Boss threatens to punch SC

[Erin]

The worst coffee on the planet is the nasty crap my mom drinks.

She gets it mail ordered from Louisiana. It's got this chicory crap in it.

I think she gets some sort of sick thrill out of offering coffee to people who come to visit her. They'll take a drink of the coffee, and then you see this look on their face like "WTF did I just get tricked into drinking??".

It's nasty...and she makes my dad drink the same stuff. She wont even let him brew a nice pot of hazelnut coffee that I buy him at Christmastime. My mom has this weird fascination with all things Southern. (she was born in Mississippi) It's just weird. I think it has something to do with the head injury she had when she was 17. (unconscious for 5 weeks) She gets these weird obsessions that she cant get rid of.

This is probably one of the reasons that I'm not a coffee drinker. She ruined the experience for me.

[Zombi]

oh, I beg to differ... the worst coffee on the planet is served at the hotel

Oh no, the worst coffee in the world is served at our university functions. We use it to lure students to seminars - they seem to live in hope that THIS TIME it'll taste decent...

[MrsEclipse]

Okay... assuming that you could somehow get her the cappuccino she was demanding...

Why would anyone even want to drink something that your boss pulled out of his ass? Must have been some serious caffeine jonesin'.

[protege]

The nastiest coffee, is probably at the garage across town. They use it to loosen various nuts and bolts on their "project cars" Seriously, that stuff makes me want to

[Imogene]

I think she gets some sort of sick thrill out of offering coffee to people who come to visit her.

My classmates one day started offering around a package of lemon gum, just to watch people try some and see their faces screw up in disgust. Until the package got to me, and I took one, and went, "Mmm. Menthol." And I'm not a smoker. And I chewed the hell out of that package, because they gave it to me, and I went out and found a new one, to share around at work.
Gave a piece to the cool AM, he bit in, and immediately spit it out, so I popped two more pieces into my mouth, just to tease him.

[EricKei]

The worst coffee on the planet is the nasty crap my mom drinks.

She gets it mail ordered from Louisiana. It's got this chicory crap in it.

Hey now. Just because y'all can't handle properly strong coffee...

Kidding.

I just wanna know this, tho -- how the HELL can you screw up Community coffee? Scoop into mug, brew until it is the consistency (and temperature) of cooling lava, add equal parts scalding hot milk, dip a baguette in it, and chug. The only brand more popular here is Cafe du Monde >_> Pretty much every restaurant in town serves it. It's my understanding that chicory was originally added to make the coffee here *more* mellow. Chicory blends are --by far-- the most popular varieties.

The thing is, our coffee drinkers LIKE the stuff strong enough to sit up and bark. That's why only the foul mouthbreathers always welcome tourists are the primary clientele at Starbucks. "Needlessly strong coffee with milk in it" isn't exactly a novelty here.

PS, I don't drink black gold myself, but the Dad was one of those people who started drinking it (via the "dip french bread/baguette in it and eat that" method) from the time he was a little kid.

[shadow1186]

but but but...every place ever should KNOW and MAKE iced cappuccino's!!!!! What is this world coming too

[Green_Fairy]

what really gets me is that an iced cappuccino doesn't really exist. a proper cappuccino is the espresso on the bottom, a little steamed milk, and the foam all the way to the top. if you put ice in it, the foam'll collapse.

...but that's just me being technical.

[shadow1186]

You know, thats what I originally thought as well. However, Starbucks does have a "correct" iced cappuccino. You have the ice in the cup, pour espresso in, fill about half way with cold milk, then actually top off with foam from steamed milk. As to how it actually tastes, not that great, but I was intrigued when I saw the directions and made one for myself.

[EricKei]

what really gets me is that an iced cappuccino doesn't really exist.

Don't be silly. Logic hath no sway over the wiles of Marketing.

[Erin]

When I worked at McDonald's back in the early 90's, a customer taught me how to make iced coffee. You fill up the cup with ice, pour some coffee into it, put more ice in it, pour more coffee over it, add ice to replace the melting ice again.

Take a couple of creamers, pour them into the mix and then add more coffee.

The guy said that I made them perfect, and he would always have me make them for him when he'd come back. He usually came thru our drive-thru, but he was usually nice and came thru when we werent busy. If we were busy, he'd get a couple of cups ice to go with his hot coffee and some creamers and mix it himself. (I didnt mind making it for him, sometimes even when we were busy once I got used to the right ice to coffee ratio)

[otakuneko]

You fill up the cup with ice, pour some coffee into it

You mean it wasn't obvious this is how to make iced coffee? He had to explain this to people and they often didn't get it?

You make iced coffee the same way you make any iced drink: pour it over ice.
I don't bother with adding extra ice after pouring though -- I usually get the right amount of ice right at the start. I drink all of my coffee cold -- either from being stuck in the freezer for an hour or two, or being iced. I have a cat tongue, you see. I don't eat or drink anything hot. (and I love pizza fresh out of the fridge, too)

Oh, and the worst coffee I ever had?

Starbucks.


Edit: come to think of it, maybe the problem is people just have a brain fart when someone orders an iced version of a drink normally served hot? Coffee == hot is just so ingrained in them that "iced coffee" causes a mental WTF loop, preventing the logic of iced = pour it over ice from executing maybe.

[Erin]

That guy liked extra ice in his coffee...which is why I always added more ice to it.

[mharbourgirl]

Hey now. Just because y'all can't handle properly strong coffee...

Kidding.

I just wanna know this, tho -- how the HELL can you screw up Community coffee? Scoop into mug, brew until it is the consistency (and temperature) of cooling lava, add equal parts scalding hot milk, dip a baguette in it, and chug. The only brand more popular here is Cafe du Monde >_> Pretty much every restaurant in town serves it. It's my understanding that chicory was originally added to make the coffee here *more* mellow. Chicory blends are --by far-- the most popular varieties.

The thing is, our coffee drinkers LIKE the stuff strong enough to sit up and bark. That's why only the foul mouthbreathers always welcome tourists are the primary clientele at Starbucks. "Needlessly strong coffee with milk in it" isn't exactly a novelty here.

PS, I don't drink black gold myself, but the Dad was one of those people who started drinking it (via the "dip french bread/baguette in it and eat that" method) from the time he was a little kid.

I am sitting here in utter shock at the travesty I see before me. You.. actually want to drink... chicory.

I have chewed juniper berries that had a more pleasant taste. And I have some weird tastes when it comes to bitter things, but chicory is...

Dude, how can you justify this perversion of the natural order? Coffee is not meant to be combined with..roots. And nasty-tasting roots at that. Oh this is so wrong. I'm speechless. Really.

[xcaptainhowdyx]

I can attest to the worst coffee in the world being at hotels. back when I was a night manager, my cheap ass owner would have me start the coffee in the early am and then had the audacity to tell me I couldn't have any. I didn't listen very well. Anyway being a cheap ass he bought the premix for a coffee maker that was bigger than what he had and then he had me water it down. To me the stuff that wasn't watered down was better than the shite he served the customers. But what do I know, I'm not the jackass who spends all of my dead father's money and still lives with his mommy.