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Attack of the "Flat Sandwich" Woman.

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  • Attack of the "Flat Sandwich" Woman.

    This tale happened as recently as 15 minutes ago. I just got off work and CS was the first site I loaded up just to tell this story.

    My co-worker was already helping some people when this woman walks in. I tell her I can help her over here when she's ready. She starts out normal enough, and tells me she wants a footlong Spicy Italian.

    This is where she became a picky EW. Not necessarily an SC yet, just picky. You know the types; the ones where they freak out if something isn't on a certain side or made exactly to their specifications. Because obviously the sandwich will TASTE DIFFERENT if something is not on the right side!

    Anyway, she then tells me she wants cheese but on the side. This is the first time someone has ever wanted cheese on the side. Ok, whatever, I go and put 4 slices of cheese in one of the cookie bags.

    Right after the cheese debacle, she wants me to go squirt the mustard into a cup and then get a knife and spread it on her sandwich from there because "your bottles squirt out way too much!" It was annoying but whatever. She at least thanked me for taking the time to do it. I said "no problem." thinking that was going to be the worst of it.

    When I finished up her sandwich, my co-worker was already at the register getting ready to ring up her two people. Their order was seperate and she already had their sandwiches in seperate bags up front. To make sure the sandwiches didn't get mixed up, I put my woman's sandwich into a new bag and held it in my hand to wait for her to get one of the other bags out of the way so they wouldn't get mixed up. I see my customer hawk eyeing me like I had just murdered her first born. I didn't know why. Then when one of the bags was cleared I set her sandwich down. Keep in mind that several other customers have walked into the store and were getting their orders started by the manager.

    This is where she turned into a mega EW complainy bitch.

    SC: My sandwich better not be flat! I want you to open it and check it because you were squeezing it and holding it like that and if it's flat I want you to make me a new one!

    Me. (are you fucking kidding me, here we go again...) *I open the sandwich up and there wasn't anything remotely "flat" about it. The only thing was that our wheat bread was kind of soft and it had the normal "collapsing" of a soft breaded sandwich.*

    (she was going on as if I took a rolling pin out of my back pocket and went to town on her sandwich just for the hell of it! Apparently "flat sandwiches" just don't taste the same!)

    SC: See! Look! It's all flat on that one side! I'm going to need another one!

    (I didn't feel like getting myself fired today so I just let her rant and bitch while I took the next customer. The manager was also at this point asking her what was wrong with it and trying to explain to her that that's what happens when the bread is soft)

    SC just kept on going about how I "flattened" it and how she's "had this issue with me before". Funny how she is the first person to have ever accused me of making "flat sandwiches."

    Manager knew her complaint was rediculous but remade her sandwich, and I told manager to "make sure you get her original sandwich back" because it wouldn't have put it past me if she was trying to scam.

    Then, like how all SCs and EWs make total asses of themselves, she kept on going on about "I'm not a complainer, but ______!!"-----"I don't want to be difficult or anything, but _____!!"

    Irony at its finest.

    After she finally left, all of the other customers started to make fun of her and with my witty blunt sense of humor pretty soon I had the whole store up in laughter over her rediculousness. I kept sarcastially saying "because I obviously carry a rolling pin around with me and whip it out just to give myself a thrill!"
    I even told them that this story was going on the internet as soon as I got home. Even my manager was laughing.
    My Fur Affinity Page:https://www.furaffinity.net/user/thetigress/
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  • #2
    Who cares if the sandwich is flat anyway? She's gonna shove it in her mouth, and that will hopefully keep her quiet for a while.

    I understand people who want decent looking food if they're hosting a banquet or some kind of reception dinner, but if you're going to eat it yourself?

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    • #3
      If she gets that upset about the natural flattening of her sandwich, imagine what will happen when time catches up to her tits.
      "All I've ever learned from love was how to shoot somebody who out-drew ya"

      Comment


      • #4
        Quoth GroceryGIrl View Post
        Who cares if the sandwich is flat anyway? She's gonna shove it in her mouth, and that will hopefully keep her quiet for a while.
        That's exactly my logic! It's not like it's suddenly going to taste different. Now I'd understand if her sandwich suddenly became as thin as a pancake but this sandwich wasn't "flat" in the least. When I was holding it I wasn't squeezing on it at all.

