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Hi! Long time lurker, first time poster. I love this site, even though the “sucky customer” stories make me upset for humanity in general.
A little background info on me:
I work part-time at a large bookstore that likes the color green.
I started working there in July of 2008. It’s my first job, and I decided to work there because I absolutely love books. I’m also a full-time college student.
My particular store is one of the small-scale stores, meaning we have books and a café, but no music or DVD department. Because we’re a small store, we have a smaller staff, and most of us are trained at cash-wrap (being a cashier), at customer service, and in café. I work about 60% in customer service, and 40% café. So I’m well-trained in both areas. I like it; it keeps things from getting boring.
When I first started my job, I was surprised to find out that I actually liked working with people. 95% of the time, I love my job. The customers are great. And I’m one of those really annoyingly perky people. I’m happy almost all the time, and it takes a lot to get me upset. But I do get some sucky customers. And thus, the reason I am here.
Anyway, here are just a couple of my stories. I’ll post more later.
Serial Killer Lady
Me = Me!
SW = Sucky Woman
One day I was working customer service and received a phone call from a woman looking for a book on serial killers. Not just any book, though. She wanted a serial killer dictionary, because she was writing a research paper on serial killers.
Me: [Looking through system to see what books we have on “serial killers.”] Well, it looks like we have some books that detail some of the most notorious serial killers.”
SW: [Very snippy] No. I don’t want that. I want a book that lists the different types of serial killers.
Me: Different… types?
SW: [Sighs, upset] Yes. There are different types of serial killers. They have different methods, different motives. There are… [She lists some types, I suppose, the names of which I don’t remember. She’s very detailed in the type of book she wants: a very short book that only lists the types of serial killers and a short definition of each.]
Me: Okay… [Looks through system some more.] I’m sorry, ma’am, but I don’t see any books that list the different types.
SW: [Still persistent] It wouldn’t be a long book, just a dictionary that lists the different types and short explanations for each one.
Me: [Looks through search results again, knowing that I didn’t miss anything] I’m sorry, ma’am, but there just aren’t any books on that subject.
SW: Well, what am I supposed to do then? I have to write my report.
Me: You could try the Internet. I google just about everything.
SW: [Pissy] I tried that. I searched the Internet for hours and there was nothing.
Me: *If there’s nothing on the Internet on that subject, what on earth would make her think that there’s a book on it???* I’m sorry. But there aren’t any books like that.
SW: Well, why not?
Me: *Why not? Because most people would prefer to have real-life examples, more in-depth explanations on serial killers, not some tiny “dictionary” of sorts.* [Takes deep breath] I don’t know, ma’am. I assume no one has ever written one.
SW: Well, someone should. They would make millions. Millions.
Me: [Unsure what to say.] Um, yeah.
SW: [Continues her rant on how someone should write this book because he/she would become a millionaire, then hangs up, much to my relief.]
Cheesecake Man
Me = Me!
SM = Sucky man
Late last year, I was working in our café, when a man came up to the register.
Me: Hi [Big smile] What can I get for you today?
SM: [No greeting, no smile, just] Do you sell whole cheesecakes?
Me: [Still smiling] Yes, we do! If we don’t have a whole one of the type you want here, we can order it for you as well, and it will be in within a week. [I said this because it was a Friday or Saturday, and we get shipments on Mondays, so there was a good chance we wouldn’t have an entire cheesecake available. At the time we carried original, key lime, some chocolate cake thing, Godiva cheesecake, and one other flavor, I think.]
SM: Do you have a whole key lime?
Me: Let me go check.
I go to the refrigerator in a little room behind the café area that the customers see. We’re a smaller store, so we don’t have a lot of space. Our cheesecakes are stacked two deep, two wide, and 4 tall. So I have to pull the ones in front out to look at the ones behind them. I find a key lime, and I open the lid of the box to see if it’s a whole cake or if some pieces have already been put on display. It’s not a whole one. I do some more maneuvering to see if I can find another key lime, but we don’t have any others. *Note: This took approximately 2 minutes. I know this because I sing. All the time. (Have the time I don’t even know I’m doing it.) I did know it this time though, and the song is normally 3 minutes with intro and guitar solos and stuff. If you take all that out and factor in the fact that I sing (and talk) really fast, it’s about 2 minutes.* Anyway, I go back out to tell the customer
Me: I’m sorry. We don’t have any whole key lime cheesecakes. We can place an order for one for you though, no extra charge.
SM: [Looking very impatient and upset at having had to wait] No, I don’t want to order any. [Looks at our options again] Do you have any whole Godiva?
Me: [Internally sighing, all while keeping a brilliant smile on my face.] I’m not sure. I’ll have to go check.
