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Lamest Excuse Ever

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  • #1

    Lamest Excuse Ever

    My store got held up Thursday night.

    Guy with a gun in his belt, took about three hundred in cash and four cartons of Marlboros. In and out in about three minutes.

    My assistant manager was really shaken up, but NOBODY GOT HURT. And the cops think they'll be able to grab the guy. No mask or disguise while robbing the store with more cameras than the average wedding reception.

    Anyway, what really pissed me, and my assistant manager, off about the guy?

    The way he kept telling Tom, "It's not you, it's the economy."

    What the HELL! "It's not you, it's the economy?" Look tell me anything. Tell me you're going to blow it all on liquor and loose women, tell me you've got a NASTY comic book habit, tell me you do coke in boxcar lots. But don't tell me that.

    Because lots of us are hurting, lots of us hurt in the past, lots of us will hurt in the future. But we'll, somehow, manage to avoid robbing convenience stores.

    "It's not you, it's the economy?" Give me a break.
    Last edited by TonyDonuts; 08-01-2009, 02:40 PM. Reason: incomplete
    I have a map of the world. It's actual size.

    -- Steven Wright
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  • #2
    Laaaaaaaaaame with a capital L. What a dumbass.
    I don't get paid enough to kiss your a**! -Groezig 5/31/08
    Another day...another million braincells lost...-Sarlon 6/16/08
    Chivalry is not dead. It's just direly underappreciated. -Samaliel 9/15/09

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    • #3
      LOL gimme a break. They'll blame just about anything on the economy eh?? So next thing we know, some axe murderer will be using that line at his trail.

      "See you're honor, it wasn't my fault, its this economy".
      Sorry, my love cannot be bought. And if it could, you obviously don't have enough in your account to do so.

      ~Do not pass go, Do not collect $200. You lose, my friend, you lose~

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      • #4
        They said on the news that the economy was causing it so it must be true.

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        • #5
          Why do I have the feeling that'll be his defense if and when he's caught? I can just see him now up in front of the judge, pleading not guilty because it's not his fault, it's the economy!

          Too bad he did not step out in front of an oncoming 18 wheeler during his getaway.

          Hopefully the f*ckwad gets caught, and does some serious jail time.
          "500 bucks, that's almost a million!"
          ~Curly from the 3 Stooges

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          • #6
            You know, I'm struggling in "this economy" too, b ut you don't see me holding up other people in "this economy" at fnucking gunpoint.

            Douchebag.
            "Oh, you hate your job? There's a club for that. It's called EVERYBODY, and they meet down at the bar." ~Drew Carey

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            • #7
              What he should have said:

              "It's not you, it's me."

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              • #8
                Quoth TonyDonuts View Post
                My store got held up Thursday night.

                Guy with a gun in his belt, took about three hundred in cash and four cartons of Marlboros. In and out in about three minutes.

                One quit smoking brand name smokes robber dude-seriously at over $70 a carton here-RYO at $30 is a bargin.

                Two-"in this economy"-guns are still high ticket items-mine was almost $400 used.
                Honestly.... the image of that in my head made me go "AWESOME!"..... and then I remembered I am terribly strange.-Red dazes

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                • #9
                  Wow. Just...wow.

                  I mean, I could understand if he was stealing diapers...



                  But...the economy?
                  Yeah, definitely lame.
                  "Chaos in the midst of chaos isn't funny, but chaos in the midst of order is." - Steve Martin

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                  • #10
                    "It's not you, it's the economy."

                    Wonder if this SC has used that excuse for not paying his bills . . . .
                    Human Resources - the adult version of "I'm telling Mom." - Agent Anthony "Tony" DiNozzo (NCIS)

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                    • #11
                      Quoth DGoddessChardonnay View Post
                      "It's not you, it's the economy."

                      Wonder if this SC has used that excuse for not paying his bills . . . .
                      I'm sure that excuse has been used more than once, if not by him, by other people.
                      "500 bucks, that's almost a million!"
                      ~Curly from the 3 Stooges

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                      • #12
                        I saw a news video online awhile back of a guy robbing a store.

                        He has a gun pointed at the clerk's face while the poor guy is putting money into the bag and while this is happening the robber says something like:

                        "I'm sorry I didn't want to do this but I don't have a choice. My daughter needs to eat."

                        EDIT: Just found the video, the dude brought the kid WITH HIM on the robbery!

                        http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ankVp...eature=related


                        WTF???

                        Food stamps, food banks, churches. Come on dude, there's got to be a better way of feeding your kid than knocking off a 7-11.
                        Last edited by CrazedClerkthe2nd; 08-02-2009, 10:17 PM.
                        "If we refund your money, give you a free replacement and shoot the manager, then will you be happy?" - sign seen in a restaurant

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