I knew I was on to a winner with this one the second he walked through the door, tapped me on the shoulder having walked past my manager behind the empty desk and demanded...not asked....DEMANDED to be shown to "That cat book you have in the window...NOW..."
I make what I considered to be the very valid point that there are at least 3 books and a set of notecards into the window with cats on, which end of the window was it in, what does the jacket look like? (The window is divided into two sections, half for kids books and half for everything else) Naturally, due to his highly pressing schedule and the fact that I am a mere peasant in comparison to his holiness, he doesn't appreciate the question and proceeds to inform me that he "doesn't have time for me to mess him around" and he wants me to show him "the bloody cat book RIGHT NOW".
I lead him to the most likely section which seems to have been a gamble worth playing since he pounces on a book there as if it were the grail and waves me off with a limp wristed hand. I go back to putting the stock out.
He wanders up to the counter, by this time my manager is fielding a phonecall, so, seeing as he's huffing and sighing cos she's just not getting off that phone quick enough for his majesty, I go to serve him.
Him: "This is grubby. I want a clean copy."
Me: "I'm sorry sir, the only copies we have are the two you just looked at and the display in the window."
Him: "The other two were worse than this. *pauses and flips over book to point out teeniest tiniest brown smudge of shelfwear* Look at this! It's filthy! Is it even new? What is this, chocolate?"
Me: "Well that's an awful waste of chocolate sir! How about I just lick that right offa there for you! I'm sure it'll comeup a treat with a lil spit shine and then everyone's happy, I've had my snack for the day and you get a shiny clean NEW book!"
Relax...I didn't...I gave it a bit of a polish and mr.stroppy went on his way without saying thank you...but in my head I was screaming it...
Is it new
...ooops, ya caught us...there we were thinking we'd just randomly shove a few third hand charity shop jobs on the shelves to see if we could con you poor unsuspecting customers out of a vastly reduced RRP...silly us for thinking you wouldn't spot it...OF COURSE IT'S NEW...moron...
Christmas is shaping up to be a good one....*waves teeniest flag in the world*
I make what I considered to be the very valid point that there are at least 3 books and a set of notecards into the window with cats on, which end of the window was it in, what does the jacket look like? (The window is divided into two sections, half for kids books and half for everything else) Naturally, due to his highly pressing schedule and the fact that I am a mere peasant in comparison to his holiness, he doesn't appreciate the question and proceeds to inform me that he "doesn't have time for me to mess him around" and he wants me to show him "the bloody cat book RIGHT NOW".
I lead him to the most likely section which seems to have been a gamble worth playing since he pounces on a book there as if it were the grail and waves me off with a limp wristed hand. I go back to putting the stock out.
He wanders up to the counter, by this time my manager is fielding a phonecall, so, seeing as he's huffing and sighing cos she's just not getting off that phone quick enough for his majesty, I go to serve him.
Him: "This is grubby. I want a clean copy."
Me: "I'm sorry sir, the only copies we have are the two you just looked at and the display in the window."
Him: "The other two were worse than this. *pauses and flips over book to point out teeniest tiniest brown smudge of shelfwear* Look at this! It's filthy! Is it even new? What is this, chocolate?"
Me: "Well that's an awful waste of chocolate sir! How about I just lick that right offa there for you! I'm sure it'll comeup a treat with a lil spit shine and then everyone's happy, I've had my snack for the day and you get a shiny clean NEW book!"
Relax...I didn't...I gave it a bit of a polish and mr.stroppy went on his way without saying thank you...but in my head I was screaming it...



Christmas is shaping up to be a good one....*waves teeniest flag in the world*
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