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WARNING: Contains epic fail. Viower Excretion Advisd. 
First Wednesday of the month, and you all know what that means! Irv running his ass off doing one carryout after another while shepherding needy, pestering, flatulent seasoned citizens to the toilet paper, the candy, the Super Colon Blow, the Oops I Crapped My Pants disposable undergarments, and whatever else they feel like throwing their Social Security checks at.
The day got off to a rousing start at 8:05 am, when some crotchety old skinbag called up the service desk to inform the person there that we screwed up his prescription, that the person answering his call is, and I quote, a "fucking bitch," that we at the clearance swamp have no idea what we're doing, and that he got a refund for the supposedly screwed-up prescription, which makes me wonder why he even bothered to call us in the first place, but I guess he had to get some things off his chest anyway. Service desk person transferred him over to a manager, who listened to his exclamation without a point for a while until she got sick of it and hung up. Or gave him a gift card for his trouble. I dunno.
And from that point on, the service desk got treated to a telephone parade of crotchety old farts calling in to engage in basically the same conversation over and over again.
"YOU OVERCHARGED ME!!!!oneone!!panda! I looked at my receipt and my senior discount didn't come off like it should have?"
"Did you buy any electronics or anything from household supplies?"
"YES! I had toilet paper and laundry soap! YOU'RE RIPPING OFF OLD PEOPLE! Rabble rabble rabble!"
"Toilet paper and laundry detergent are excluded from the senior discount. It says so right in our ad this week."
"Well it came off last time!" (Lie, unless the "last time" the caller is referring to was over a year ago.)
And now, the aforementioned epic fail. Don't read if you value your brain cells:
So as I was coming back in from a carryout and trailing four rambunctious boys playing a game called "Let's Run Around And Punch Each Other," I got stopped by an old lady carrying a pull tag for a big outdoor patio rug. She said we had no more of this rug on the floor and she wanted to make sure we had it.
I scanned the tag and found no backstock location for the rug, and no display on the floor, and none of that rug in on-hands. So I told her we were sold out.
"Uhh, you had tags for this rug out on Monday and there's no more of it now? I don't believe you sold $200 worth of this rug in two days!" This was accompanied by a textbook cat's ass face.
"Well, everything's on clearance in patio and you'd be surprised how fast it's selling."
"Well really now, I picked up this tag Monday, and now I come here today and you tell me you don't have it in stock anymore? I don't believe you!"
*tirescreech*
Let me repeat what this dry-pool diving team member did: She took the pull tag for this rug home with her on Monday, came back to the store with it on Wednesday, and was shocked, JUST SHOCKED, we no longer had the rug in stock even though we marked it down to under a hundred bucks from two hundred or so. In other words, she decided to hold off on buying the rug until she could get her senior discount on it, and thought that by taking the tag home with her she'd have one saved Just For Her.
Sadly, this evidently happens fairly frequently, according to the service desk person who was working today.
I handed her off to the service desk before I got tempted to tell her just how much of a bleeding moron she evidently is. She made them call a bunch of other stores to locate this rug for her, because this was all "our mistake."
It never ceases to amaze me what some people will do to save a few sheckels. They ain't making them any smarter.
First Wednesday of the month, and you all know what that means! Irv running his ass off doing one carryout after another while shepherding needy, pestering, flatulent seasoned citizens to the toilet paper, the candy, the Super Colon Blow, the Oops I Crapped My Pants disposable undergarments, and whatever else they feel like throwing their Social Security checks at.
The day got off to a rousing start at 8:05 am, when some crotchety old skinbag called up the service desk to inform the person there that we screwed up his prescription, that the person answering his call is, and I quote, a "fucking bitch," that we at the clearance swamp have no idea what we're doing, and that he got a refund for the supposedly screwed-up prescription, which makes me wonder why he even bothered to call us in the first place, but I guess he had to get some things off his chest anyway. Service desk person transferred him over to a manager, who listened to his exclamation without a point for a while until she got sick of it and hung up. Or gave him a gift card for his trouble. I dunno.
And from that point on, the service desk got treated to a telephone parade of crotchety old farts calling in to engage in basically the same conversation over and over again.
"YOU OVERCHARGED ME!!!!oneone!!panda! I looked at my receipt and my senior discount didn't come off like it should have?"
"Did you buy any electronics or anything from household supplies?"
"YES! I had toilet paper and laundry soap! YOU'RE RIPPING OFF OLD PEOPLE! Rabble rabble rabble!"
"Toilet paper and laundry detergent are excluded from the senior discount. It says so right in our ad this week."
"Well it came off last time!" (Lie, unless the "last time" the caller is referring to was over a year ago.)
And now, the aforementioned epic fail. Don't read if you value your brain cells:
So as I was coming back in from a carryout and trailing four rambunctious boys playing a game called "Let's Run Around And Punch Each Other," I got stopped by an old lady carrying a pull tag for a big outdoor patio rug. She said we had no more of this rug on the floor and she wanted to make sure we had it.
I scanned the tag and found no backstock location for the rug, and no display on the floor, and none of that rug in on-hands. So I told her we were sold out.
"Uhh, you had tags for this rug out on Monday and there's no more of it now? I don't believe you sold $200 worth of this rug in two days!" This was accompanied by a textbook cat's ass face.
"Well, everything's on clearance in patio and you'd be surprised how fast it's selling."
"Well really now, I picked up this tag Monday, and now I come here today and you tell me you don't have it in stock anymore? I don't believe you!"
*tirescreech*
Let me repeat what this dry-pool diving team member did: She took the pull tag for this rug home with her on Monday, came back to the store with it on Wednesday, and was shocked, JUST SHOCKED, we no longer had the rug in stock even though we marked it down to under a hundred bucks from two hundred or so. In other words, she decided to hold off on buying the rug until she could get her senior discount on it, and thought that by taking the tag home with her she'd have one saved Just For Her.
Sadly, this evidently happens fairly frequently, according to the service desk person who was working today.I handed her off to the service desk before I got tempted to tell her just how much of a bleeding moron she evidently is. She made them call a bunch of other stores to locate this rug for her, because this was all "our mistake."
It never ceases to amaze me what some people will do to save a few sheckels. They ain't making them any smarter.
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