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Mary Poppins Woes

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  • #1

    Mary Poppins Woes

    So, this guy calls in today, and I haven't even been on the phones for an hour, not even through my first cup of coffee. It's not even quite 9am. Now, any of you who've talked to me out of here know that I am NOT a morning person and only took this shift so I could go to the store. Anyway.

    Me: Thank you for calling XXX Technical support, my name is RHPG, how may I help you?

    SC: Is there or isn't there a free Disney preview?

    Me: () Excuse me?

    SC: Is there, or isn't there, a f*ing free Disney preview?

    Me: Well, sir I'd be more than happy to check on that for you...

    (Get him verified in between him cussing and sounding annoyed)

    Me: Well sir, I am showing that we do have the Disney subscription on demand freeview weekend this weekend. What error are you getting when you try to order it?

    SC: I keep getting a message that say I have to have a subscription every time I try to order Mary Poppins!

    Wait.. You're not flipping out to watch a new movie... And your services ARE working.. You're just upset about Mary. Freaking. Poppins. The same Mary Poppins you can go out and get for $5 and watch any time you want?

    Me: Okay, well let's just make sure you're going to the right folder... (walk him through the steps, and he's still getting the same error, so I send a signal to his box and we powercycle. It's still not working).

    Me: Okay, sir, since you're still unable to get this, I'm going to go ahead and send a technician to see what the problem is. Is 1p-3p this afternoon alright?

    SC: You mean I have to wait around all day to watch Mary Poppins?! But I want to watch it now! I pay for this service! (VOD is free, and while this is normally a subscription VOD this weekend it's FREEVIEW weekend....)

    Me: Well, sir, this is the soonest I'm able to get anyone out there, and the tech WILL be there this afternoon...

    SC: This is absolute crap! I wish I had any other option for cable than YOU PEOPLE! Your service is terrible and utter crap. Are you going to be turning this on for eight or nine more hours since I'm missing out on it?

    Me: Well, sir, since this is not a normal option, and is something that corporate turns on and off, I have no control over when the freeview ends.

    SC: Bullshit! I demand you turn this on for an extra nine hours!

    Me: Sir, unfortunately I'm unable to do that. Corporate turned it on at midnight last night, and will shut it off at 11:59pm on Monday. Here's your work order number, the tech will be there between one and three, is there anything else I can do for you?

    SC: Yeah! Fix my shit!

    Me: The technician will do that between one and three. Please hold for a recording regarding your trouble call, and thank you for calling XXX.


    Really? I mean really? I can understand if you woke up and your internet or phone or cable were completely off but really? It's not even 9am and you're calling me to scream and cuss because you can't watch Mary. Freaking. Poppins.
    Tags: None
  • #2
    Are you sure he wasn't trying to watch "Mary's Cherry Poppin"?


    "All I've ever learned from love was how to shoot somebody who out-drew ya"

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    • #3
      Same-day service? That's bloody good.

      Rapscallion

      Comment

      • #4
        Quoth Rapscallion View Post
        Same-day service? That's bloody good.

        Rapscallion

        I work the 7a-4p shift (yay for an hour of Out Of Seat Activity -OOSA- when I first got in!) That was one of two appointments I had left for that day in his area.


        Quoth Sheldonrs View Post
        Are you sure he wasn't trying to watch "Mary's Cherry Poppin"?


        Unfortunately, yes. I am 100% sure. That's what makes it even worse... I mean if it was p0rn okay, it'd be one thing... But Mary. Freaking. Poppins? As in "A spoon full of sugar" Yeah. THAT Mary Poppins. That's what he was cussing and screaming about. I wonder what Mary would have thought.

        Comment

        • #5
          Aww, poor little bubbykins couldn't watch Mary Poppins, I'm crying on the inside for him

          Dude need to get a life
          I am but a tiny, barren, insignificant rock caught in the glorious orbit of your shining sun. Gravekeeper.

          Comment

          • #6
            Quoth Sheldonrs View Post
            Are you sure he wasn't trying to watch "Mary's Cherry Poppin"?


            I think he was..after all, a spoonful of sugar helps the "medicine" go down.
            I don't get paid enough to kiss your a**! -Groezig 5/31/08
            Another day...another million braincells lost...-Sarlon 6/16/08
            Chivalry is not dead. It's just direly underappreciated. -Samaliel 9/15/09

            Comment

            • #7
              HAHAHAHA! A commercial for the Disney movie on demand thing just came in and I about busted a gut when they said "Mary Poppins!"