And off I go again, to look through each cheesecake again. (In hindsight, I should have seen what whole cheesecakes we did have the first time, but at the time I didn’t work in the café too often and didn’t think to anticipate that.) Again, the checking process didn’t take but a minute ot two. Unfortunately, we didn’t have any whole Godiva cheesecakes either. I go back out to tell the customer.
Me: I’m sorry, sir, but we don’t have any whole Godiva cheesecakes either.
SM: [Snaps at me] Well it took you long enough. I've been waiting for more than 10 minutes! You should know what product you have.
Me: [Okay, no more Mr. Nice Guy… Ms. Nice Girl? Either way, once someone gets pissy with me, my nice attitude disappears into the ether.] I do know what product we have. I don’t know how much of it we have, because I don’t have a perpetual inventory system set up in my head to know how much of every item we have at all times. I don’t work every day, and I have no way to keep up with all of that.
SM: [Looks slightly surprised that someone stood up to him, but is still very pissed] Well getting mad isn’t going to help matters.
Me:
Well, being impatient isn’t going to help anything either.
SM: [Glares at me, then walks off]
I was in a bad mood the rest of my shift.
The Medicine Man
NSM: Not sucky man
Me: Guess who?
This wasn’t really a “sucky” situation, but it sure was… uncommon. (I was working customer service, by the way)
NSM: I’m looking for one of those medicine books that shows pictures of all the different types of pills.
Me: [Takes him to the section and shows him the most popular book of that kind]
NSM: Thanks. [Starts flipping through the book, looks confused.]
Me: Is there something else I can help you with?
NSM: Well… Do you know if there’s a way to look up in this book to find out what a pill is?
Me: [Confused] I’m sorry, what?
NSM: [Reaches into pocket and pulls out a Ziploc bag with a small white pill in it.] I found this in my daughter’s room, and I need to know what it’s for. My friend told me I should look it up in one of these books. But I didn’t know they’d be so big. [The book’s probably 1000 pages or more]
Me:
Well, it’ll definitely take you a long time to find it in that book.
NSM: So what should I do?
Me: Maybe you could google it? Or maybe take it to a doctor or a pharmacy and see if they can identify it.
NSM: [Looks happy] That’s a great idea! Thanks!
Me:
In hindsight, I wish I had just wished the guy good luck finding it in that book. I hate that I gave him the idea to go to a pharmacy. Maybe he had good reason to suspect his daughter of doing drugs, but as a teenager (well, at the time I was 19. I'm 20 now), I felt like I was betraying a friend. Not really sure why.
Anyway, that's all for now! I'll post more of my awesome tales later.
A little background info on me:
I work part-time at a large bookstore that likes the color green.
I started working there in July of 2008. It’s my first job, and I decided to work there because I absolutely love books. I’m also a full-time college student.
My particular store is one of the small-scale stores, meaning we have books and a café, but no music or DVD department. Because we’re a small store, we have a smaller staff, and most of us are trained at cash-wrap (being a cashier), at customer service, and in café. I work about 60% in customer service, and 40% café. So I’m well-trained in both areas. I like it; it keeps things from getting boring.
When I first started my job, I was surprised to find out that I actually liked working with people. 95% of the time, I love my job. The customers are great. And I’m one of those really annoyingly perky people. I’m happy almost all the time, and it takes a lot to get me upset. But I do get some sucky customers. And thus, the reason I am here.
Anyway, here are just a couple of my stories. I’ll post more later.
Serial Killer Lady
Me = Me!
SW = Sucky Woman
One day I was working customer service and received a phone call from a woman looking for a book on serial killers. Not just any book, though. She wanted a serial killer dictionary, because she was writing a research paper on serial killers.
Me: [Looking through system to see what books we have on “serial killers.”] Well, it looks like we have some books that detail some of the most notorious serial killers.”
SW: [Very snippy] No. I don’t want that. I want a book that lists the different types of serial killers.
Me: Different… types?
SW: [Sighs, upset] Yes. There are different types of serial killers. They have different methods, different motives. There are… [She lists some types, I suppose, the names of which I don’t remember. She’s very detailed in the type of book she wants: a very short book that only lists the types of serial killers and a short definition of each.]
Me: Okay… [Looks through system some more.] I’m sorry, ma’am, but I don’t see any books that list the different types.
SW: [Still persistent] It wouldn’t be a long book, just a dictionary that lists the different types and short explanations for each one.
Me: [Looks through search results again, knowing that I didn’t miss anything] I’m sorry, ma’am, but there just aren’t any books on that subject.
SW: Well, what am I supposed to do then? I have to write my report.
Me: You could try the Internet. I google just about everything.
SW: [Pissy] I tried that. I searched the Internet for hours and there was nothing.
Me: *If there’s nothing on the Internet on that subject, what on earth would make her think that there’s a book on it???* I’m sorry. But there aren’t any books like that.
SW: Well, why not?
