer. He only tried me once:
Cast: Me, T, Local drunks.
T: pint of carling (hands me a fiver)
Me: (pours, holds five in left hand resting on till, hands pint then change to T) carling, and your change £x.xx (i forget)
T: Hey! I gave you a tenner! (Local Drunks nearby go quiet, occasional chuckle)
Me: (Slowly, Theatrically bring fiver in left hand up to my face, examine it) Are you sure Terry?
T: Yeah! (Locals see which way this is heading, all turn to look at Terry rather than me, chuckling louder)
Me: Absolutly sure? 'Cos I gotta say, this tenner of yours looks suspiciously like a fiver to me
T: You...
Me: (Interrupting)Look! It even says five right there!
(Terry walks off, muttering)
Me: (calling after him) And I coulda sworn this picture is Elizabeth Fry! doesnt she only appear on the five? Terry? Terry!
Very smug of me, but I reckon he deserved every word
Not allowed a signature yet, but when Im allowed one it'll be:
The customer is always right! Which is a shame, as my gun pulls to the left
I worked at a local pub for a while for about enough money to fend off starvation and luckily I was forewarned about the local scammer. He only tried me once:
Cast: Me, T, Local drunks.
T: pint of carling (hands me a fiver)
Me: (pours, holds five in left hand resting on till, hands pint then change to T) carling, and your change £x.xx (i forget)
T: Hey! I gave you a tenner! (Local Drunks nearby go quiet, occasional chuckle)
Me: (Slowly, Theatrically bring fiver in left hand up to my face, examine it) Are you sure Terry?
T: Yeah! (Locals see which way this is heading, all turn to look at Terry rather than me, chuckling louder)
Me: Absolutly sure? 'Cos I gotta say, this tenner of yours looks suspiciously like a fiver to me
T: You...
Me: (Interrupting)Look! It even says five right there!
(Terry walks off, muttering)
Me: (calling after him) And I coulda sworn this picture is Elizabeth Fry! doesnt she only appear on the five? Terry? Terry!
Very smug of me, but I reckon he deserved every word
Not allowed a signature yet, but when Im allowed one it'll be:
The customer is always right! Which is a shame, as my gun pulls to the left
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