              Comment

              • #8
                Quoth sprocket79 View Post
                HAHAHAHA! A commercial for the Disney movie on demand thing just came in and I about busted a gut when they said "Mary Poppins!"
                So good I didn't pick up my soda when I was going to or my new computer would have had a shower!

                Comment

                • #9
                  (Sing along!)

                  Chim-chimney
                  Christ-criminy
                  Chim-chim-cheerie!
                  That man was as sucky
                  As sucky can be!

                  Imagine working the phones during the Heidi Bowl!
                  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Heidi_Game
                  Suckiness is reinforced up OR down at every transaction. Accepting BS makes them worse for all of us; firm fairness trains them to suck less.

                  Comment

                  • #10
                    I dunno, man, that movie can be pretty scary...

                    Muhahahah, I say, Muhahahaha
                    "For a musician, the SNES sound engine is like using Crayola Crayons. Nobuo Uematsu used Crayola Crayons to paint the Sistine Chapel." - Jeremy Jahns (re: "Dancing Mad")
                    "The difference between an amateur and a master is that the master has failed way more times." - JoCat
                    "Thinking is difficult, therefore let the herd pronounce judgment!" ~ Carl Jung
                    "There's burning bridges, and then there's the lake just to fill it with gasoline." - Wiccy, reddit
                    "Retail is a cruel master, and could very well be the most educational time of many people's lives, in its own twisted way." - me
                    "Love keeps her in the air when she oughta fall down...tell you she's hurtin' 'fore she keens...makes her a home." - Capt. Malcolm Reynolds, "Serenity" (2005)
                    Acts of Gord – Read it, Learn it, Love it!
                    "Our psychic powers only work if the customer has a mind to read." - me

                    Comment

                    • #11
                      Quoth South Texan
                      "Oh, NOW I understand why you are this way, sir. I'm so sorry, but our technician with the protoscope is off this afternoon. Maybe some bran fiber would help?"

                      .
                      Note to self: Rule Number One is there for a *reason*.

                      Damn, snorting potato chips hurts . . .

                      Comment

                      • #12
                        Quoth EricKei View Post
                        I dunno, man, that movie can be pretty scary...

                        Muhahahah, I say, Muhahahaha
                        Darn it, I was going to post that video!
                        It doesn't matter if you win or lose, as long as you look really cool doing it! -- Julio Scoundrel, Order of the Stick

                        Comment

                        • #13
                          Super-sucky customers with undisclosed psychosis
                          When you first pick up the phone you think it's just neurosis
                          But if they don't get what they want you'll make your diagnosis
                          They're super-sucky customers with undisclosed psychosis!

                          Now, when I worked the telephones for BA Mastercard
                          I took a message to my boss and said this one was hard
                          The customer was swearing like a longshoreman on crack
                          She'd maxed her cards and didn't know she had to pay us back!

                          She's a super-sucky customer with undisclosed psychosis
                          Slightly less appealing than a bad case of cirrhosis
                          But if they're on the phone you can't tell they have halitosis
                          Super-sucky customers with undisclosed psychosis!

                          When I was flipping burgers for the King on Zyzzyx Road
                          A customer walked up to me and said she'd found a toad
                          Shoved inside her burger and it made her stomach crawl
                          I said "Where is it now?" She said, "Of course, I ate it all!"

                          Come on, everybody, sing along, okay?

                          Super-sucky customers with undisclosed psychosis
                          If they're off their meds their doctors should be upping doses
                          Walking through the door right when the supermarket closes
                          Super-sucky customers with undisclosed psychosis

                          Now I work an office job, no customers for me
                          But don't start thinking just because I work here that I'm free
                          Upon my desk there sits a thing that won't leave me alone
                          It yells at me and mocks me, it's my dreaded telephone!

                          Super-sucky customers with undisclosed psychosis
                          Think that every service should come with a spill of roses
                          Put your own joke here; I'm out of words that rhyme with "-osis"
                          For super-sucky customers with undisclosed psychosis!

                          Love, Who?

                          Comment

                          • #14
                            Quoth Rapscallion View Post
                            Same-day service? That's bloody good.

                            Rapscallion
                            That's _incredibly_ good! My entire cable went out on a Friday and it was _Tuesday_ before they could get anybody out to look at it! And the tech never showed, which caused me to cancel cable entirely.

                            Comment

                            • #15
                              Ben, I think I love you . . .

                              Comment

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