        Quoth Sheldonrs View Post
        If she gets that upset about the natural flattening of her sandwich, imagine what will happen when time catches up to her tits.
        I LOLed.
        My Fur Affinity Page:https://www.furaffinity.net/user/thetigress/
        My Weasyl Page: https://www.weasyl.com/profile/thetigress

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        • #5
          I honestly wonder why they make such a big deal about how it needs to be put on the right side. Becausey eah, it TOTALLY tastes differently!!!!
          Kangaroo Squee!

          Comment


          • #6
            Yeah, isn't this woman going to have to 'flatten' the sandwich a bit in order to EAT IT???

            The only women I've seen that could open their mouths wide enough to fit a Subway sub without 'flattening' it were appearing in movies with John Holmes.

            "Kamala the Ugandan Giant" 1950-2020 • "Bullet" Bob Armstrong 1939-2020 • "Road Warrior Animal" 1960-2020 • "Zeus" Tiny Lister Jr. 1958-2020 • "Hacksaw" Butch Reed 1954-2021 • "New Jack" Jerome Young 1963-2021 • "Mr. Wonderful" Paul Orndorff 1949-2021 • "Beautiful" Bobby Eaton 1958-2021 • Daffney 1975-2021

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            • #7
              This is why I'm glad I no longer work for Subway!

              Quoth Sheldonrs View Post
              If she gets that upset about the natural flattening of her sandwich, imagine what will happen when time catches up to her tits.
              LMFAO
              wouldn't lube work better in a f***ing machine?
              ----
              Yes, that’s right. It’s a pair of gold foil headphones. Gold foil. Finally, headphones just as awful as your taste in music.

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              • #8
                Quoth KaySquirrel View Post
                I joke to my hubby that McD's makes their Sausage And Egg McMuffin wrong, because the cheese is in the middle. The egg should be in the middle, so that the cheese and sausage don't touch. It does make it taste different... But I don't do anything about it other than dream of a day where they assemble it "wrong" so that it's the way I prefer it!
                I seem to recall a PFB letter in which the letter writer complained about the "changed dynamic of the sandwich" because it was assembled out of order.

                I LOLed at that particular turn of phrase.
                Knowledge is power. Power corrupts. Study hard. Be evil.

                "I never said I wasn't a horrible person."--Me, almost daily

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                • #9
                  Quoth GroceryGIrl View Post
                  Who cares if the sandwich is flat anyway? She's gonna shove it in her mouth, and that will hopefully keep her quiet for a while.
                  What REALLY shuts whiny bitches up like her and isn't flat is a nice big fat jawbreaker!!! I think my mind is going down the gutter...FAST.
                  I don't get paid enough to kiss your a**! -Groezig 5/31/08
                  Another day...another million braincells lost...-Sarlon 6/16/08
                  Chivalry is not dead. It's just direly underappreciated. -Samaliel 9/15/09

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Quoth El Pollo Guerrera View Post
                    Yeah, isn't this woman going to have to 'flatten' the sandwich a bit in order to EAT IT???

                    The only women I've seen that could open their mouths wide enough to fit a Subway sub without 'flattening' it were appearing in movies with John Holmes.

                    Maybe she is one of those women.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      I hope to hell this woman never orders a panini.

                      Quoth Sheldonrs View Post
                      If she gets that upset about the natural flattening of her sandwich, imagine what will happen when time catches up to her tits.
                      Damn good thing I'm not eating or drinking right now....

                      Quoth Irving Patrick Freleigh View Post
                      I seem to recall a PFB letter in which the letter writer complained about the "changed dynamic of the sandwich" because it was assembled out of order.

                      I LOLed at that particular turn of phrase.
                      The what of the what now?

                      Quoth tropicsgoddess View Post
                      What REALLY shuts whiny bitches up like her and isn't flat is a nice big fat jawbreaker!!! I think my mind is going down the gutter...FAST.
                      *snerk* Jawbreaker. *snerk*
                      It's floating wicker propelled by fire!

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        OMG someone call the pope! Her mouth is so big that a flat sandwich is a travesty!

                        For the love of christ, make that sandwich as un-flat as possible so her mouth stays filled while eating the damn thing... Hell, take an air hose and pump that bread up!

                        Earth needs at least 1-2 minutes of relief from her constant bitching while she inhales that sandwich.

                        Again, the cruel sarcasm drips from my keyboard.
                        Fixing problems... one broken customer at a time.

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                        • #13
                          I'm currently eating a Subway sandwich. I don't know why customers have to make things more difficult than it seems when they have to order something.

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