Me: *Why not? Because most people would prefer to have real-life examples, more in-depth explanations on serial killers, not some tiny “dictionary” of sorts.* [Takes deep breath] I don’t know, ma’am. I assume no one has ever written one.
SW: Well, someone should. They would make millions. Millions.
Me: [Unsure what to say.] Um, yeah.
SW: [Continues her rant on how someone should write this book because he/she would become a millionaire, then hangs up, much to my relief.]
Cheesecake Man
Me = Me!
SM = Sucky man
Late last year, I was working in our café, when a man came up to the register.
Me: Hi [Big smile] What can I get for you today?
SM: [No greeting, no smile, just] Do you sell whole cheesecakes?
Me: [Still smiling] Yes, we do! If we don’t have a whole one of the type you want here, we can order it for you as well, and it will be in within a week. [I said this because it was a Friday or Saturday, and we get shipments on Mondays, so there was a good chance we wouldn’t have an entire cheesecake available. At the time we carried original, key lime, some chocolate cake thing, Godiva cheesecake, and one other flavor, I think.]
SM: Do you have a whole key lime?
Me: Let me go check.
I go to the refrigerator in a little room behind the café area that the customers see. We’re a smaller store, so we don’t have a lot of space. Our cheesecakes are stacked two deep, two wide, and 4 tall. So I have to pull the ones in front out to look at the ones behind them. I find a key lime, and I open the lid of the box to see if it’s a whole cake or if some pieces have already been put on display. It’s not a whole one. I do some more maneuvering to see if I can find another key lime, but we don’t have any others. *Note: This took approximately 2 minutes. I know this because I sing. All the time. (Have the time I don’t even know I’m doing it.) I did know it this time though, and the song is normally 3 minutes with intro and guitar solos and stuff. If you take all that out and factor in the fact that I sing (and talk) really fast, it’s about 2 minutes.* Anyway, I go back out to tell the customer
Me: I’m sorry. We don’t have any whole key lime cheesecakes. We can place an order for one for you though, no extra charge.
SM: [Looking very impatient and upset at having had to wait] No, I don’t want to order any. [Looks at our options again] Do you have any whole Godiva?
Me: [Internally sighing, all while keeping a brilliant smile on my face.] I’m not sure. I’ll have to go check.
And off I go again, to look through each cheesecake again. (In hindsight, I should have seen what whole cheesecakes we did have the first time, but at the time I didn’t work in the café too often and didn’t think to anticipate that.) Again, the checking process didn’t take but a minute ot two. Unfortunately, we didn’t have any whole Godiva cheesecakes either. I go back out to tell the customer.
Me: I’m sorry, sir, but we don’t have any whole Godiva cheesecakes either.
SM: [Snaps at me] Well it took you long enough. I've been waiting for more than 10 minutes! You should know what product you have.
Me: [Okay, no more Mr. Nice Guy… Ms. Nice Girl? Either way, once someone gets pissy with me, my nice attitude disappears into the ether.] I do know what product we have. I don’t know how much of it we have, because I don’t have a perpetual inventory system set up in my head to know how much of every item we have at all times. I don’t work every day, and I have no way to keep up with all of that.
SM: [Looks slightly surprised that someone stood up to him, but is still very pissed] Well getting mad isn’t going to help matters.
Me:
Well, being impatient isn’t going to help anything either.SM: [Glares at me, then walks off]
I was in a bad mood the rest of my shift.
The Medicine Man
NSM: Not sucky man
Me: Guess who?
This wasn’t really a “sucky” situation, but it sure was… uncommon. (I was working customer service, by the way)
NSM: I’m looking for one of those medicine books that shows pictures of all the different types of pills.
Me: [Takes him to the section and shows him the most popular book of that kind]
NSM: Thanks. [Starts flipping through the book, looks confused.]
Me: Is there something else I can help you with?
NSM: Well… Do you know if there’s a way to look up in this book to find out what a pill is?
Me: [Confused] I’m sorry, what?
NSM: [Reaches into pocket and pulls out a Ziploc bag with a small white pill in it.] I found this in my daughter’s room, and I need to know what it’s for. My friend told me I should look it up in one of these books. But I didn’t know they’d be so big. [The book’s probably 1000 pages or more]
Me:
Well, it’ll definitely take you a long time to find it in that book. NSM: So what should I do?
Me: Maybe you could google it? Or maybe take it to a doctor or a pharmacy and see if they can identify it.
NSM: [Looks happy] That’s a great idea! Thanks!
Me:
In hindsight, I wish I had just wished the guy good luck finding it in that book. I hate that I gave him the idea to go to a pharmacy. Maybe he had good reason to suspect his daughter of doing drugs, but as a teenager (well, at the time I was 19. I'm 20 now), I felt like I was betraying a friend. Not really sure why.
Anyway, that's all for now! I'll post more of my awesome tales later.
to 
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is all over the place and I believe that EvilQueen has cookies.
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